


Not Your Bus Crash

by LadyAnatares



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Swapfell (Undertale), And then they were roommates, Bus Crash, But he'll get over it, Character Death, Don't copy to another site, Dubious Consent, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Kidnapping, Multi, Multiple Partners, NSFW themes, Near Death Experiences, Non-binary character, Polyamory, Reader is determined, Romantic Comedy, Sans gets hurt, Some major characters are dead, Soul Bond, Soulmates, Suggestive Themes, Trans Character, Trans Male Character, Trans Sans, possible smut? I don't know yet, quicker burn than I usually do, reader has magic, reader is female, russ is an edgy flirty boi, sans is a soft edgy boi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-03-16
Packaged: 2021-02-24 16:54:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 48
Words: 63,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22121272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyAnatares/pseuds/LadyAnatares
Summary: This is a blend of a couple of ideas I've had floating around in my head for a while and finally decided to commit to one fic. The Royal delegation is heading north to sort out refugee status and establish an embassy in Canada's capital now that the barrier has been destroyed, but things take a turn when their carefully plotted trip is derailed by an almost fatal bus crash.Just as he's calculating how to get the monsters out safely as the vehicle is free-falling off of a cliff, he notices you doing something out of the corner of his eye as the bus slows it's descent. Did you just save them all?
Relationships: Alphys/Undyne (swapfell), Papyrus (Swapfell)/Reader, Sans (Swapfell)/Reader, W. D. Gaster (Swapfell)/Reader
Comments: 345
Kudos: 742





	1. The Crash.

“Is everybody okay?!”

The skeleton looks on suspiciously as you start checking over the other passengers. Disquieted panic permeates the small space – a baby cries in a shocked mother’s arms, a teen is texting a relative with tears in his eyes, an older man is having issues calming down from a hyperventilation fit…

But _you_ …

Did you really just _do_ that?

You check on an older couple near the front of the bus, and smile slightly as you realize that they seem to be okay.

“YOUR MAJESTY, HAVE YOU BEEN INJURED?!”

Sans is holding the side of his skull and gritting his teeth as he climbs over some fallen bags from the overhead bins to check on the Queen. She wrestles with her long scarlet red cloak for a moment, having been jostled in the crash, but seems unharmed as she stands from her seat.

“Who could have done this?!” she demands, sharp yellowed teeth flashing as she sneers. “Who knew we were taking this transport??”

Sans kneels in deference to Queen Toriel, an irritated scowl on his own skeletal face.

“MY SECURITY PROTOCOLS WERE FLAWLESS, MY QUEEN! I HAVE BEEN PLANNING THIS JOURNEY FOR MONTHS! WHOEVER FIGURED OUT WE WERE ON _THIS_ COACH INSTEAD OF ANOTHER MEANS OF TRANSPORTATION MUST BE A GENIUS MASTERMIND!”

It _is_ a bit suspicious that the bus they’re on would be set up to crash in the specific way that it almost did, he admits. Mutt stands from his seat and steps out into the aisle.

“Papyrus, what is your assessment of the situation we find ourselves in?” the Queen demands.

“guessin’ tha’ if they went t’ all the trouble t’ send us flyin’ off a cliff through a busted rail, that they’re gunna come lookin’ fer proof it did the job,” he growls out. “an’ finish the job if it didn’t. we should get movin’.”

Meanwhile, you’ve been working your way back down from the front of the bus. You survey the four monsters in front of you. “Are you guys okay? Any injuries?”

“darlin’, mind tellin’ me how you-“

“HUMAN! HOW _DARE_ YOU APPROACH THE QUEEN OF ALL MONSTERS WITHOUT SHOWING THE PROPER ETTIQUETTE?!” Sans jumps in front of the monster group in a defensive stance. “DON’T YOU KNOW WHO YOU’RE TALKING TO??”

You give him a flat look, irritated by his interruption. “Clearly I don’t, _junior_ ,” you sass him, putting your hand on the top of his skull and redirecting him to one side. “How about everyone else?”

“W-well, as _IF_ we’d need any help from _some filthy human_ a-anyway!” Undyne rasps, still pressed into her seat by the window behind the Queen.

“Guess you’re all rude today. Not like we all didn’t just survive the same bus crash or anything,” you grumble flippantly.

You push past Toriel to check on the remaining passengers behind them, who glares at you with teeth grit the whole way. You finish checking on each passenger on the bus, and breathe a sigh of relief as everyone seems to be alright, bruises and some minor cases of shock aside.

As you head back towards the front of the bus, a hand grabs your arm firmly on the way past the monsters again. You turn around and jerk away, but the tall skeleton’s long phalanges hold firm.

“ya don’t mind if we have a quick chat on th’ way back t’ civilization, right darlin’?” he says gruffly, clearly intending it to be less a friendly request and more of a demand. One side of his sharp toothy mouth seems to lift in a not-so-friendly smirk.

“… RIGHT!” Sans perks up. “HUMAN, WE’RE TAKING YOU IN FOR QUESTIONING!”

“ _No_ , I’m not going _anywhere_ with-“

Toriel massages her temples as Undyne grabs her bags for her. “Sans, I have had _quite enough_ of humans for _one_ day, is that _really_ necessary?”

Sans looks to his brother who nods. “YES, YOUR MAJESTY! THIS HUMAN IS THE ONLY ONE WHO SEEMS TO BE UNPERTURBED BY THE CRASH!” he points out.

You groan and roll your eyes, then fix your captor with a glare. “I already _said_ I’m not going anywhere with you, and you now have about _three seconds_ to let me go before I kick your ass.”

“This human thinks she’s tough!” Undyne cackles. “I’d LOVE to see you try and fight _Mutt_ , you _worthless fleshbag!_ ”

Mutt watches your eyes as they dart left and right briefly, then narrow at him. You jerk your arm violently away, but while his grip is solid, he’s forced to let go when _something_ comes between his hand and the sleeve of your jacket.

… And that’s all the proof he needs.

“Papyrus,” the Queen’s commanding voice snaps him back to the present. “Are we taking the human with us or not? I believe you _did_ say that we may have some unwelcome company coming shortly.”

“… right,” he assents, grabbing his duffel from the floor and swinging it over his shoulder with ease. “i know a shortcut ‘r two t’ get us outta the woods,” he offers.

You’re a problem he can deal with another day, now that he knows what you look like… And track the vibration of your _soul_.

The small royal delegation was on their way to the capital city of Ottawa to work on establishing the groundwork for a modified refugee status for monsters. Since their recent surfacing, monsters have been isolated and killed off by human groups left right and center – not any less violent than their Underground prison had been. Sans’ idea to take a series of short trips by bus and train to minimize risk to the Queen had been a good one, but it had meant days and days of travel that had just now been derailed. This was the longest leg of the journey and the first time they’d encountered any kind of resistance. Now they were back at the drawing board.

But _you_ … You had single-handedly made the crash significantly less damaging than it could have been. But no one came away with anything worse than a scratch.

The missing guardrail at the hairpin turn and the faulty brakes were a recipe made for disaster, and Mutt was _sure_ it was no coincidence. People _should_ have died.

… He needs to get the group to safety away from the crash site before he can do anything about an errant human mage.


	2. The Mutt.

You _bother_ him.

He hasn’t even seen you in over a week – he’s got way too much other stuff to worry about right now running security with his bro in Ottawa – but you haven’t left his mind even _once_ since the bus crash.

And people were starting to notice.

“Are you _done_ staring off into space today, Mutt?” Undyne demands. “Deliver this l-letter to A-Alphys before the end of the day, a-and let me know her response!” she flusters.

An envelope is shoved into his hand and he grunts as he tucks it into his jacket. Alphys is holding the fort at Underground’s cave entrance with the rest of the Royal Guard while they’re away with the Queen.

“PAPY, CAN YOU PICK ME UP SOME MEAN CREAM WHILE YOU’RE THERE?” Sans asks, cheekbones flushed a deep indigo as he requests his guilty pleasure treat.

He shoots him a wink that promises he will, and the smaller brother cackles victoriously.

“If you are passing through the castle on your way, please ensure that the guards did not rummage through my things while we are gone,” the Queen requests as she sips some of her tea. Then she looks at the teacup hanging from her claw. “Oh, and if you could fetch some more of my tea, that would be appreciated,” she adds dismissively.

He gives a lazy salute, and shortcuts his way back to Underground.

While he’s picking up some things for Undyne at the lab, he decides to see if he can sense your soul. He stretches his senses with his magic to see if he can sniff you out.

There’s a reason _why_ the monsters call him Mutt, after all. It has less to do with his dog collar or his occasionally submissive role as his brother’s lackey, and has more to do with his finely-honed magic-enhanced hunting instincts. When you want to track down prey, you send the dog in first.

He can pick up the smell of your human soul from hundreds, maybe thousands of miles away – and now that he’s actively trying to sense it, he does. You are very far away, but not in Ottawa, interestingly enough. He knew you had left several days ago, but hasn’t pinpointed your location since then. It’s in the same province, just… _Far_.

He remembers noticing you when you first got on the bus after they got themselves situated near the back. You’d had to take an aisle seat because there were few options left, but someone was willing to trade, which you thanked them for. You having had the window seat nearest to the side of the bus where they hit that turn might’ve been what saved them. The brakes had been a bit soft the whole trip, so you quickly realized what was about to happen and reacted quickly.

Mutt wraps up his errands as he replays the scenario over and over in his head.

He’d been asleep in the window seat next to Sans, so he was a touch slower to react to the sudden sense of vertigo everyone felt as the wheels lost contact with the ground. Humans screamed all around them, and as he was in the middle of calculating velocity if he had to pull the four of them out with a shortcut…

The falling sensation _stopped_ , as if caught by a massive hand, and the once airborne bus had slowly lowered to the ground.

And there you were, both hands pressed against the window, an intense look of concentration on your face.

No one else seemed to notice but him. Before they knew it they were on the ground, and you stood from your seat to begin checking everyone for injuries.

 _Even us monsters_ , Mutt thinks to himself. For that reason alone he thinks you couldn’t possibly be a plant – who would’ve been able to see through Sans’ travel arrangements in time to set _that_ up? Especially when the majority of the human world doesn’t even seem to believe that magic exists?

On his way through the laboratory he snatches up some books on the subject of human magic. Maybe those will put his mind at ease.

* * *

Once his errands are all complete, he sits down with Sans and hands over the Mean Cream.

“THANKS, PAPY!” the shorter skeleton beams, and Mutt manages to forget about you and the whole bus crash for just a moment.

“don’ mention it, bro,” he chuckles.

Despite the hardships and outright aggression from some human groups they’ve endured in the two months or so since the Barrier was broken, the surface still has a lot going for it.

The sun, for once, is warm and inviting and it lights up everything around it.

The decreased sense of danger is a welcome change, too – humans, when they chose to be violent against monsters, were more subtle and cunning about it. That created new challenges for Sans as Royal Strategist, a title created exclusively for him after demonstrating advanced puzzle traps for Her Majesty _and_ for successfully capturing the last human soul required to destroy the Barrier. But the way humans fought monsters was often different from how _monsters_ fought monsters – less direct aggression and more sneak attacks and sabotaged air brakes and guardrails, apparently.

“WHAT DOES YOUR WRAPPER SAY?”

Mutt crooks a bony brow at the wrapper for his mean cream. “yer lucky numbers ‘r five, twelve, twenty-one, twenty-eight-“

“LIAR,” Sans huffs, eye lights rolling in his sockets. “MINE SAYS THAT I INSTILL A DEEP SENSE OF TERROR IN EVERYONE I MEET!” he adds triumphantly.

That’s awful flattering for a mean cream, Mutt thinks. Sans must be lying about his too. He chuckles.

Sans sits down with a worried look on his face.

“ ‘s wrong bro?” Mutt asks, confused by his sudden shift in mood.

“I DON’T KNOW WHY THIS CROSSED MY MIND, BUT… DO YOU THINK… WAS THAT HUMAN AFRAID OF ME?” he asks guiltily.

“which human?”

“THE ONE FROM THE BUS, REMEMBER? I WAS GOING TO INTERROGATE HER, BUT THE QUEEN WANTED TO GET MOVING!” Sans exclaims. “I DON’T KNOW WHY BUT SHE _BOTHERS_ ME! WHY WAS SHE SO… SO…”

“… unafraid?” Mutt offers.

“YES!!” Sans launches to his feet and takes a combat stance. “SHE _SHOULD_ HAVE BEEN AFRAID OF US, SHOULDN’T SHE? I MEAN, WE’RE THE MOST POWERFUL MONSTERS IN THE UNDERGROUND!”

He’s surprised Sans is worked up about you too. You’ve definitely left an impression.

“… y’ still wanna interrogate ‘er?” he offers.

“YES! _OH!_ ” he realizes. “CAN YOU SENSE HER??”

“been sniffin’ ‘er out since the crash,” he admits. “if we got clearance i could narrow it down in a coupl’a hours.”


	3. The Mage.

“Absolutely **_not_**.”

The Queen glowers at the pair of skeletons kneeling before her.

“You will _banish_ this _foolish idea_ from both of your skulls **immediately**. We are fortunate enough to have survived the crash to _begin with_ , we do _not_ need to be stalking and heckling the other humans who were on that bus when we are in the midst of _gaining a foothold_ in the _humans’ **capital city!**_ ”

Toriel stands from her desk and rounds the corner to stand in front of it, well within striking distance of both skeletons.

“I will _begrudgingly_ admit that you two are some of my more _valuable_ subjects,” Toriel continues. “But that is _precisely why_ you cannot leave this building until negotiations are complete.”

“BUT, YOUR MAJESTY-“

A large red bastard sword is struck into the ground barely an inch from the top of Sans’ head, and the words die in his nonexistent throat as he feels the power radiating off the Queen’s summoned weapon.

“ **Do I make myself _clear?_** ”

“crystal, yer highness,” Mutt mutters out.

The sword is extricated from the floor, and Sans bites back a whimper.

“I admit, I _am surprised_ at _your_ involvement in this _ludicrous_ request, _Mutt_ ,” the Queen spits. “After all, you would not bring something so _trivial_ to me without _good reason_. _Have you_ a good reason to suggest _abandoning your post_ to seek out this human?”

“she’s a mage an’ has barrier magic,” he rattles off.

Sans gasps. “WH- ** _WHAT_** -“

The sword is thrown over their heads across the room and embeds itself in a stone column. The temperature rapidly increases and all of the documents on the desk incinerate to ash as the Queen _roars_ in anger.

“ _FIND HER!_ ” she booms. “ _FIND HER_ **_RIGHT THIS INSTANT!_** ”

Sans dares to glance upwards at the frazzled queen. “BUT, YOU SAID-“

“ ** _NOW!!!_** ”

Mutt stands and grips Sans by the shoulder to usher him out of the room.

* * *

“WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY ANYTHING _SOONER??_ ”

Sans is furious with him, though not quite as furious as Toriel just was. Mutt idly wonders if the building will still be there when they get back.

“wasn’ sure ‘bout what i saw, but i did some readin’,” he points out, holding up one of the books he pilfered from Undyne’s lab. “an’ i think ‘solid magic’ ‘s what did the trick t’ keep us from fallin’ that day.”

“AND SOLID MAGIC IS… _BARRIER_ MAGIC?”

“tha’s what i figure.”

“BUT… NO _WONDER_ TORIEL WAS SO UPSET!” Sans sympathizes, huffing at his brother. “FINDING OUT THAT THERE’S A HUMAN OUT THERE WHO COULD STEAL OUR FREEDOM BY SEALING US BEHIND A _NEW_ BARRIER IS BASICALLY _THE WORST NEWS EVER!_ ”

“’s why we gotta get ‘er on _our_ side, yeah?” Mutt winks.

“SHE’S _HUMAN_ , WHY WOULD SHE DO THAT?”

“not sure yet,” he admits. “but between th’ two o’ us, ‘m sure we can figure somethin’ out, yeah?”

* * *

“Good afternoon, _____ _____, IT Manager for BizCo, how can I help you?”

“It’s just me _____,” Erin from the front desk greets you over the phone.

“Oh hey Erin, did something come in for me?” You’re still waiting on the maintenance kit for that one printer after all, but the company said it was on backorder?

“Some _one_ , actually. You may want to come up here and see for yourself,” she tells you.

You don’t have any appointments today, and Erin is being weirdly shady about whoever came in to see you. Sighing, you tell her you’ll be right there and hang up the phone.

Grabbing an electronic tablet and a couple of business cards, you figure it could just be another vendor who found your LinkedIn page that wants to try to sell you on managed services or green technology. Prepared for a sales pitch one way or another, you steel yourself and head up to the front desk to greet your unexpected guest.

Only to find two familiar monsters standing there instead.

You clench your teeth as you force a smile for them. “Good afternoon, what can I do to help you two out?”

The shorter one in plate armour and indigo kerchief seems to be focused on the pamphlets littering the small lobby, but the taller one with the fur-lined biker jacket and dog collar is focused on you.

“got somethin’ to discuss wit’ ya, if y’ don’t mind. which way t’ yer office?” he boldly suggests.

Oh _no_ you are _not_ parading two unfamiliar monsters through the entire office in front of _everyone_. It’s bad _enough_ that they came in to ask for you at reception. Thinking about it, you tap away at the tablet cradled in your arm and nod behind them. “How about outside, instead? The weather’s rather nice today.”

He smirks as he seems to get the hint. After all, your fake customer service smile can only do so much to hide your glare. The short one takes a copy of each flyer he can snag, and you roll your eyes and sigh.

You escort them to the smoking area on the shadowy side of the building, which has no windows to the office and the least amount of street visibility you can manage on short notice. And you happen to know that no one currently at your company smokes, so there will be no one around to see you.

“Alright,” you turn to them, folding your arms with a huff. “Mind telling me exactly what the _fuck_ you two are _doing_ here??”

“what happened to the’ nice an’ friendly demeanor?” the tall one questions, amused.

“She rolled over and _died_ when _two monsters_ came to the front desk of my company asking for me,” you snarl. “You’ve been seen by the receptionist and by _all of the cameras_ on the way in! I don’t personally give _two craps_ about monsters, but my micromanaging boss reviews the footage _nightly_ , and I happen to _know_ he’s not a fan of your kind.” You’ll be lucky to still have a _job_ after this.

“what ‘bout that camera there?” he points upwards.

You turn the tablet to show the web console you’ve opened. “I paused the recording on that one. Pausing it means I don’t have to erase it later, which looks more suspicious in the logs than just not recording in the first place.” It’ll just look like a temporary system glitch skipped some footage if anything, which happens often enough as it is.

“some quick thinkin’ there darlin’,” he nods.

“That’s about all the damage control I could do for right now,” you grumble. “Now, back to telling me what the _hell_ it is that you two want?”

The small one looks apprehensively up at the taller one, then he clears his nonexistent throat. “HUMAN, WE KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST WEEK!”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you dismiss.

“PAPY SAW YOU USE _MAGIC_ TO STOP THE BUS FROM CRASH-“

You slap both your hands over his mouth. “Can you _possibly_ be any quieter??” you demand. His voice is obnoxiously loud and grating.

“so ya _do_ know what we’re talkin’ about,” the tall one smirks.

“ _No_ , I _don’t_ ,” you warn.

“listen darlin’,” he says, holding his hands up as if surrendering. “we don’ wanna fight ya. we wanna make _friends_ wit’ ya, an’ figure this magic thing out together, yeah?”

“Not interested. You’ve done _enough_ damage to my career for one day.”

“then, mebbe _we_ can hire ya?”

“ _What?_ ”

“THAT’S RIGHT!” the short one pipes up. “WHATEVER YOU’RE MAKING, WE CAN ALMOST CERTAINLY _DOUBLE_ IT!”

“Doing _what_ exactly? Being some monster’s pet science project? No thanks.”

It’s not about the money anyways, although this small startup certainly pays well enough. The work is alright there just isn’t enough of it, and your boss does leave a lot to be desired. That was the whole reason for your ‘appointment’ in Ottawa last week anyways – interviewing for a government position that would pay a bit more, but have more interesting work.

But that’s probably not going to pan out either after today. There would’ve been strict security requirements for that position if you were in consideration, and you’re pretty sure talking to these two is an automatic fail.

“though ‘m sure undyne’ll take a _real_ in’erest in ya, tha’s not what we had in mind,” ‘Papy’ continues. “you work security an’ computers, yeah? we’re setting up an office an’ could use some o’ that.”

“RIGHT!” the small one pipes up. “AND MAYBE YOUR MAGIC COULD HELP US WITH SECURITY TOO!”

“You guys don’t hear the word ‘no’ often enough, _do_ you?” you challenge.

“the queen’s real in’erested in-“

“ _Stop_ ,” you cut him off. “I said no already and I _meant_ it. I’m not going anywhere with either _one_ of you, and that’s _final_.”

“BUT, MISS _____-!“

“Get off company property before somebody sees you,” you wave him off, heading back around the building to head inside.

A hard hand grabs your wrist over the sleeve of your blazer, and you turn to see it’s the tall one again.

“i know y’ can jus’ shake me off darlin’, but listen,” he bargains. “’s not ev’ryday we find a human mage. we jus’ wanna try an’ make our case.”

“You’ve done _enough_ damage for one day.”

With that, you feel the power in your belly stir, and you push it to reach out and grab him. The skeleton looks startled as translucent red power effortlessly holds him there, and his shorter brother panics, looking at you with wide eye sockets.

Feeling that your point has been made, you sigh and head back inside.


	4. The Wakeup.

“MY SOUL FEELS FUNNY.”

“how d’ya mean, bro?”

Sans frowns as he holds his armour over the space below his ribcage, where his soul resides.

“I DON’T KNOW, IT JUST FEELS… _SAD?_ EVER SINCE WE SAW _____ YESTERDAY.”

After you went back inside, it took a minute but the hastily-crafted barrier you had trapped Mutt in had shattered like glass and disappeared, so you must have some way to cancel your solid magic creations without having to directly interact with them.

But that was hardly the most surprising thing about the barrier you’d stopped them with to Mutt. No, the part that he’s mixed up about is the fact that he didn’t feel nearly as terrified as he thought he would.

He couldn’t shortcut out of it – something in your magic prevented him from doing that. Human souls _are_ stronger than monster souls, even one as powerful as Mutt’s, though he never expected to put it to the test with an actual human mage. Feeling restrained is also a trigger response for him, thanks to their ‘ _father’_ , and the fact that he couldn’t physically move himself out of it either was further worrying.

But, instead of feeling petrified, he felt… _Your magic_ felt _warm_ , perhaps even comforting?

And to make matters even _more_ complicated, it seems like Sans’ soul is resonating with yours for some reason. He’s showing initial signs of it, at least. He _misses_ you, a human mage capable of creating barriers, and he doesn’t understand why.

“WE’RE GOING TO TRY AGAIN, RIGHT?”

“’course,” Mutt promises. “we jus’ caught ‘er in a bad mood. maybe showin’ up at ‘er work wasn’t the best openin’ move.”

“YEAH,” Sans agrees. “MAYBE WE SHOULD’VE TRIED SHOWING UP AT HER HOUSE INSTEAD!”

“tha’s not a half bad idea,” Mutt chuckles. “y’ ready to go?”

After all, he can tell that you’ve been in one place (likely your home) since the day they showed up at your job. Maybe you got shitcanned after all.

Sans stands from the bench, his sharp teeth displayed in a determined grin, holding out his hand to let him know he’s ready to go. Mutt rolls off his seat and grabs Sans in a headlock instead.

“MUTT! WHY YOU-“

A quick trip through the void later and they’re somewhere else.

* * *

You wake up from your mid-afternoon nap to your dog barking her little head off. Rolling to one side you grab onto her and sleepily start scolding her so that maybe you can catch a bit more sleep.

But she’s insistently trying to wriggle out of your grasp to growl at the closed bedroom door.

“Nora, come _on_ dog,” you whine.

She whimpers, but continues her protests.

This time you hear someone knocking on the front door downstairs. Nora starts up again with her high-pitched, shrieking chihuahua barks.

“What the _fuck_ ,” you curse, just a little more awake now.

Begrudgingly you roll out of your bed, slip on some pajama pants and a dirty tank top you found on the floor, and open the bedroom door so you can go see who it is.

Nora sprints past you to jump up onto the arm of the couch, continuing to bark and growl at the opening in the curtains for the front window. A third knock sends her into another frenzy of shrill barks, growls, and whining.

“ALRIGHT ALREADY, _GODS!_ ” you curse loudly, finally opening the door.

…

It’s those two skeletons again.

“… Nope.”

You slam the door in their faces and turn away.

Nearly slamming face-first into the ribcage of a very tall skeleton while you’re at it. Still not at a hundred percent, you flail away and quickly put one of your shields up between you and him.

“sorry fer lettin’ ourselves in, darlin’,” he drawls in that deep raspy tone, still visible through the translucent red wall. “but we’ve _really_ gotta chat.”

“_____, WE DON’T WANT TO HURT YOU!” the shorter one protests at his side. “AND, I DON’T THINK YOU WANT TO HURT US, EITHER!”

“Wanna bet?” you challenge bitterly. “You assholes cost me my _job_. How the fuck am I going to… No, you know what? Get the fuck out of my house, _NOW_.”

The two skeletons share a look, then they both disappear from sight. You blink, hard. Is that how they got in in the first place?

Nora yelps as the tall one reappears near her on the couch, yelping and cowering at the stranger. _That_ sets you off. _Nobody_ threatens your dog.

“listen, i know we got off on th’ wrong foot, but-“

You break the shield in front of you to give yourself more room to move. You reach towards him and try to grab him with a shield, intending to squeeze.

But a smaller, deceptively _strong_ hand grips your wrist before you can even try.

“WE DON’T WANT TO FIGHT YOU, WE JUST- **_AAAAHH!_** ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You accidentally did a thing and hurt SF!Sans. Warning for some minor depictions of gore next chapter. I figured it was the only way to get these three to calm down and actually talk to one another.
> 
> Also, this chapter is short because the next one is getting a bit out of hand on the word count...


	5. The Medic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, minor depictions of gore here as you try and patch Sans up. There's blood involved because I felt like there should be, but still not sure on that as a story decision. Again, this is all really improvised at this point ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

“We have to get your glove off, okay?”

Sans nods, his shark-like teeth clenched bitterly as you try to gently pull his dark blue glove off so you can see the damage.

“I’m really sorry, honestly,” you apologize for the tenth time in the last three minutes.

“I’VE HAD WORSE,” he grumbles. From the giant scar over his left eye socket, you think he might be telling the truth.

When you were restrained, you tried the same thing you did to Papyrus on the damn bus after it crashed, but this time you kind of overdid it. You created a small ‘barrier’ as they call it to push Sans’ hand off of your arm, but you were pissed off about them showing up again and about Papyrus getting so close to your dog, so you not only pushed outwards… You bent it _backwards_.

And then there was the utterly _haunting_ sound of several of Sans’ phalanges _snapping_ , and a surprised pained yell.

Clumsy introductions were made after you came back with the first aid supplies. You weren’t expecting bones to _bleed_ like that, but you grabbed every bit of gauze you could find in the bathroom drawer along with a nearly finished roll of medical tape.

You feel faint once his glove is off and you can see the damage, and Sans reflexively grabs your shoulder with his good hand to steady you. He’s way stronger than he looks and easily keeps you from toppling over.

“… I’ve got to wrap these so they stop bleeding,” you explain. “We should rinse them first so we can see the damage though.”

“MY HEALING MAGIC HAS ALREADY BEGUN WORKING TO STOP THE BLEEDING,” he says matter-of-factly. “BUT, WASHING THEM WOULD BE IDEAL SO THEY CAN BE SPLINTED,” he adds.

You guide him over to the kitchen and spray his hand clean of blood in the sink. His teeth are grit the entire time, keeping up a brave face so you won’t think less of him.

“I don’t really have anything to set them with, except uh…”

“… YOUR ‘SHIELDS’?” he offers.

“… Yeah. But that’s how this mess got started, isn’t it?”

His cheekbones turn a faint dark blue before offering you his injured hand again. “DO IT.”

… He trusts you? Well, he’s probably figured out that you didn’t mean to hurt him in the first place by how you reacted. Plus, Papyrus has been giving you the stink-eye the entire time from where he’s seated on your couch, your dog curled up next to him with one of her toys. Seeing how easily she calmed down and made friends has given you a little more reassurance that maybe these guys _don’t_ mean you any harm after all.

You take his hand on both of his as gently as possible, then look him in the dark blue eye lights. “This is probably going to hurt a _lot_ ,” you prepare him.

“I CAN TAKE IT.”

 _Very_ carefully, you take each phalange in your fingers and try and put the splintered pieces of them back into place by hand before wrapping them in small shields. You can feel him trembling slightly every time you have to push a particularly nasty looking bit back into place, but to his credit he never cries out.

“You’re very brave, you know,” you comment, trying to make conversation again now that the worst is just about over. “I don’t think I could be _half_ as calm as you’re being right now.”

“I DON’T NEED YOU TO TELL ME THAT,” he mumbles, looking away. “UM… HOW DO THEY WORK?”

“Hmm?”

“YOUR SHIELDS.”

“I guess growing up I always kind of wanted special powers of some sort,” you sigh. “And I found a website one day that basically taught me how to do it. I didn’t actually _believe_ that any of it would work, until it just _did_.”

“what’d it teach ya?” Papyrus inquires from the next room.

With Sans’ broken phalanges splinted with your shields, you let his hand drop and hold out both of yours to hold the air in front of you. “It was this website that was supposed to help me learn psychic powers or whatever, and one of the exercises has you sort of push your energy out from your body into a ball between your hands,” you explain, feeling your energy take shape in the air between your palms. “I started doing that here and there for years, until, like I said, it started becoming solid and having that faint red colour.”

Honestly, you’re not entirely sure why you’re being all open-book all of a sudden, but after what you did to Sans you feel like they might deserve to know more about the how.

Papyrus chuckles. “yer one ina million, y’know that? human mages ‘r rare, an’ yer not only a mage but one who already knows how to use yer magic.”

“Is _that_ why you guys keep stalking and harassing me?”

Sans is delicately tracing his broken phalanges with his other hand. “THERE REALLY WASN’T ANY BETTER WAY TO PUT IT. IF WE’D TRIED A MORE SUBTLE TACTIC YOU COULD HAVE JUST IGNORED US!”

“I’ve been doing my best with that as it is,” you sigh. “Okay, let me get a few things straight here; You two have derailed my life because you call me a mage and what I do magic. So _what?_ What’s so important about that to you guys that you need to barge in at my work and my house to, I don’t know, _kidnap me?_ ”

“WE DON’T WANT TO TAKE YOU ANYWHERE AGAINST YOUR WILL,” Sans asserts firmly, and you think there might be more to this kid than what meets the eye. “WE WERE HOPING TO NEGOTIATE WITH YOU SO THAT YOU WOULD COME WITH US OF YOUR OWN CHOICE.”

“m’brother’s right,” Papyrus says, standing from his place on the couch and heading over to you. “we don’ wanna fight you, because we _can’t_. you saw what y’ did to sans’ fingers. we might be strong ‘n powerful, but human magic beats that ev’ry time.”

“RIGHT, WHICH IS WHY WE WANT TO BE _ALLIES!_ WE ONLY ASK THAT YOU HELP US OUT FROM TIME TO TIME, AND IN RETURN I WILL _PERSONALLY_ ENSURE THAT YOU WILL BE _EXTRAVAGANTLY_ COMPENSATED!”

You unfold a folding chair and sit down, face in your hands.

“What’s the catch for this sort of thing?” you finally ask.

“no puttin’ shields around monsters or blockin’ us in anywhere,” Papyrus supplies. “use your magic only when we tell ya to, no tellin’ other humans ya have magic, no tellin’ other _monsters_ ya have magic, an’ no tellin’ other humans ‘r monsters ‘bout our arrangement either.”

“AND WE WOULD ASK YOU TO MOVE TO OTTAWA, NEAR WHERE THE NEW EMBASSY IS LOCATED,” Sans adds. “PAPY CAN HELP YOU WITH MOVING YOUR THINGS WITH HIS SHORTCUTS.”

“I _own_ this house,” you point out, gesturing with your arm to the messy kitchen surrounding you. “I’ve got to keep up with the mortgage payments and bills and stuff. I can’t exactly just pack up and _leave_.”

“… YOU COULD SELL IT?”

“I’m actually a bit attached to it,” you sigh. “Nora grew up here, and I love the amount of space she has to run around in the back yard. An apartment in Ottawa, even a really _nice_ one, isn’t going to have that for her.”

“WE CAN FIND A NICE PLACE THAT SUITS THAT REQUIREMENT, I’M SURE!”

“we don’t gotta worry ‘bout all the details tonight, but if it boils down to it i can jus’ ferry ya back an’ forth daily if needed.”

“Okay, back up a second – I haven’t agreed to _anything_ yet,” you clarify, standing from your chair. “ _And_ I barely even know you guys, _and_ I’m _still_ a bit ticked off that you barged in on my life all of a sudden and cost me my new job. I’d been struggling for _two years_ before I got that damn position.”

“maybe we could talk more ‘bout it over dinner?” Papyrus offers. “we’re buyin’.”

Well, you _are_ pretty hungry, so he practically read your mind with that one. And now that things have calmed down a bit, maybe these monsters aren’t so bad after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For a more visual depiction of what happened to Sans' fingers (I feel like I did a crap job at explaining it just because it's messy to put to words), check out this image I found off Google here:
> 
> <https://farm5.static.flickr.com/4858/45852425505_9757862f36_b.jpg>
> 
> ... And apply it to his middle three proximal phalanges. _Yeouch_.


	6. The Condition.

You didn’t want to have to get dressed properly to go anywhere fancy, so you insisted on takeout that Russ went to get (after insisting that you just call him that or Mutt). That left you and Sans alone for a few minutes while his brother went to get your orders from a nearby shawarma place that was pretty good.

“You’re seriously _twenty-nine?_ ” you chuckle, pulling at wires behind your small TV. “I never would have guessed.”

“WHY IS THAT SO HARD TO BELIEVE?”

“I dunno, you have this like, youthful energy about you or something?” you explain. “I’m surprised you’re even out of your teens. Then again, it’s my first time at guessing a skeleton monster’s age.”

“DOES IT BOTHER YOU?”

You look up from what you’re doing to eye him quizzically. “Why would it?”

He glances away from your gaze as his cheekbones briefly tint dark blue. “NO PARTICULAR REASON.”

“Well, I just thought we wouldn’t really be able to connect at the same level, maybe?” you point out. “I mean if you were a teenager there wouldn’t be a whole lot we could talk about.”

“THIRTY-TWO ISN’T _THAT_ OLD,” Sans reassures you.

“I keep trying to tell myself that,” you chuckle. “Alright, I think I’ve got this hooked up. What do you like to watch?”

You figured that if you’re going to dine in with the skeletons, you might as well put something on the TV for background noise.

“WHATEVER YOU WANT TO WATCH IS ACCEPTABLE,” he says.

“Do you think you’d mind if I put on a later season of a longer series? Or would it bother you to not have any context for what’s going on?” you ask as you start up the old XBOX 360. You don’t have a working desktop computer or a cable to make the older TV work with your laptop, so you figure you’ll just open up YouTube or a browser or something on the console instead.

“MAYBE START FROM THE BEGINNING?”

“Yeah, alright.”

You start up YouTube and find a Red vs Blue playlist that seems to have the whole series, so you start from season one. Russ comes back with your food and you eagerly hop on the far right seat of your couch, hitting the lever to recline and getting comfortable.

Russ sees you recline on one side of the couch and he immediately takes the far left, leaving Sans in the middle. He finds a similar lever on his side, but it doesn’t do anything when he hits it. He looks deeply disappointed that he can’t put his feet up like you did.

“Oh yeah, that side’s broken,” you inform him.

“lame,” he grumbles. “i’ll have ta fix that.”

As everyone begins to eat an almost companionable silence falls over the room. Sans seems interested in the show and asks a couple of questions about it, and you fill in him as best as you can.

“DO YOU HAVE THE VIDEO GAME THIS IS BASED ON?”

“Yeah, actually. I bought the anniversary edition forever ago.”

He looks at you, then at the TV. It’s like he wants to ask if he can play it?

“… Maybe if I had a second controller, we could play the campaign on co-op sometime,” you offer.

Sans doesn’t say anything to that, he just smiles.

The two skeleton brothers seem to get into the shenanigans going on in the machinima series, especially after the first few episodes as it ramps up.

You on the other hand are lost in your thoughts. After hurting Sans and bandaging him up, and the chill dinner and YouTube thing you’ve got going on right now, you’re finally coming around to accepting that maybe these guys aren’t… _Bad?_ You’ve never really interacted with monsters before, were always a bit indifferent to them when you heard they popped out of the ground a couple of months ago, kind of thought it was a big hoax until you started seeing them around in public.

But Russ and Sans are just like… _People_. Strangers, sure. Dangerous, probably. But they really seem to mean you no harm. Nora’s even chilled out around them, she’s stretched across yours and Sans’ laps watching you eat intently in case any scraps fall that she can steal, and you trust the ordinarily nervous chihuahua’s judgement more than your own.

And you’re surprised that you’re actually considering their offer. It needs work, and it sounds like they haven’t really thought too far ahead (since they don’t exactly have a job for you to work or somewhere lined up for you to stay yet), but you could probably negotiate with them. They seem willing to accommodate you as best as they can.

Why is that, anyways? Is it just because human mages are rare, or perhaps dangerous to monsters? The fact that they refuse to actually fight you, and desperately want you on their side, is a bit… Awkward? Especially with how rushed this whole situation is. It’s hard to judge ulterior motives when you don’t have all of the information. You know there are gaps in your understanding when it comes to your shields, especially where it concerns monsters.

You pause the show between episodes and Sans abruptly turns to you, almost _offended_ as he was really getting into it. You offer him an apologetic smile.

“Sorry, I just thought that maybe we should talk about this job thing,” you tell them.

Russ, who had finished his food and promptly slouched as far down as he could and shut his eyes, opens one socket to look at you.

“I’m considering… Taking your offer,” you groan at yourself. “Normally I would rather be independent and find my own way, but thinking about it, it’s _really hard_ to find a good IT job in this city, and I don’t really _love_ my career anyways. So, maybe this is an opportunity for me to try something new. Help others in a more meaningful way,” you explain. “But, I have conditions.”

“let’s hear ‘em,” Russ invites.

“For starters, I recognize that you don’t want me to use my magic against monsters or where anybody could see it, but I’m going to push back on that because I want to maintain my autonomy,” you tell them. “Now, obviously, my shields thing is a secret so I’m not about to start doing that in public because that’d screw me over too, but if I’m threatened by someone, human _or_ monster, then I’m going to defend myself by whatever means necessary, with shields as a last resort.”

Sans holds his bandaged hand with his other for a moment fairly delicately, then he nods. “OUR PLAN IS TO PROTECT YOU SO THAT IT DOESN’T COME TO THAT, BUT THAT IS FAIR,” he concedes.

“Second, I think that… If we found the right place… _Maybe_ I’d be fine with moving back to Ottawa. I’m from there originally, it’s just… The city doesn’t have a _lot_ of great memories for me, and there might be people I could run into that could cause a problem if I was back,” you point out.

“what part o’ town ‘r you from?” Russ asks.

“The east end.”

“then we’ll jus’ have ta find a nice place in th’ west,” he smirks.

“That helps,” you sigh, relieved. “Last thing; I want you guys to help me understand my shields thing better, if you can. Maybe help me with training them or something? I’ve been flying blind for years now and I feel like I only understand less than half of what there is to know about them. So, if you guys could fill in the gaps…”

“WE WANT TO KNOW MORE TOO, THAT’S WHY YOU’RE SO IMPORTANT TO US!” Sans enthusiastically agrees.

“’ve got some readin’ material back at th’ embassy y’ can take a look at. plus ‘m sure we can put our heads together an’ figure out more, if we work at it,” Russ adds.

“Alright, cool,” you relax. “Now, for what I can do for you guys-“

“y’ can help us with computer stuff an’ learnin’ ‘bout your shields, an’ mebbe protectin’ us monsters from time t’ time,” Russ interrupts. “tha’s all we really need.”

“I HAVE A CONDITION OF MY OWN TO ADD,” Sans pipes up. “IF WE FIND A SUITABLE PLACE FOR YOU TO INHABIT NEAR THE EMBASSY, THEN PAPY AND I SHOULD LIVE THERE WITH YOU AS WELL.”

You blink, surprised. “… You guys want to _live_ with me?”

Russ is even a bit taken aback. “um, bro-“

“THINK ABOUT IT FOR A MOMENT,” Sans charges on, turned towards his brother. “CURRENTLY WE DO NOT HAVE ANYWHERE TO LIVE APART FROM SHORTCUTTING TO THE UNDERGROUND AT NIGHT, AND I KNOW THAT IS TAXING ON YOUR MAGIC. IF WE ARE TO DEFEND THE EMBASSY THEN WE WILL NEED TO BE MUCH CLOSER TO ITS LOCATION ON THE SURFACE INSTEAD. THINK OF IT LIKE A FALLBACK POSITION,” he tells Russ, and you’re a little confused.

Sans turns to you next. “AS FOR YOU _____, IT WOULD BE MUCH MORE CONVENIENT TO TRAIN YOU _AND_ TO GUARD YOU IF YOU LIVE IN CLOSE PROXIMITY TO US, AND YOU WILL LIKELY BE TRAVELLING WITH US TO AND FROM THE EMBASSY FOR OUR TASKS REGULARLY ANYWAYS. YOU WILL OF COURSE HAVE YOUR PRIVACY AND MAY PUT YOUR SHIELDS AROUND YOUR ROOM TO THAT EFFECT, IF THAT IS WHAT HELPS YOU FEEL COMFORTABLE AND ACCLIMATE TO THE SHARED LIVING ARRANGEMENT.”

“… I think I need more than a minute to think about that,” you bargain. “I mean, first you offered me a job and now you want to be _roommates?_ ”

“… sans has good points,” Russ says plainly. “we don’ wanna get up in yer business, but it’d be easier ta keep ya safe if we know where ya are. an’ i don’t mean jus’ by yer _address_ , but knowin’ when you’re out ‘n about ‘n who yer with helps me track ya down an’ pop over if yer ever in trouble.”

“… Let’s watch some more of this series, alright?” you deflect. “I really need to think about this a bit.”


	7. The Kerchief.

You’re sitting at a polished solid mahogany desk with a two hundred dollar pen in your hand, stunned at how quickly your life has changed over the last week.

Once you’d agreed to the arrangement, the boys were quick to get to work. Sans went house shopping in Ottawa while Russ came to fix yours up so you could rent it out while you’re living out of town. He redid the tile in the kitchen and remodelled the upstairs bathroom entirely. You didn’t think it could be possible to do so much in such a short amount of time. You brought him breakfast and lunch while he worked and set about washing the walls and giving them fresh coats of paint to complete the newer look the house was taking on. He’d bring Sans over nightly and you would all have dinner together talking about your days.

Sans found a verifiable _mansion_ somewhere in the west end of Ottawa, and when you and Russ went to see it you fell immediately fell in love. The only problems you could see were the in ground swimming pool and the lack of a fence bordering the large property – both were hazards for an exploratory dog. Russ immediately calmed your nerves about it though, promising to get to work on an attractive fence to surround the back with and working out a solution to the pool. You don’t think Nora would go in there on her own, but she might fall in and you don’t know how good of a swimmer she would be – that dog _hates_ being wet. You resolved to just walk her on a leash or just watch her very carefully until both things were taken care of.

Then the real kick in the teeth was actually buying the mansion – apparently the jury’s out on whether or not monsters can actually own property, but _you_ could. So, they decided that they would pay for it, but _you’d_ have to sign the paperwork and be the title owner.

That’s where you are now – at the real estate lawyer’s office, about to sign a hundred documents spending Sans and Russ’ money on a second, _extravagantly_ expensive house, that _you_ would hold sole ownership over.

“I need… Like, a drink of water or something,” you struggle. “Can I just have a minute, please?”

You set the pen down and head out into the hall. There’s a water cooler you instantly take advantage of, filling a paper cone with ice cold filtered water, draining it, and then repeating the process twice. Then you sit on the carpeted floor next to it with your knees pulled in to your chest, fiddling with the empty cone.

Sans follows you out of the room, and sits down next to you once he sees you. “WHAT’S WRONG?”

“You guys are spending a _fortune_ on me and I feel incredibly overwhelmed and guilty,” you blurt out. “I feel like a bunch of dominoes just got knocked over in my brain. I have _no_ idea what I’m doing and kind of just want to run home and not have to deal with any of this.”

He interlaces his gloved hands in front of him thoughtfully – it turns out that he heals from his wounds rather quickly, so his injured hand hasn’t had to be splinted for a couple of days now – and takes a moment to think about what to say.

“I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO SAY,” he begins honestly, his indigo-blue eye lights flicking between focusing on your hand and your face. “EXCEPT THAT, I _WANT_ THIS. PAPYRUS AND I WOULDN’T HAVE SET THIS UP IF WE DIDN’T. SO, EVEN IF YOU’RE SCARED OF THE CHANGE, MAYBE JUST KNOW THAT IT’S NOT A _BAD_ CHANGE? AND THAT WE’RE HERE FOR YOU AND NORA EVERY STEP OF THE WAY.”

At that, you bury your eyes into your sleeve as you try and hold back a sob, eyes stinging with tears. How is he just… So _nice?_ So understanding and accepting of you and your fuckups, your metric ton of issues…

You feel something bump against your arm and you look up just as he tears begin to pour. Sans’ cheekbones are stained that dark blue, and he’s holding out that kerchief he’s always wearing around his neck, looking away.

“… I couldn’t.”

“IT’S JUST FABRIC, IT’LL WASH.”

Reluctantly, you take it and wipe at your face, trying to compose yourself once again. He stands up and offers you a hand to help you to your feet, and you take it. He grins at you and heads back into the room, but you stop to steal another cold drink from the cooler first, then crumple the cup and toss it in the nearby trash can.

If this whole thing falls apart somehow, you resolve to just donate the property to the embassy or something so that they didn’t waste their money on you. With renewed determination and a folded kerchief on your lap, you sign all the documents and have a date to get the keys to your new house.


	8. The Meeting.

You’re nervous as Papyrus and Sans bring you to the new monster embassy. It’s an old building in downtown Ottawa – just a nondescript brown brick building with three floors and a fire escape connecting the top two by a couple of boarded up windows. The entrance has some impressive steel double-doors that seem a bit stiff to open when Papyrus pulls on the handle – it actually looks like a loading dock that’s been remodeled to an entryway. There’s a cardboard box on the ground next to some other trash that you don’t pay much mind to.

“jus’ be ready for _anythin’_ , darlin’,” Russ coos next to you. “her majesty’s moods can be a tad bit unpredictable.”

“You know, it _kinda_ feels like we should’ve gotten this out of the way _before_ Sans muscled me into buying a house with your money,” you grumble.

Russ chuckles, while Sans beams up at you confidently. “DON’T WORRY, _____! WE’LL TAKE THE LEAD ON THIS.”

“she’d never admit to ‘t but queen toriel likes us,” Russ winks. “we’ve gotcha covered.”

“Well, alright then,” you sigh, linking your arms with theirs. “Escort away.”

… It still astounds you how quickly you’ve become accustomed to trusting them with your safety.

The skeleton brothers bring you through some half-renovated hallways and rooms, and you see signs of the building having been abandoned for quite some time before the monsters scooped it up. Wet spots on old dirty rugs that have been pulled up, a bathroom missing a door with black between the tiles and all the fixtures taken out, there’s even a large room you pass through still with old graffiti on the walls and a mess of dirty blankets kicked into one corner. If you didn’t have Sans and Russ with you, you might be running for the hills. This place looks like a squat house for homeless folks… Or, maybe a set for a low-budget horror flick.

But there are also plenty of signs that they’re fixing it up in places too. Boxes stacked of new flooring here and there, plastic sheeting and cans of paint and painting tools, some newer furniture stacked into corners to be moved into place when ready. It’s just brand new to them, so they’ve got to put the work in to make it look inhabitable again. And as you climb the stairs with them to the second floor, the conditions seem to improve. These walls are freshly painted, the rug is soft and plush, and the light fixtures in the ceiling are casting a warm light on everything.

Sans unhooks his arm from yours with a small, apologetic nod, as he clears his throat and steps ahead of you to the last door in the hallway. He knocks on a massive dark wooden door sharply twice.

“ _Enter_ ,” a voice calls out.

He flashes you and Russ a grin as he pushes open the door.

Behind it is a very large office, and you take a moment to gape at it. The windows are high on the walls, still boarded up pending replacement, but the rest of the room shows signs that this was probably finished first. The dark hardwood floor has a thick, scarlet-red carpet filling most of the room, with a symbol in gold you don’t recognize. There are shelves of books lining one side of the room with a classic grey stone fireplace in the middle, and along another are brand new filing cabinets behind a large desk that was clearly custom-made for the monster sitting at it.

It’s the Queen, whom you met briefly during the aftermath of that bus crash. Her robes are the same colours and have the same symbol as the over-large area rug, and there is a battered gold crown sitting on her desk by her large furry hand (paw?). She taps her claws against the wood casually as she sizes up the three of you, having now entered the room with Sans and Russ.

Both of them kneel before her, and you instantly feel uncomfortable standing by yourself, unsure of what to do. Sure, you’ve agreed to try and help them out, but does that mean bowing to the monster queen too? You don’t even know this person.

She flashes some yellowed sharp teeth in a smile… Or a grimace? It’s hard to tell. “So this is the human you were talking about? _Well done_ ,” she purrs.

Then she waves her other paw (hand??) in the air, and a giant red bastard sword seemingly appears from nothing. She places her crown on her head, and takes a stance.

“Human, prepare to _die_.”

You frantically flail as she moves _incredibly_ fast towards you, holding your hands out hoping for a shield. You close your eyes as you hear a clatter, then open them as you feel hard arms pulling you backwards from either side. The first thing you see is your shield – you were successful at not only stopping her attack, but you caught the red sword _in_ the shield itself – and the second thing you see is the two skeleton brothers standing to either side and slightly ahead of you, crouched low in combat stances as they summon magic weapons of their own.

You catch you breath. “What the _HELL!?_ ” you scream

Toriel grunts as she tries to dislodge her weapon. “You would _dare_ to defy ME, your _Queen!?_ ”

She’s very clearly talking to the skeletons, not you.

“yer majesty, listen-“

You pull at the energy well in your stomach and build a shield all the way around yourself to stop anything from getting in. “Did you guys know she was going to try and _KILL_ _me?!_ ” you demand.

“ _NO!_ ” Sans cries out, glancing between you and his monarch. He drops to a kneel, but keeps a sharp summoned bone in a hand behind him. “QUEEN TORIEL, _WHY_ -“

“ _We must **kill** that human so as to ensure that we are **never** imprisoned again!_” she screams, snarling and foaming at the mouth. She’s gone completely unhinged.

“I would never DO that!” you protest from the safety of your barrier.

“ _LIES!_ ”

“Uh, g-guys? Is this a bad time?”

All four of you turn to see the fish lady with the glasses, standing in the open doorway. She’s holding a large cardboard box in her hands.

“I m-mean, if you’re all busy k- _killing_ each other,“ she stutters, surveying the scene. “I could c-come back later.”

“ _WHAT IS IT!?_ ” Toriel bellows with an emotion somewhere beyond total fury.

The fins on the sides of her head fall sheepishly even as she presses on. “W-well, I got a call that this package came for us, b-but I didn’t order anything. P-Papyrus, did you-?”

“no,” Russ answers quickly.

“… S-Sans?”

You perk up. “Where did you get that box?”

“Just outside, next to the pile of crap Paps left,” she sneers. “B-but I don’t know what that has to do with _you_ , _human!_ ”

You hold out your hands and quickly wrap the box she’s holding in a shield, hoping you’re wrong. She hisses as it rises away from her, sending a scathing glare at Russ.

“s’ not me,” he says, standing up straight and walking over to you. “what is it?”

“Oh my gods I _hope_ I’m wrong, but… Listen, _how_ many enemies do you guys _have?_ ” you ask.

“TECHNICALLY, ALL OF HUMANITY,” Sans stands next to you as well, inspecting the box curiously.

“Russ, do you think you could shortcut this box somewhere way far away, like an empty field or the ocean or something?” you ask nervously.

He eyes you suspiciously. “why? what’s th’ matter wit’ it?”

“… I th-think it might be a _bomb_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oops.


	9. The Bomb.

Everyone in the room recoils away from you as soon as the word leaves your mouth.

“Y-yeah,” you stutter nervously, left standing with the box hovering in front of you. “That’s a bit closer to the reaction I was expecting.”

Sans stands from behind Toriel’s desk where he was ducked behind. “COULD YOUR BARRIERS CONTAIN AN EXPLOSION?”

“I have NO idea and I _really_ don’t think this is the day to figure that out,” you answer back. “Russ, how about that shortcut?”

He shakes his head no. “i can’t do nothing to ‘t while you’ve got that shield ‘round it, an’ if i were t’ take it somewhere i’d have to go wit’ it.”

“This could be some human trick,” Toriel seethes. “How are we to know you are not trying to deceive us, _human?_ ”

“I used to work for the government, and they teach you about stuff like this,” you explain. “A suspicious, unmarked package left by a government building? Yeah, that screams ‘probable bomb threat’ to me.”

Undyne’s peeking around the large door to the room where she’s chosen to take cover. “B-but I got a call about it,” she argues. “They s-said they were UPS.”

“But you didn’t order anything, right? And I’m guessing neither did anyone else,” you reason. “I’m wondering if you only got a call because the box hadn’t been moved in a while, and someone was watching it waiting for you to bring it inside.”

“… can ya disarm it?”

“I don’t know that much about bombs!” you fire back. Sure, you feel marginally safer inside your shield and with it contained inside of a shield, but you have never had to try and contain an explosion with them before! “I don’t know what triggers it, I’m _shaking_ too much to even listen for _ticking_ or something, and I’m not even sure I’m comfortable standing this close to it even _with_ my shields!”

“okay darlin’, ya need to calm down, maybe we can-“

You jerk backwards as the box suddenly makes a sound.

You feel the heat of it on your face first, instantly causing you to break out into a sweat. Then you feel a concussive force against your middle. You stagger away from it, falling onto the floor cushioned only by your shield and the rug. And you look up and watch.

The box incinerates itself inside a shield the same size and shape of the original size of the box, but none of the fire or shrapnel contained in it manages to escape. Just the heat and enough of a blow to knock you over.

But other than the bruise you might have on your ass, you and everyone else in the room, are completely unharmed.

“… YOU DID IT.”

Sans and Russ are at your side instantly, and you drop your shield to let them in so they can help you up. Sans holds your face as he looks you over for any injuries, his purplish-blue eye lights looking bigger and brighter than usual in worry.

Russ looks over the wreckage in the other still remaining shield. “i don’ think there’s enough left in there t’ pose any further threat,” he reasons.

“Oh thank _fuck_ ,” you breathe. “Can we get _out_ of here?”

Sans takes your hands in his and looks over at Russ.

He shakes his head. “sorry darlin’, but we’ve still got a lot left t’ resolve here. for starters, yer majesty,” he addresses Toriel. “why’re you tryin’ ta dust our human? _____ doesn’ mean no one any harm.”

Toriel seethes at the challenge to her authority. “Humans with magic are a _danger_ to us and our _freedom_ ,” she counters. “They are a _threat_ and must be eliminated upon discovery. I _thought_ that was why you suggested that you seek _this_ one out in the _first place!_ ”

“y’ jus’ said t’ _find_ her,” he smirks. “not what happens once we do.”

“WE ALSO CONSIDERED THAT A MAGE ON _OUR_ SIDE COULD BE A FORMIDABLE ALLY,” Sans beams, clutching one of your hands in his. “THINK OF THE POSSIBILITIES, YOUR MAJESTY! WITH TRAINING, SHE COULD HELP US CREATE A _NEW_ BARRIER THAT KEEPS OUR ENEMIES OUT AND ALLOWS MONSTERS TO PASS FREELY!”

“y’ saw how she jus’ protected us from a _bomb_ , yeah?” Russ adds. “tha’s a talent we can use.”

“I mean, I know I basically agreed to all of this but I can’t help but think maybe your hopes for me are a bit high,” you point out anxiously.

Toriel presses a paw against her forehead, as if in terrible pain. “The risks involved _far_ outweigh any sort of reward. She is a _human_ and _cannot_ be trusted, and that is the _end_ of it. Now, if you are both done _bargaining_ for her _pathetic life_ , I would like to return to _ending_ it.”

You step back and create another shield as she summons her glowing red sword again. Sans squeezes your hand and summons a sharpened femur in his other, ready to defend you.

Russ casually strides between you and the Queen with his hands slid into his pockets.

“jus’ one other thing y’ might wanna consider,” he drawls. “if ya dust our human, sans n’ i are dust too.”

Toriel stops. “ _Excuse me?_ ”

“one other bit ‘f information i forgot to mention, is that _____ here ‘s m’ brother’s soulmate.”

“… _WHAT?!_ ”

Honestly? _Same_. Since when the hell are you soulmates with _Sans?_ Are soulmates some kind of monster thing?

Sans glances up at you accusingly and immediately drops your hand as if suddenly disgusted by it, stepping back away from you. He turns to glare at Russ’ back.

“an’ y’ know if i lose m’ brother, my fragile health will fail an’ i’ll dust soon after,” Russ continues. “so, if y’ fancy th’ idea of losin’ yer number one _an’_ yer number two, then go ahead an’ _try_.”

Toriel’s lips are parted, snarling at you past Russ’ head.

Then, her sword disappears, her cloak whipping about her as she turns abruptly away.

“… _Get out of my sight_.”

“’course, yer majesty.”

Russ lazily salutes her back, then looks over his shoulder at you and Sans, gesturing with his shoulder to follow him.


	10. The Fight.

“What did you want to eat for dinner?”

“I’M FINE, THANK YOU.”

Sans has been… _Colder_ to you, since Russ announced to everybody that you and him are supposedly _soulmates_. He’s set up an office space for himself in one of the many spare rooms in the house they bought for you and buried himself in his work, refusing to come out for meal times or to even look at you or his brother.

He’s not taking it well, that’s for certain, but you wish he’d at least _talk_ to someone about it. It doesn’t _have_ to be you.

“… Are you fine if I just bring you something in a bit?”

“WHATEVER,” he waves dismissively at you without looking up.

“… Alright.”

The door latches into place as you close it behind you, sighing.

Your stomach hurts. It’s been hurting for at least a week now. It feels like someone’s reached their hand in and twisted it up on you.

Russ says that’s because Sans is rejecting you, although neither of you can get him to open up as to why. It feels a _little_ better when you hang out with Russ, though – he’s been trying to keep you in the loop as best as he can now, after both you and Sans chewed him the hell out the night you met Toriel for the first time. You’ve been working with him on setting ‘permissions’ on your barriers – allowing certain things, and certain types of souls, to pass through it or be denied specifically. You managed to create some small fences for Nora around the backyard and a shield to cover the pool with, so, it’s going okay.

But Sans is _far_ from okay.

“Why did you have to open your big mouth, anyways?” you corner Russ later that night.

“’bout what?”

“About him and me being _soulmates_ or whatever!” you snap back. “He’s been shut away in that room ever since and he won’t talk to _anybody!_ ”

Russ smirks. “y’ miss ‘im, don’t ya?”

“ _Yes_ , but that’s not the point!” you huff. “Look, I didn’t _want_ a soulmate either and I don’t even particularly want one _now_ if it’s going to be like _this!_ If anything I just want things to go back to _normal!_ ”

He frowns slightly as he offers you a takeout tray. You both decided on a rotisserie chicken restaurant tonight, largely because pizza and shawarma are getting boring. “jus’ keep tryin’, darlin’. he can’t stay holed up in there forever.”

“At this rate he just might.”

“then, at least take ‘im some food so he doesn’ starve,” he winks.

Scoffing, you take the offered food and turn to head upstairs. Thinking better about it, you grab your own tray of food to take with you as well. Nora follows hot on your heels in order to beg.

You knock gently on the office door as you open it to let him know you’re coming in. Setting Sans’ food and a drink down on the desk beside him, you step back and pull a chair across the floor briefly before sitting down.

He holds his head as if he has a migraine. His sockets are squinted as he turns to you. “WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE?”

You shrug, having already begun stuffing your face. You’re not sure if it’s the food hitting your stomach or if it’s just his proximity, but that ache below your sternum is starting to feel better already. Nora stands against your knee and you slip her a tiny piece of chicken.

“I live here,” you finally say after swallowing your food. “How is your hand?”

“BETTER,” he mutters, flexing his phalanges. He had you remove the barriers the day after you moved in, insisting he was already healed. Russ said it had something to do with Sans’ boss monster talent, but he didn’t give you too much detail.

“I’m glad,” you say sincerely, before cutting at another piece of chicken and stuffing it in your mouth.

He stares you down for another second, and then huffs as he pushes away from the desk to turn and glower at you. “WHAT DO YOU _WANT, HUMAN?_ ” he demands.

“You know my name,” you fire back.

His sharp teeth are displayed in a pained grimace, holding his head again. “ANSWER THE QUESTION,” he says, halfway to shouting. Nora startles at the outburst and you put your hand on her to give her some sense of safety and support.

“I want to know what’s going through your head lately,” you charge. “I want to know why you won’t leave this room or talk to anyone. What is going _on_ with you Sans? Why are you avoiding _everyone?_ ”

He grits his teeth and turns back to the desk, grabbing his pen again. “I AM INUNDATED WITH WORK AND NEED TO FOCUS. THAT IS ALL,” he says sharply.

“Great, so let’s talk about work then,” you say, standing abruptly and setting your food aside. You step over to him to look at the diagrams he’s been making for the embassy’s security plan. “No one’s given me any direction on what I should be doing right now, so if you’ve got something I can start on-“

“ _GET AWAY FROM ME!_ ”

He thrusts his arm out at you, intending to push you away, but you catch him in a shield instead. He jerks in surprise when his arm is frozen in mid-air. You take hold of his forearm as you let the magic shatter away into nothing, holding on tight as he looks up at you.

He looks so… Scared? _Betrayed_.

Sans pulls his arm away, leaning away from you as he stands. He closes his eye sockets and takes a breath to focus himself, then opens them narrowed angrily at you.

“I DON’T WANT _YOU_ ANYWHERE _NEAR_ ME, _HUMAN_.”

“Well, it _was your_ idea for us to _live_ together-“

“I DON’T _CARE!_ ” he shouts. “IF I HAD KNOWN THAT- IF _MUTT_ HAD _SAID_ WE WERE, UGH, _SOULMATES_ BEFOREHAND, I _NEVER_ WOULD HAVE SUGGESTED IT IN THE _FIRST_ PLACE!”

“Why is that such a _problem_ for you?!”

“ _BECAUSE I NEVER **WANTED** A SOULMATE!_” he spits. “I HAVE SPENT MY _ENTIRE LIFE_ WORKING TO SECURE MY POSITION IN THE ROYAL GUARD, BECAUSE **_THAT_** _WAS MY **DREAM!**_ NOT WHATEVER **_THIS_** _IS!_ ”

His expression is completely manic. He’s struggling to get the words out he’s so furious beyond belief.

“Well **_I_** didn’t want a ‘soulmate’ _either! Especially_ not one that treats me like _you_ do!” you fire back. “We were fine as friends and then as soon as your brother opens his _damn mouth_ about it’s like I’m public enemy number one! But I’ve been saying since the _very beginning_ that I didn’t want **_any_** of this _at all!_ ”

“THEN WHY ARE YOU IN HERE _BOTHERING_ _ME!?_ ”

“I don’t _know_ , okay? I don’t know _why_ I give _two **shits**_ about you when you try and talk me down and call me ‘ _human’_ like that’s supposed to be some _huge insult!_ I just thought it’d do you some good to _talk_ to someone, it doesn’t have to be _me!_ I don’t even **_want_** it to be me with the way _you’ve_ been acting!”

You reach into your pocket and pull out some balled up fabric. “I _also_ wanted to give this back to you, but you’ve been so _hostile_ lately that I didn’t want to spend more than _ten seconds_ in a _room_ with you to _return_ it!”

You throw it on his stupid security plan. It’s the kerchief he loaned you at the lawyer’s office. Sans squints at it, then he bares his teeth at you again.

“GET _OUT!_ JUST GET OUT OF MY _SIGHT!_ ” he screeches.

“Couldn’t get out of here faster if I wanted to. Let’s go, Nora,” you say, grabbing your food and ushering the cowering dog with your foot.

He slams the door shut behind you and it shudders on its hinges for a split second.

“… damn.”

You yelp as you nearly crash into Russ with a tray of open food.

“ _tha’_ couldn’ve gone worse, huh?”

He was listening? “Just… Get out of my way and leave me alone,” you huff, taking off down the hall before he can see you burst into tears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off, I want to start by thanking you guys in taking an interest in this new fic of mine, but I have a confession to make: This isn't my best work. Not by a longshot. I am not putting in even a quarter of the effort I usually put into one of my Not Your _____ fics and I know it's coming through my writing a bit.
> 
> But the point of this one is to just practice not caring about perfection, and to just get the story told. I barely know what that story is myself yet but I'm going to tell it. Even if it feels super clumsy or half-baked at times. I'm not deeply researching anything that gets put in here (like how embassies or immigration or bombs actually work) and I'm kicking the main plot off within the first ten chapters instead of giving you eighty delicious fluff chapters first before I deliver the hard-hitting developments way later. This fic would be like if I tried to pull an R. L. Stine and just write down my dreams as they were and throw them at a publishing company, with all of the skewed dream logic intact and completely bypassing an editor to check if it even reads. The point with this story isn't to tell it perfectly - it's to _tell it._
> 
> I still do a fair bit of re-reading and editing but not half as much as I used to, and I'm telling myself that that's okay. The problem I think with my other fics is that I hold myself to a higher standard than even I can reach with them as they are now, and I feel like there is a lot of expectation for the same quality of writing and level of effort in them for the people that read them. Like, I set up a sexy scene in Underfell and left it hanging for over a year before finally getting into the exact right mindset to finish it off, and now I'm stuck on just what exactly should follow that and am torn between three different ideas.
> 
> So again, thank you for taking the time to read this fic and write your lovely comments on it, even though it isn't up to my usual standard. That's part of the point :P So if you see any flaws in my writing of this fic or in any of the characters' actions, assume it's either some crazy good foreshadowing (lol), or that something is vague just for the sake of being vague and not a glaring plot hole or something. Also please just forgive me for not deep diving into research for anything that comes up that's out of my depth, I'm largely just an IT person IRL but I have knowledge gaps in my own field even.


	11. The Drunk.

You’ve settled in on the couch for a cozy night of ice cream and an RvB marathon, Nora passed out on your lap. You pause it when she suddenly stands up at attention and cries at the nearby front door. A moment later, it opens.

“THIS IS OUR _HOUSE??_ ”

Confused why Sans would be confused by that, you turn and see Russ carrying the smaller skeleton limply on his back. He enters and turns around to kick the door closed, then starts kicking off his boots. Nora hops off the couch and chirps, dancing around his feet waiting for her greeting

“PAPY, IT’S _SOO NICE!_ WE HAVE A REALLY, _REALLY_ NICE HOUSE.”

… What the hell?

Nora races back to hop up on the couch and sit on the arm, waiting impatiently for Russ to come over so she can kiss his entire face. You’re not entirely over your shouting match with Sans earlier, so you’re hesitant to address them and find out what’s going on.

But it seems like Russ has decided to involve you anyways, as he heads over to the couch to drop Sans off across from you, Nora sneaking some kisses in on both of their faces where she can. She seems to flinch away from Sans’ hand for a moment, but then he very gently pets the top of her head, his eye lights big with fascination at the tiny dog’s foldable ears. He takes each one very delicately in his gloved hands, stands them up, then lets her drop them down and back again, and he snorts a soft laugh as she sneezes.

“enjoy this while it lasts,” Russ nods towards you.

“Russ, what the hell did you do?” you demand.

“got ‘im drunk,” he chuckles. “he needed t’ loosen up a bit. won’ last forever though, his tolerance ‘s shit but he sobers up quick.”

… Oh _gods_.

“ _Russ_ …”

“’m off to bed. night you two,” he waves, leaving the room and heading upstairs.

… _Gods damnit_ Russ.

You turn back to look at Sans, who has turned and buried his face into the cushions of the couch. You see a lot of dark blue on his cheekbones.

“… Sans, are you okay?” you ask. You kind of don’t even want to ask, but knowing that Russ got him wasted you’re a bit concerned about his health.

“I CAN’T LOOK AT YOU,” he mumbles against the plush surface.

Is it because of what happened earlier? “Why not?” you ask.

“YOU’RE REALLY CUTE,” he confesses, his whole body squirming into the cushions.

“… Sans, how much did you have to drink tonight?” you decide to ask. Might as well have an idea of how far gone he is.

“UM… IS A BOTTLE OF CABEN… CABERN… IS A BOTTLE OF WINE A LOT?”

You blink. “… Yes.”

“REALLY??”

“Yes, that is a lot.”

“OHH… I HAD TWO.”

… _Son of a bitch_.

“Sans, look at me.”

He glances from the cushion at you, then he hides his face again. “I _CAN’T!_ YOU’RE _STILL_ CUTE!” he accuses.

“ _Sans_.”

“OKAY MAYBE IF I CLOSE MY EYES IT’LL BE FINE,” he negotiates.

Then he turns towards you with his gloved hands pressed firmly over his eye sockets. Nora seizes the opportunity to kiss him on the mouth.

“AUGH! _NO!_ I AM UNDER ATTACK!” he squirms away.

“ _Nora_ , go lay down,” you bark at the small dog.

She gives you a sad look, but you snap your fingers at her and she hops off the couch to go jump up on the nearby loveseat instead. Once she’s settled in, you turn your attention back to Sans.

“I FEEL _REALLY WEIRD_ ,” he says, slouching into the couch a bit, his eyes still closed but his face is more relaxed. “BUT THIS IS COMFY AND THERE’S A CUTE GIRL HERE, SO I THINK I’LL JUST TAKE A LITTLE NAP…”

“Sans, you’re drunk.”

“NO I’M NOT, I’M SANS,” he grins broadly.

You sigh. “I mean that it’s probably not a good idea for you to fall asleep like that.”

“I’LL BE _FIIINE_. MY MAGIC WILL FIX IT ANYWAYS,” he yawns.

He’s so out of it and you’re not sure what to even do here. Asking rational questions or asking how he feels about earlier doesn’t seem like it’s going to get you very far.

“What do you mean your magic will fix it?”

“OH, I’M NOT SUPPOSED TO TELL ANYONE BECAUSE IT’S A SECRET,” he pouts. “I’M SUPPOSED TO BE _TOUGH_ , Y’KNOW, AND BE, OR LIKE, _LOOK_ STRONGER THAN I REALLY AM, OR HAVE TO BE A JERK TO PEOPLE SOMETIMES. BUT IT’S HARD SOMETIMES. SOMETIMES I JUST WANT TO GO BACK TO BED…”

“Sans…”

He peeks at you with an eye socket, scanning your face with a tiny indigo eye light, then he closes it and smiles. “YOU’RE REALLY CUTE STILL. CAN WE BE FRIENDS?”

“… I kind of figured we already _were_ friends,” you sigh. “But then again, you can’t even seem to _look_ at me right now.”

“SMALL DOSES ARE OKAY,” he says, peeking at you again.

Then he slowly starts to roll over, and bury his face into the cushion again.

Then his shoulders shake as if he’s sobbing.

“… Sans?”

“DON’T LOOK AT ME.” He’s definitely crying. His voice is high and shaky.

“Are you okay?”

“I’M SUCH A _JERK_ , I _HATE_ IT.”

“… Can you talk to me about it?”

“I CAN’T.”

“… Can you try?”

“I CAN… OKAY, _MAYBE_ I CAN DO THAT,” he says reluctantly, turning towards you.

He takes off his indigo kerchief from around his neck and wipes his face with it, then turns his body so that he’s laying down on the couch, but with his skull on the middle seat almost touching your leg.

You don’t really know what to do with a sad, drunk little skeleton with tears at the corners of his sockets looking up at you like this. You’re still kinda mad with him. Do you try to touch him, comfort him? Will he jerk away again? Or would that be taking advantage of the situation, since he’s obviously not behaving like himself?

… You resolve to just put your hand over his previously injured one, and he immediately takes it in his. He sniffles and wipes at his face with the other, but cracks a smile as he’s now fully looking up at you.

“WOW, YOU’RE REALLY BEAUTIFUL,” he hums quietly to himself.

“… Are you ready to try talking?” you ask.

He looks sad again, shuddering and sniffling. “I’M… I’M SORRY,” he begins, sounding small. “I WAS A REAL JERK TO YOU… I DON’T WANT TO BE, THOUGH. NOT WITH YOU.”

It’s nice to hear him apologize, but you don’t know how much of this is sincere, or how much he’s even going to remember. “Can you give me some more? Like, why do you feel like you need to be a jerk?”

“SUR _VI_ VAL,” he says, setting the kerchief on his chest and idly fiddling with your hair. “MONSTERS ARE REALLY MEAN TO EACH OTHER, SO I HAVE TO BE MEAN BACK, SO THEY WON’T HURT US.”

“I don’t think I was being mean to you though, was I?” you ask. Sure, you gave as good as you got back in his office earlier this evening, but you initially only offered him food and an opportunity to talk to you about what’s been going on with him.

“NO, NO! YOU’RE REALLY CUTE AND NICE,” he smiles faintly, fixated on your hair. “I’M JUST… I’M JUST _SCARED_. I DON’T LIKE IT.”

“… Are you scared about having a soulmate?”

He gasps in wonderment. “I HAVE A _SOULMATE??_ WHO IS IT?”

You sigh. “Me, apparently.”

“OH! OH _WOW!_ ”

He abruptly rolls over onto his chest, but with how clumsy two bottles of wine has made him you’re worried he’s going to roll right off the couch, so you have to lean forward and catch him to keep him steady. He’s still wearing his armour so he’s heavier than he looks.

But once you’ve got him steady he’s seated on his knees next to you, his hands on your face and nearly nose-to-nasal passage close. His indigo eye lights are still big in wonderment and his cheeks are stained that dark purplish-blue.

“I’M SO LUCKY,” he says dreamily. “I’VE NEVER _HAD_ A SOULMATE BEFORE, AND… AND I GET _YOU?_ ”

“Okay, slow down there a second,” you stop him, putting your hands over his to remove them from your face. As flattering as this all is… “We just had a fight earlier about this. Do you remember that?”

He looks down and frowns. “I WAS REALLY MEAN TO YOU. I’M SORRY…”

“You said you were mad because you didn’t want a soulmate,” you point out. “I’m not a fan of the idea either, but-“

“YOU’RE _NOT??_ ”

“… Can you explain to me what it is about being soulmates that you hate so much?”

“WELL… I NEVER REALLY WANTED TO HAVE KIDS UNTIL NOW.”

…

…

“ ** _WHAT?!_** ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter was his Fell side, welcome to his warm cuddly Swap side :)


	12. The Bedtime.

That broke you. You’ve been trying to be the rational adult this whole time, but Sans has officially blown apart your fragile composure. _HE WANTS TO HAVE **KIDS?!**_

He just charges on, still half out of it and looking at you dreamily. “BUT I THINK IF YOU’RE MY SOULMATE MAYBE OUR KIDS WILL BE AS CUTE AS YOU ARE,” he beams warmly at you.

“Okay whoa wait, _stop_ ,” you say, dropping his hands. “I need a minute.”

“OKAY.”

… So, soulmates means kids for him? Is that the case for every monster that meets their soulmate? Wait, would you and Sans having kids even work? You’re a human and he’s a skeleton – he probably doesn’t even have a…

You curl into a ball and resist screaming into your hands. You just thought about Sans’ _dick_ , or possible lack of one, and that’s got you all hot and bothered all of a sudden. This whole evening has just been _completely_ derailed.

“Okay, wait-“

“WAITING. HAS IT BEEN ONE MINUTE?”

“So like, can humans and monsters even _have_ kids?”

He thinks about that for a second. “I DON’T KNOW,” he admits. “BUT I THINK SOULMATES ARE SUPPOSED TO HAVE KIDS USUALLY. OH, BUT IT’S REALLY DANGEROUS TO HAVE KIDS! WE SHOULD BE REALLY CAREFUL.”

“… Why is it dangerous to have kids?”

“BECAUSE OTHER MONSTERS MIGHT SEE THEM AS FREE EXP,” he explains, and you’re utterly lost as to what that means. “THEY COULD BE TARGETED AND GET HURT, OR WORSE.”

“… I really don’t know that much about your society, now that I think about it,” you highlight. “It sounds like monsters are awful to each other though, if you’re worried about theoretical kids or if you had to be a jerk to survive.”

“… THE SURFACE IS SO MUCH BETTER NOW,” he admits. “I MEAN, BUS CRASHES AND BOMBS ASIDE. MAYBE WE _COULD_ HAVE KIDS!”

You put your face in your hands. “Maybe that’s a sign that we should go to bed,” you suggest.

“RIGHT! I’VE HEARD THAT’S HOW WE GET STARTED!” he grins, taking your hands in his and locking his excited eye lights on yours. “YOUR BED OR MINE?”

Your cheeks _boil_ as all of your blood races to them, jerking your hands away as he nearly topples over into your lap. “NO! Oh _gods_ , that is _so_ not what I meant,” you fluster. “I meant that you’re tired and you should probably _sleep_.”

“… OKAY, MAYBE ANOTHER TIME? I NEED TO FIGURE OUT HOW IT WORKS, ANYWAYS. I’VE NEVER EVEN _KISSED_ ANYONE BEFORE, LET ALONE HAD _KIDS!_ ” he confesses.

… There are some things to unpack there, and you just want to get to sleep. Maybe you can address that in the morning. Then again, _hopefully not_.

You take the blanket off your lap and offer your hand for one of his, which he obliges quickly. Pulling his arm over your shoulder, you help him stand up from the couch and walk upstairs.

He sits on the bed as you try and figure out how to get him out of his armour – he certainly can’t _sleep_ in it, can he? Once you manage to get the shoulders and chest pieces off he takes off his battered old t-shirt with a logo so faded you can’t even make out what it is, but then as you’re working on the knee pieces he grabs onto _your_ shirt and attempts to remove it from you as well.

You grab the bottom of it and pull it back down firmly, glaring at him.

“ _No._ ”

“AWW.”

Once he’s down to his pants (which he _also_ tries to remove in front of you – at that point you just throw his blanket on him and walk away), he tucks himself into bed and rolls onto his side facing away from you.

“HEY WAIT- CUTE SOULMATE??”

You stop and turn at the door. “Yes, Sans? What do you need?”

He’s turned to face you, blankets clutched up against his exposed collarbone. “WILL YOU… WILL YOU STILL BE HERE IN THE MORNING?” he asks worriedly. “EVEN THOUGH I WAS A JERK TO YOU?”

You sigh, leaning against the doorframe. “Yeah, I mean I live here too after all.”

“OKAY GOOD,” he yawns tiredly, rolling away again. “I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE.”

“Good night, Sans,” you tell him, flicking off his light.

“GOOD NIGHT CUTE HUMAN,” he mumbles away from you.

Closing the door as softly as you can behind you, you turn to head for your own room down the hall.

Only to bump nose-first into Russ’ chest, as seems to be becoming a trend in your relationship with the tall brother.

“ _Russ!_ ” you scold.

“did ‘e open up to ya?” he drawls.

You fold your arms and huff. “Sort of. He said he was sorry but I don’t know how much he’s going to remember from tonight.”

“everythin’, probably,” Russ shrugs.

You cover your face with your hands, hoping he can’t see the immediate flush that overtakes your whole face.

“what happened,” he asks, a knowing grin in his words.

“Listen… What’s his dating experience like, for real?” you ask.

“… why?”

“He said he’s never even _kissed_ anybody.”

“tha’s true, in spite o’ my best efforts,” he rumbles with a laugh. “kept tryin’ to introduce him t’ girls in his teens but he refused. tried introducin’ him to guys next, same result. said he’s too busy an’ i know he don’t trust easy. ‘s why i’m all for ‘im gettin’ sweet on ya. i know he can be, he’s jus’ stuck in ‘is ways.”

“… You think maybe you could have a talk with him about soulmate stuff? _I_ don’t really care personally, I’m not sure I want anything to do with it, but like… He doesn’t seem to understand how it’s supposed to work, I guess.”

“… what did he say?” Russ says, straightening his posture. “spill it.”

“It’s _embarrassing_.”

“i _definitely_ wanna hear it, then,” he grins.

You roll your eyes and sigh, leaning in. “He said that he thinks soulmates are supposed to, uhm… Have _babies_ , or something,” you whisper.

Russ’ sockets blink.

“pffft… hahahaha!”

“Russ, _shush!_ He _just_ went to _sleep!_ ”

“oh my angel, haha!” he continues cackling like the infuriating skeleton he is. “okay okay, you got it darlin’… ehehe, that’s too good… okay, first thing t’morrow, i’ll tell m’ brother all about the monster birds ‘n bees.”

“Oh, _gods_.”

He chuckles to himself as he starts to head down the hall. You decide that you’re at your capacity for nonsense today anyways, so you head the other way to your own room.

“hey, _____.”

You turn.

Russ is leaning against the railing to the staircase, a devilish smile crossing his sharp face.

“once ‘m done givin’ sans a monster sex talk, _yer_ welcome fer a lesson or two o’ yer _own_ ,” he winks.

“GODS, just- _Go to bed, Russ!_ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Admittedly I had way too much fun with drunk SF!Sans. This might have to happen again.


	13. The Store.

The next morning you’re warming up some leftover food for breakfast when Sans saunters into the kitchen to get some food of his own. He takes one look at you, his entire face flushes a purplish navy blue, apparently remembering what he said and how he was acting last night.

Then he immediately turns on the spot, marching away with a haste that makes you wonder if he’s going off to pack his things and leave the country altogether.

“Uhm, Sans?” you call out.

He freezes in place and reluctantly turns his head a single degree to look at you from the corner of an eye socket.

“… I’m going shopping today, I was wondering if you’d like to come with me,” you offer awkwardly. “We have basically no food that isn’t greasy leftovers, so I wanted to stock up on some stuff.”

“… THERE IS A GROCERY STORE A COUPLE BLOCKS AWAY, I AM SURE YOU CAN MANAGE ON YOUR OWN,” he evades.

“Well, normally I _would_ , but I didn’t want to just buy stuff for _me_ ,” you sigh. “And I don’t know what you or Russ actually like. Plus, it’s probably going to be too much for me to carry back on my own.”

“AND WHERE IS MY LAYABOUT BROTHER THIS MORNING?” he asks, still not having turned to face you properly.

“He left early to do some more renovation work at the embassy.”

His shoulders rise slightly and he lets out a heavy sigh, then he turns and folds his arms behind him. “… VERY WELL THEN, I SUPPOSE IT FALLS TO _ME_ TO ESCORT YOU FOR THIS ERRAND.”

“You know, you _could_ just say ‘fine, I’ll go shopping with you’ like a normal person,” you tease him.

He grits his sharp teeth trying to think of a good comeback, but apparently can’t muster one up this morning and he sighs, shoulders falling. “JUST… TELL ME WHEN YOU ARE READY TO LEAVE,” he says resignedly.

“Sure thing.”

* * *

You’re not sure if the silence is comfortable or _un_ comfortable on the walk over, but it’s _something_ alright. You kind of want to say something, but you don’t know what.

“… How did you sleep last night?”

“FINE. … HOW ABOUT YOU?”

“Yeah, I slept alright.”

…

…

“Nice weather, eh?”

“YEAH, IT’S WARM.”

…

…

“Any plans for today?”

“JUST WORK. YOU?”

“Shopping is about it, actually.”

…

…

 _Finally_ , you’re at the store.

It’s one of the more posh chains of grocery stores, and therefore more expensive. Luckily, you just got the first & last months’ rent from your new tenants for your old house, and Russ recently sent you too much when you said you had bills to cover, so you’re prepared for a bit of a spending spree.

You can already feel dozens of eyes on you and Sans when you go to grab a cart at the entrance. Hopefully this won’t take too long.

“First thing I need is some baking supplies,” you tell him. “I’m out of sugar and chocolate chips so I can’t make cookies until I have those.”

“YOU’RE MAKING COOKIES?”

“Yeah, I thought it’d be good to snack on. Is there a particular kind you like?”

“WHATEVER YOU’RE MAKING IS FINE, I’M SURE.”

“We’re here for you and your brother too, you know – feel free to chime in with what you want.”

Next you hit the frozen section. You were pretty much out of frozen vegetables before the move, so you grab a couple bags of peas and corn and toss them in the cart, then decide to just browse and see if Sans points out anything in particular. You spot a box of chicken wings you like so you throw that in, then you see him eyeing some pizza pockets, so you grab a couple different kinds of those for him to try. Last you grab a big pack of waffles for easy breakfast and then a fresh tub of ice cream, since you polished off the last of it last night.

On your way back to the front of the store with the bakery, produce, and meat sections, you grab a couple bricks of cheese, garlic butter, and some yogurt on for a steal. You also grab some chips and dip, just because it’s been a while since you’ve had it.

“I kind of want to get back into cooking,” you tell your short skeleton companion. “I have way too much time to kill as it is, so it’d be nice to teach myself how to cook something new.”

“… I’VE NEVER LEARNED HOW TO COOK,” Sans reveals. “WOULD YOU… NO, NEVERMIND.”

“… Do you want to ask if I’ll teach you how?”

“ONLY IF IT’S NOT A BURDEN ON YOU.”

“Feel free to join me in the kitchen when I’m cooking, alright? I’ll do my best to show you how it’s done.”

“OKAY… THANKS,” he mutters, blushing blue.

You grab some bakery essentials – buns, bread, some muffins, and some chocolate croissants – and then head for the veggies. You just want a small bag of potatoes for now, mindful of the fact that you have to carry all of this back two blocks in the summer sun. Finally, you hit the meat section.

“Oh, _crab_.”

Sans eyes you suspiciously. “SOMETHING WRONG?”

You point out the bunker with king crab legs on special. ‘On special’ of course meaning ‘still forty dollars per pound’, but it’s one of your favourite foods and it’s been _forever_ since you could afford it.

You pick up one of the clear plastic packages and weigh it in your hand. “I should just get _one_ , maybe…” you hum to yourself.

Sans seems to figure out that what you’re holding is food, and he grabs a second package, gives it a quick inspection, and piles it into the cart. “… WE SHOULD GET TWO,” he declares. “PAPY AND I WILL WANT TO TRY IT.”

… Yeah, that’s fair. You smile as you put more into the cart.

Ground beef, chicken breasts, and some juicy-looking thick steaks later, you decide to line up with the cart.

“You know, it doesn’t feel like we have enough in here for three people,” you point out, the cart only just over halfway full. “You could’ve pointed out more things you’d like to try, you know.”

“MY BROTHER AND I ARE STILL GROWING ACCUSTOMED TO LIFE ON THE SURFACE,” he offers as an explanation. “WE ARE UNFAMILIAR WITH A LOT OF HUMAN CUISINE AS A RESULT.”

“Well, I don’t mind giving you some new things to try, I guess. What did you guys even eat underg-“

“Can you _believe_ that a monster like that would think he’s _welcome_ here? What is he even doing in _this_ neighbourhood?”

“Ma’am, I make minimum wage.”

You suddenly tune in to the conversation the lady at the register ahead of you is having with the cashier. You look over at Sans, who has noticed what’s going on as well, but while his teeth are grit he doesn’t seem to want to say anything.

“You should call a supervisor to get him out of here.”

“I’m just trying to do my job, ma’am.”

“He’s ruining the image of this store!”

“Listen up you racist old _hag_ ,” you cut out sharply. “Sans is here because he _lives_ here.”

She gapes as she turns to you, glaring daggers at your audacity for interrupting her. “I find that hard to _believe_ , young lady. And ‘monsters’ aren’t a race,” she insists.

“He could buy this entire _store_ if he damn well _wanted_ to,” you counter. “He could _buy you_.”

She doesn’t seem to have a response to that, just makes scoffing and huffing noises as she gathers up her purse and turns her nose up at you and the cashier, leaving the store with all her items still on the belt. The guy at the register sighs, moving them out of the way into a basket at his feet as you move up and start unloading your cart.

“Sorry I cost you a customer,” you offer meekly.

“She had three expired coupons and insisted on talking at me when I had a line,” he shrugs. “If anything you did me a favour.”

You move to the end to start bagging the groceries in your durable reusable tote bags. He announces the total and Sans cuts in front of you with his card out.

“Sans, I was going to pay,” you protest.

“NO, I’LL GET IT. APPARENTLY I COULD BUY THE ENTIRE STORE IF I WANTED TO,” he boasts, flashing you a handsome smirk.


	14. The Restart.

“I don’t even know why I _said_ that,” you chuckle. “I just wanted to get that pretentious old bag to shut up. I wasn’t trying to make you buy the groceries.”

Sans shrugs, seemingly in a better mood than he was this morning as he hands you the ice cream to put away. “I DON’T MIND. I HAD PLANNED TO ANYWAYS.”

“Why? The whole trip was my idea.”

“… ‘SOULMATES’ ASIDE,” he looks away, blushing slightly. “PAPY AND I _DID_ PROMISE WE WOULD TAKE CARE OF YOU.”

“Well, you didn’t need to _also_ haul everything home by yourself. I could have gotten a bag or two.”

“THEY WERE HEAVY, AND I WANTED TO.”

…

…

“This is so awkward. Is there any chance we can start over?”

“… HOW DO YOU MEAN?”

“I don’t _know_ ,” you sigh, shutting the fridge and sitting down on one of the barstools by the island. “I don’t actually know what I want, that’s basically my whole problem with my life right now. I don’t know what I want to do, or where I want to be, I’m just living life day to day and I don’t really have a strong pull towards doing _anything_ beyond just getting _by_. It’s like, I’m waiting for a purpose, something to live for or strive for, to just drop in my lap someday, but I don’t know that I would know it for what it was if it ever actually _did_.”

“And I _really_ wasn’t expecting a soulmate relationship either,” you add as he takes a seat across from you. “I was pretty against starting a new relationship at all. Like, I _really_ don’t know how to feel about all that. Is _that_ what I’ve been waiting for? Then why don’t I _want_ it?”

“Sorry if this isn’t something you want to hear from your soulmate,” you add weakly.

“NO, IT’S FINE. IF ANYTHING, I’VE BEEN FEELING THE SAME WAY,” Sans reveals.

“I ACHIEVED MY PRIMARY PURPOSE VERY RECENTLY, IN FACT. I WANTED TO BECOME CAPTAIN OF THE ROYAL GUARD, MAYBE EVEN A GENERAL, EVEN THOUGH THERE HASN’T BEEN ONE SINCE THE WAR. I DIDN’T GET QUITE WHAT I WANTED BUT I GOT SOMETHING CLOSE TO IT THAT SUITED ME BETTER – A TITLE, RECOGNITION, AND A PRESTIGIOUS PLACE IN THE ROYAL GUARD. I HAVE EVERYTHING I EVER WANTED. … SO, _NOW_ WHAT? I JUST… LIVE MY LIFE, DAY TO DAY? WHAT ELSE CAN I STRIVE FOR WHEN I’M _ALREADY_ AT THE TOP?”

“IN THE UNDERGROUND, IT WAS EXTREMELY DIFFICULT TO TRUST OTHERS - IF YOU SHOWED YOUR BACK TO ANYONE YOU’D BE _SURE_ TO FIND A KNIFE TWISTING IN IT. AND COMPETITION FOR THE GUARD WAS CUTTHROAT; I WAS ABSORBED IN MY TRAINING AND IN FINDING WAYS TO PROVE MYSELF WORTHY OF THE POSITION. SO, I NEVER MADE TIME FOR RELATIONSHIPS, NEVER FELT I WAS MISSING OUT ON ANYTHING EITHER.”

“BUT THEN, ONE DAY I FIND OUT I HAVE A _SOULMATE_ ,” he blushes, but his eye lights are fixated on his interlaced gloved fingers in front of him. “SO, WHAT, I’M SUPPOSED TO JUST… GET _MARRIED??_ HAVE _KIDS?_ I NEVER _WANTED_ THAT BEFORE. WHAT AM I _SUPPOSED_ TO DO?”

“Gods, I wish I had an answer for both of us,” you smile weakly.

“UM... MAYBE IT WOULD BE WORTH KNOWING… HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT ME?” he asks, his blush darkening as he timidly looks up at you.

“Short guys _usually_ aren’t my type,” you grin. “But, you’re cute, and charming in your own way, I’ll give you that. I feel like I want to get to know you better. I don’t know if that’s the soulmate thing or a genuine feeling of my own, but I think it could be fun to spend some more time together, playing video games together or watching more dorky shows on YouTube.”

“Also,” you add after a moment. “I think you actually care about me for _me_. I don’t think I’ve genuinely ever _had_ that before. I’ve been the trophy gamer girlfriend a couple of times and it’s _not_ fun. I swore off relationships entirely primarily because of jerks who would like that – I _hate_ being objectified.”

“THAT’S AWFUL!”

“Right? Uh, anyways… Sorry. Didn’t mean to dredge up old baggage.”

“… I HAVE THIS INSTINCT TO PROTECT YOU,” he starts. “EVEN THOUGH I KNOW YOU’RE MORE THAN CAPABLE OF PROTECTING YOURSELF, I WANT TO ANYWAYS. I ALSO THINK YOU’RE… _UM_ ,” he hesitates, looking away and clearing his nonexistent throat. “I _AM_ PHYSICALLY ATTRACTED TO YOU, ALTHOUGH I’M NOT QUITE SURE _WHY_.”

“Harsh.”

His head whips back around. “SORRY. I JUST MEAN THAT… I’VE NEVER BEEN ESPECIALLY ATTRACTED TO ANYONE LIKE I AM WITH YOU, SO I DON’T KNOW IF THAT’S COMING FROM _ME_ , OR COMING FROM THE FACT THAT WE’RE SOULMATES.”

“It’s sort of like, your instincts, or your _soul_ is telling you one thing, but your logical brain is going ‘ _whoa_ , hold on a second, _what?_ ’”

“YES! THAT’S _EXACTLY_ _IT!_ ”

“Well, at least we’re pretty much on the same page there,” you smile.

He smiles softly at you. “MAYBE WE CAN’T START OVER NECESSARILY, BUT INSTEAD, MAYBE WE CAN START FROM STANDING ON EQUAL GROUND.”

“Soulmate, you read my mind.”

“DO YOU… WANT TO WATCH SOMETHING ON TV TOGETHER, MAYBE?” he suggests.

“Of course. There’s like seventeen seasons of RvB, you know. Shit gets _way weirder_ than robots and ghosts.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oops I tripped and some of my current personal baggage fell out. Oh well, I'll have Russ swoop in and sort them out fairly soon, maybe. Probably one of my better chapters of this train wreck though :P I'm all about that _communication_ and those _feelings talks_. YEAHH!


	15. The Break.

“You look like you could use a break.”

“DON’T ENCOURAGE HIM – HE TAKES MORE THAN _ENOUGH_ BREAKS.”

Mutt climbs to his feet and stretches. He’s been putting in hardwood flooring on the main floor of the new embassy all day, and he’s just about three-quarters of the way done.

“Want some food?” you offer, holding out a tote bag of some packed lunch containers. “Sans wanted to stop by and I figured I’d tag along in case either of you needed anything.”

“i could eat,” he grins, accepting the bag. “thanks darlin’.”

“Don’t mention it.”

“EXCUSE ME _____, PAPY,” Sans bows slightly, then heads past you both with a long cardboard tube in hand.

Mutt decides to take a sit against the adjacent wall with the bag, and you decide to sit beside him on the fresh hardwood floor. “you two seem t’ be gettin’ along,” he smirks, unpacking the bag. You’ve made him some sub sandwiches to munch on.

“We talked it out and then hung out for a bit,” you shrug. “It was nice.”

“ _sooo_ , what’re ya namin’ the _kiiids?_ ”

“ _Russ!_ ”

You swat at him and he chuckles.

“What did you even tell him this morning? He was pretty flustered when he came downstairs.”

“jus’ the birds n’ bees, like i said.”

“That’s it?”

“with diagrams,” he winks.

You gape, then your face turns bright pink. “Oh my _gods_.”

“what? jus’ thought my li’l bro’s ought to make his soulmate feel good, ‘s all,” he cackles. “also gave him some videos t’ watch fer research.”

“You are the worst person in existence. I can’t even _believe_ you,” you sigh heavily.

“fer serious, darlin’,” he prods. “how’re you holdin’ up wit’ th’ soulmate business?”

“We’re doing okay, I guess,” you admit. “But neither of us really know what we’re _supposed_ to be doing, if anything? It wasn’t in either of our plans to even be in a relationship to begin with. I enjoy hanging out with him and spending time together and getting to know each other, but like…” you pause, then fix him with a serious look. “What are soulmates _supposed_ to do? How is this supposed to work? And no jokes.”

He chuckles at the severe look you’re fixing him with. “jus’ be together, i figure. i don’ ‘ave a soulmate so far as i know, so i can’t tell ya what it’s supposed t’ be like. i’s supposed t’ work like a regular relationship, i figure? jus’ it feels more natural, like ya can trust each other wit’ yer very _souls_ if it came down to it.”

You look down at your belly and hold a hand over it. Mutt figures you already know that’s the center of your power, and the location where your soul sits, if you’ve already gotten skilled with your magic.

“oh,” he adds. “there’s also soulbondin’.”

“… Soulbonding?”

“yeah. soulmates ‘r supposed t’ bond their souls together, i heard. i’s like marriage only ten times stronger. you share yer memories, yer essence, even yer magic through a bond. y’ can always tell where yer bonded is, and y’ know as soon as they’re in trouble so y’ can go help them.”

“… That’s an enormous step,” you balk. “I don’t know if we’ll ever get that far.”

“i know sans isn’ a fan of it,” Mutt points out. “he’s got a lot o’ memories ‘e wouldn’t like sharin’.”

“Same, honestly. … Sorry, by the way.”

He raises a bony brow. “what for?”

“I realized I could have been helping you with security and renovations over the last week or so, but I’m… _Kind_ of avoiding Queen Toriel right now,” you reveal, pulling your knees into your chest.

“yer not th’ only one,” he nods towards the stairs.

Sans is coming back down them, looking very much like someone who’s seen some shit.

“… DID EITHER OF YOU _HEAR_ ANY OF THAT?” he asks cautiously.

“We were busy talking too. What’s up?”

“OH, _GOOD_ ,” he sighs, relieved. “I MAY HAVE JUST GOTTEN THE LAMBASTING OF A LIFETIME. BUT, GOOD NEWS – THE SECURITY PLAN HAS BEEN APPROVED.”

“Well hey, at least now we can get started.”

You climb back to your feet as Mutt continues eating the sandwich you brought him, watching you follow Sans back up the stairs as he starts pointing out camera placements and areas that need a reinforcing barrier.

“It’s a lot easier to send cables _down_ than to have to fish them _up_ through walls…” you begin to say, turning the corner and disappearing from sight.

Mutt sighs, holding a hand over the open space below his sternum, where his soul begins to protest once again. He knows it’s not a stomach ache, since he lacks a stomach _to_ ache, but he still doesn’t quite understand.

Finding your soulmate is supposed to be exceedingly rare, and you’re only supposed to have _one_. So, why is _he_ getting the pins and needles pains that Sans had when you weren’t talking for near a week? You’re _Sans’_ soulmate, not _his_.

He also thought it was supposed to feel _stronger_ than this…

Well, _whatever_ , Mutt resolves. Sans deserves you more than he does, and he knows his bro will make you happy. He might be a bit slow to _bed_ you though, which... No, he should just stay out of it.

Sighing softly, he wipes his hands on his work pants and stands again. Keeping busy is helping to distract him from unreasonable fantasies like being your soulmate too.

* * *

“… _Whoa_.”

“WHAT’S WRONG?”

“Did either of you _feel_ that?” you ask, grabbing onto Sans’ shoulders for protection.

“th’ cold emptiness of th’ void between?” Russ teases you. “that weren’t yer first shortcut through it, darlin’.”

“… _____? ARE YOU ALRIGHT?” Sans asks, putting his hand over one of yours.

“When we went through that shortcut just now, it felt like something was… I don’t know, _calling out to me?_ Does that make _any_ sense to either of you?”

“… NO,” Sans says, looking up at Russ apprehensively. “I’VE NEVER EXPERIENCED THAT.”

“…sometimes th’ void does funny things to yer mind,” Russ admits thoughtfully. “ya gotta be careful wit’ i. jus’ remember it’s a _void_ – an empty place o’ nothin’. the mind don’ like the feelin’ o’ nothin’, an’ it makes up ideas ‘bout it havin’ somethin’ to pull ya in. never let go when we’re shortcuttin’ around, an’ never listen to it callin’ for ya – it’s not real, a’right?”

“… Okay,” you sigh, feeling a bit more at ease with his explanation. “I must’ve just imagined it then. Still,” you add. “I think for the time being I’d rather walk places if I can, or take a bus? Just until I can… Forget that _ever_ happened.”

“WE CAN AFFORD TO TAKE A CAB TO AND FROM THE EMBASSY DAILY IF IT WOULD BE MORE COMFORTABLE FOR YOU,” Sans offers.

“Yeah, maybe just for a few days. We don’t want to establish any travel patterns those dickheads can use, right?”

“RIGHT,” he grins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm too fast at writing chapters for this still, I guess. Anyways, you should check out [this post I made on Tumblr](https://ladyanatares.tumblr.com/post/190356549850/possible-dub-con-elements-upcoming-in-not-your-bus) and go comment on it maybe. I can confirm right now that chapters with dubious content **will** have a big bold warning at the top to let you know what's coming up. I don't want to trigger anybody with my writing ever and normally I would have everybody consenting and happy with each other, but... Well, it'll make more sense once we get there.


	16. The Crab.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time for crab.

“Crab is already cooked when you buy it frozen like this,” you explain, shaking off some clumps of ice crystals from the claws and shoulders before you drop them into the pot. “So really we’re just warming it up. From once this starts boiling, twenty minutes should be plenty to make sure it’s cooked through.”

Sans is holding one of the claws in his hands, inspecting it curiously. “WHAT SORT OF CREATURE _IS_ A CRAB? I’VE NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE IT.”

“They’re bottom-feeders that live in the ocean usually. These ones are king crab, which are caught up by Alaska. The colder the water, the bigger they get, I think.”

“INTERESTING,” he hums.

“There are a lot of different varieties of crab, some of them even come up on land, like beaches and stuff. There’s only a couple of kinds that we eat, though.”

The pot begins to bubble as the water continues to heat up, so you set an oven timer for twenty minutes.

“WHY DO THEY SELL THE CRAB PRE-COOKED?” he asks. “CAN WE NOT COOK IT OURSELVES?”

“Only if you like getting pinched by those giant claws,” you say, holding your hand out for the one he’s holding. He hands it over with some mild apprehension. “These claws could _easily_ snip off your fingers.”

“GEEZ!”

You chuckle, tossing the last claw in the pot. “Crab and lobster, which is another bottom-feeding crustacean like crab and tastes similar, both have to be boiled alive basically in order for them to taste good. If you kill a crab or a lobster _before_ boiling it, you can ruin the meat.”

“YOU SAID THAT WE WERE EATING THE LEGS AND SHOULDERS OF THE CRAB? WHAT ABOUT THE _REST_ OF IT?”

“Oh, there’s a big middle section of the crab that you can’t eat – here, I’ll pull up an article about it,” you say, taking out your phone to Google it. “See this round centre part? That’s where all its organs are – brains, heart, stomach, intestines – whatever it is crabs get. And pretty much all of it is toxic, so we throw that middle part away. There are some small bits of okay meat in the shoulder, but that’s as high up as we go.”

“FASCINATING.” He does seem genuinely fascinated.

“Sorry there isn’t much you can help with for dinner tonight,” you apologize. “I just kind of want to crash with my favourite food and not have to do anything too complicated tonight.”

“YOU’RE STILL ANXIOUS ABOUT THE SHORTCUT EARLIER,” Sans observes.

“ _Yeah_ ,” you shudder, crossing your body and gripping your arms as if a chill just ran through you. “I _know_ Russ said it’s all in my head, but… I just need a couple of days,” you resign. “Then I’ll forget about it and be all back to normal.”

“WE’LL KEEP YOU SAFE NO MATTER WHAT. … EVEN _IF_ IT’S ALL IN YOUR HEAD,” Sans smirks.

“You _little_ \- _Come here!_ ”

You grip him in a headlock and gently noogie the top of his skull while he cackles.

“We _could_ catch a couple episodes of RvB before we start on the instant mashed potatoes,” you offer, letting him go.

“OKAY, I’LL SET UP THE TV WHILE YOU LET NORA OUT?”

The small dog is sitting at your ankles, grumbling at you.

“Sounds like a plan.”

* * *

“We should get spotlights for our backyard,” you point out. “Oh, don’t take your eyes off that pot. It’ll boil up really quickly and can boil over and make a big mess.”

“RIGHT!”

You figured you’d give Sans a more hands-on approach to making your boxed mashed potatoes by letting him be in charge of it. It’s also pretty easy to make, but pretty easy to mess up too if you’re not paying attention. He’s got a wire whisk that he’s stirring the water, milk, and butter mixture with.

“Sorry, spotlights – I’m blind as a bat at night,” you point out. “And my dog is all black. But, if I had some light shining on the yard it’d be easier to watch her when she goes out at night.”

“WE CAN ASK RUSS IF HE CAN SET SOMETHING UP?” he offers, indigo eye lights still fixed on the pot.

“It’s only August, so there’s no rush yet. We’ve got sun until eight o’clock at night basically,” you shrug. “It’s just one of those things I had set up at my house in London.”

“… DO YOU MISS YOUR OLD HOUSE?”

“Yes and no,” you sigh. “Yes because that’s just like… My _home_. I made it my own with the brand new appliances and the kitchen renovation my ex did and the paint we put on the walls in several rooms, and it had a big yard for Nora to prance around in where she could chase wild rabbits and trees to watch the squirrels bouncing around in.”

“BUT YOU _DO_ LIKE IT HERE, RIGHT?”

“ _Absolutely_ ,” you smile. “This place has an even bigger yard, the house is enormous and beautiful, I actually _love_ it. I guess I’m just a bit… _Intimidated_ by it?”

“INTIMIDATED _HOW?_ ”

“It’s just so _fancy_ ,” you chuckle at yourself. “Like, I’m the kind of person who just wants to play video games and bum around in my comfiest pajamas all day. I think I feel a bit… _Unworthy_ of living in a place as big and nice as this.”

“We’ve also only had the place a couple of weeks by now,” you add. “I don’t know, maybe I’ll acclimate over time. It’s just a big change.”

Sans turns slightly towards you, mouth open slightly with a question, but you notice the pot has started bubbling. You leap into action and grab the handle over his to pull it off the heat.

“That was a close one!” you laugh. “Now just dump the packet of potato flakes in and whisk it until it’s good and mixed.”

“… SORRY,” he mumbles. “I LOOKED AWAY.”

“No, it’s okay! I’m just glad we caught it in time. It’s _very_ fast.”

He follows your instructions to mix the potatoes while you throw the frozen corn kernels in the microwave for a minute.

“… IS THERE SOMETHING WE COULD DO HERE THAT WOULD MAKE YOU FEEL MORE AT HOME?” he offers. “LIKE THE LIGHTS IN THE YARD?”

You turn to him, the microwave whirring behind you. “Hmm? Oh, that would help. I’m not sure what else we could do though.”

“AT YOUR OLD HOUSE YOU SAID YOU BOUGHT NEW APPLIANCES, RENOVATED THE KITCHEN, AND PAINTED SEVERAL ROOMS,” he points out. “WE COULD DO THAT HERE?”

“ _Oh_ , I don’t _know_ … I mean, this place is _really_ fancy. I’d probably just dork it up somehow.”

He frowns at that. “IF ‘DORKING’ IT UP WOULD MAKE YOU FEEL MORE COMFORTABLE, THEN GO RIGHT AHEAD. THIS IS YOUR HOME TOO YOU KNOW.”

The microwave beeps behind you and you grab the container of previously frozen corn kernels and shake it around in the water, then put it back in for another minute. “… Dinner is almost ready. Let’s postpone this discussion for another time, okay?”

You’re not really up for an existential discussion on how to make a literal mansion feel like home to your otherwise broke ass right now, and thank goodness for Sans as he just smiles and nods, knowing that this subject is making you uncomfortable and is happy to give it a rest.

Once the potatoes have cooled slightly, the crab legs have been extricated from the hot water, and the corn has been drained, you and Sans put together your plates leaving some aside for Russ for when he gets home in a few minutes. He’s been working at the embassy later and more often you’ve noticed, but you didn’t want him to miss a meal as good as this.

“The first thing I like to do,” you explain, holding up the claw. “Is to bend the narrow side of this backwards as _far_ as it will go.”

You demonstrate for Sans and it makes a snap sound that makes him jump in his seat.

“Oh right,” you frown. “I should have braced you. We basically have to break the exoskeleton apart to get at the meat inside, so there’s going to be a _lot_ of snapping noises like that.”

You worry that maybe that will remind him of what you did to his hand the second time you met, but he has a look of realization on his face as he nods, snapping his own claw apart as well.

Relieved, you continue your instruction. “Now, that big white disc thing in the middle, that came out attached to it? That’s a tendon or something. It’s big and wide like that because the claws have so much power behind them. The thready white stuff clinging to it on either side, though? _That’s_ the meat, which is the part we eat.”

You start to pick at it and eat it with your fingers and Sans gives you a look.

“I TAKE IT THIS ISN’T A FOOD WE CAN EAT WITH A FORK AND KNIFE VERY EASILY.”

“Yeahh sorry, it tends to get a bit messy,” you apologize. “Now, the claw is pretty big and has a lot of meat inside, so to get at the rest of it, I’ll grab it in the palm of my hand and try and crush it to break the shell-“

Sans, following your instructions, puts the bulk of the claw in the palm of his hand, closes it, and crushes it one-handed. You gape at him as you’ve got both hands over yours.

“… You… Did that really _easily_ , huh?”

He jerks in surprise. “IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE DIFFICULT?”

You look down at the claw in your hands, then hold it out and offer it to him. “Do that again.”

He takes it, then crushes it in his palm like it’s a flimsy papier mache. Then he opens his hand and offers it back to you.

“… You’re _really_ strong,” you realize, sweeping the pieces of it out of his palm and back onto the corner of your plate. “Usually I need both hands and basically _all of my strength_ to just put a crack in it big enough that I can start to tear it apart.”

“… OH.”

An awkward silence falls over the both of you as you try to distract yourself by picking out the bits of shell from the meat.

“… ARE YOU AFRAID OF ME?”

You think about that for a moment, crab meat pinched in your fingertips stopped just shy of your open mouth. “… I don’t know how to feel about it right now, honestly. I just think I’m… Surprised, more than anything,” you admit.

And _maybe_ , just maybe _ever_ so faintly turned on.

He’s had that strength this whole time? You had no idea. Sure, he grabbed onto your arm that one time, but Sans is… _Small_. Adorable. _Distinctly_ non-threatening, at least as far as you’re concerned. Sharp teeth, spiky armour, and edgy attitude aside, you’ve never felt like you should feel afraid of him.

“… I’m not afraid of you,” you finally resolve. “I just had no idea you were that strong.”

“… _GOOD_. I’M GLAD,” he sighs, sounding relieved. “YOU KNOW, WHEN WE FIRST MET ON THE BUS, I WAS IRRITATED THAT YOU WEREN’T AFRAID OF ME, BECAUSE I FELT LIKE EVERYONE _SHOULD_ BE. BUT… JUST NOW, I WAS VERY WORRIED THAT YOU MIGHT BE… I DON’T WANT _YOU_ OF ALL PEOPLE TO FEAR ME.”

“Well, you _also_ kind of broke the first rule of eating crab Hercules,” you smirk. “You’re not supposed to _shatter_ the shells because then there’s tiny pieces that get lost in the meat, and those are not fun to bite down on. So, let’s try a leg segment next,” you say, raising one up from your plate.

He smiles softly and grabs one in his hands. “OKAY.”

“Now, grab either end in your hands like this, and _gently_ try to crack it in the middle by sort of… Bending it back and forth, like this. _Big_ emphasis on gently. If you’re too rough with it you’ll break the meat inside, which we want to come out in one piece because otherwise we’ll have to dig around in there and that’s less fun.”

“… SHOW ME FIRST?”

“Just like this, okay?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> XD Sorry for the crab-heavy chapter. Man it's been _forever_ since I've had crab legs D:
> 
> Maybe when I get a new job I'll have to go to a steakhouse and treat myself :P


	17. The Carry.

“she’s asleep?”

Mutt finds Sans in a rather compromising position.

After the two of you had eaten dinner together, you sat down on the couch to watch some more RvB together. But Nora curled up into your lap partway through an episode and passed out, and you soon followed her lead.

… And your head slid down the back of the couch to rest on Sans’ shoulder.

“… I DON’T WANT TO WAKE HER,” he rasps as softly as his voice can manage. “BUT, I _ALSO_ DON’T WANT TO REMAIN STUCK ON THE COUCH LIKE THIS.”

“shove ‘er over,” he suggests, shrugging.

“WHAT IF SHE WAKES UP?”

“then she wakes up,” he chuckles. “i’s not th’ end of th’ world if she does. maybe then she’ll go sleep in ‘er bed.”

“… CAN YOU SHORTCUT HER UP TO HER ROOM?”

Mutt clicks his jaw at that. “she said no shortcuttin’ fer a bit ‘cause it makes her uncomfortable. i don’ think she’d like it very much if i did that while she’s nappin’.”

“RIGHT, YOU’RE RIGHT,” Sans says, shaking his head. “IT WAS A BAD SUGGESTION AND I SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT BETTER OF IT.”

“’sides, she put a barrier ‘round ‘er room to keep us boys out, remember?”

“… OH, THAT’S RIGHT. I’VE NEVER TRIED TO OPEN HER DOOR BEFORE, SO IT SLIPPED MY MIND.”

… Mutt had tried. Once. He tsks mostly at himself.

“y’ could always carry ‘er upstairs yerself.”

He looks over at you and tries to quickly plan this out. “BETWEEN THE ANGLE SHE’S SITTING AT AND NORA PINNING DOWN HER LAP, THAT MIGHT BE DIFFICULT TO MANOUEVRE. … CAN YOU MAYBE DO IT?” he pleads.

Mutt comes around the couch, hands in the pockets of his jacket as he tilts his head to the side, observing the scene. Your mouth is partway open and your hair is falling everywhere. He decides to take out his phone.

“PAPY, DON’T-“

Too late. The picture is snapped and stored for safekeeping on his phone.

“wasn’ gunna pass that up,” he chuckles. Sans sighs and rolls his eye lights.

Then, he reaches down and scoops up a heavy and unwilling Nora. She snorts derisively at him, then has a huge yawn before snuggling in to rest against his shoulder with a small grumble.

“… i’ll bring this one upstairs for ya,” he says, nodding towards the small dog relaxed in his arms. “’m sure ya can manage th’ other one on yer own.”

“BUT,” Sans protests. “… I STILL COULDN’T BRING HER INTO HER ROOM WITH THE BARRIER.”

“so? bring ‘er to yours.”

“ _WHAT!_ ”

“ _Shh,_ ” you scold him sleepily, taking a long deep breath and grumbling as you settle back in on Sans’ shoulder. Heh, like mother like dog.

Sans checks on you, then scowls at Russ. “I COULDN’T TAKE HER TO _MY_ _BED_ , THAT’S- THAT’S _HIGHLY_ INAPPROPRIATE!” he grumbles at him, whisper-shouting as best as he can.

“i didn’ tell ya t’ put a bun in th’ oven,” Mutt cackles. “i jus’ said bring ‘er up so she can sleep in a bed.”

His little brother’s skull is engulfed in that dark indigo colour. He grits his teeth and brings a hand to his forehead. “THAT’S NOT- I’D _NEVER_ -!“

“seems like ya have two options, bro,” Mutt reasons, scratching Nora’s neck as she huffs again. “y’ can either bring ‘er to yer bed so she has a comfy place ta sleep, or, y’ can wake ‘er so she goes to ‘er own bed. the choice ‘s yours.”

He hooks a thumb behind him at the kitchen. “’m gunna grab some food while ya think it over.” Nora perks up at the mention of food. “food for _me_ , ya little rascal.”

“EVERYTHING IS COLD BY NOW,” Sans scolds, turning his head just enough so he can see Mutt over the top of the couch. “… WHY _ARE_ YOU HOME SO LATE, ANYWAYS? HAVE YOU BEEN AVOIDING US?”

“jus’ keepin’ busy.”

“YOU _HATE_ WORKING HARD, THOUGH.”

“th’ embassy’s comin’ together nice, jus’ sorta eager to get it over an’ done wit’, maybe.”

“PAPY, WHAT’S _WRONG_.”

The troubled tone his little brother says that in causes Mutt to stop and sigh.

“… listen, bro,” he begins to explain. “i don’ wanna get between you an’ yer soulmate, ‘s all. maybe if ya _hadn’t_ been soulmates, i’d ‘ve… tried _courtin’_ _____ m’self. i jus’, don’ wanna make it more complicated than i’ already is.”

Sans seems to let out a relieved sigh at that. “IS THAT ALL IT IS?” he observes. “WELL, I CAN’T BLAME YOU. SHE’S VERY…”

“sexy, curvy, utterly tantalizin’ in _all_ th’ right ways?”

His little bro scoffs, offended and darkly blushing again. “I’LL ACCEPT THAT YOU ARE ATTRACTED TO ____ AS WELL, BUT _PLEASE_ KEEP YOUR VULGAR FANTASIES TO YOURSELF.”

He chuckles at that. “jus’ don’ be surprised if they become _your_ fantasies too later down th’ line,” he winks.

Sans huffs again. Mutt finishes plating himself some dinner one-handed, then heads for the stairs to carry it up to his room.

“… i’ll leave ya to yer decision, then. night bro.”

His decision… _Right_.

How to get out from under you while also ensuring you have a good night’s rest on a proper bed.

He’s surprised at himself when he realizes that he actually _would_ like to try carrying you bridal style. He’s not used to being physical with others, preferring to keep a professional distance in all of his relationships, save for the rare embrace for his brother when things became difficult Underground.

But that changed with you, somehow. He didn’t even notice it until well after the fact.

He wanted you to gently look after and tend to his wounded fingers, so he let you.

He wanted you to have his kerchief when you were crying and feeling overwhelmed, so he gave it to you.

He wanted to link arms with you like a gentleman courting a lady, so he did that too. He’s also held your hand at least half a dozen times since meeting you.

He wanted to take off your shirt when he’d had too much to drink… He blushes furiously at the memory. Apparently he’s _far_ too bold when wine is muting his regular inhibitions.

He wanted to _kiss_ you that night too… He’s wanted to kiss you at _least_ a dozen times, actually. Just to see what it was like, just to find out how soft your lips are against his hard skull, what it’s like to kiss your soulmate…

But that would have been the perfectly _wrong_ time to do it. He’s grateful you had the good sense to talk him down and prioritize his welfare. He smiles at that, looking over at you, still snoozing happily on his shoulder.

… Alright, he’s going to try it!

He shifts slightly in his seat without letting your head fall from its resting place, then carefully straightens out your legs so he can hook one arm under your knees, and one cradling the small of your back. Then, he shifts your weight into his chest and lifts. Easy enough, and you seem to be in a deep sleep, so he hasn’t roused you.

He carries you silently over to the stairs, then he takes the steps slowly and carefully. You weigh nothing to him and his apparent strength, but he wants to be extra careful not to jostle or disrupt you too much so you don’t wake up.

And he feels absolutely _elated_ to be holding you like this – the space beneath his sternum where his soul is is practically _singing_ as it urges him on. He’s flustered by it as his magic floods him with a buzzy feeling from the crown of his skull to his distal phalanges in his feet, making him feel _invincible_ and lighter than air.

He reaches the top of the stairs and realizes he hasn’t made his choice yet.

Left, or right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ohohoho... Where do _you_ think you end up?
> 
> (Psst - Don't worry, Sans is a very good boy. The dubcon tag isn't for here, in case you were worried!)


	18. The Bed.

You wake up somewhere new.

Your first instinct is to panic and reach for Nora, whom you find curled into your side fast asleep like a soft lump. Curling your fingers into her fur and scratching her neck when you find it in the dark, she lets out a deep sigh. You’ve obviously woken her, but she’s quick to fall back to sleep.

The next thing you do is take a look around the room, and realize it’s Sans’. You’ve only been in here a couple of times – when you were helping move furniture into the new house, and then when he was drunk that one night – but even in the darkness the armour stand is a dead giveaway.

Your brain begins to catch up as you yawn. You must have fallen asleep while watching TV with him.

So, if he brought you to his bed because your room is closed off with a barrier, then where is…?

He’s not on the massive four poster bed, that’s a given – it’s just you and your dog. You also don’t own a cot between the three of you. Would he have taken the couch? That seems very un-Sans-like.

Well, whatever the case might be, you should probably take Nora and go sleep in your own bed. You gather the grumbly, huffy puppy in your arms, and shift to sit on the edge of the bed when your question about Sans’ whereabouts is answered.

He took his pillow and slept on the floor on his back, in nothing but a dark muscle shirt and some baggy sport shorts.

He’s still asleep, too, if the closed sockets and rise and fall of his ribcage is any indication. None of your shuffling around or moving a puppy heavy with sleep has disturbed him in the slightest.

You look between the puppy curled up in your arms and the skeleton on the floor. Sighing, you set Nora back down on the bed where she stretches and flops back down, then shift to the end of the bed to hop off so you can get Sans in his own bed.

… It’s nice that he thought to bring you here in the first place, you think. Although he _could_ have just woken you so you could go to sleep in your respective beds, instead of you on his and him on the floor. Then again, sometimes you behave a bit like a bear when you’re woken up, so maybe this was the safer bet.

Without much trouble, you scoop him up in your arms and lay him down on the bed – he’s practically weightless without his armour on. As you lean down to pick up his pillow, you hear him roll onto his side.

“NORA, I _DON’T_ \- … _____?”

Your head snaps up in the twilight to meet his glowing indigo eye lights. Nora had apparently wormed her way up to his face and started licking his nasal ridge – he has a hand held over her snout to keep her from continuing.

“… Sorry,” you apologize softly. “I didn’t mean to wake you. Maybe I should’ve moved her to my room first.”

“IT’S OKAY,” he says, voice still soft with sleep.

You both stare at each other for a long moment.

“… YOU’RE LEAVING?” he finally asks.

… The urge to pet his sweet little skull is verging on _overwhelming_. He looks so innocent and _cute_ right now, and you’re putting him to bed like a sleepy little kid.

“I figured I should go sleep in my own bed, and that you should sleep in yours. Thank you, by the way, for bringing me up here,” you tell him, smiling. “I’ll just grab Nora and be out of your-“

“WAIT.”

He stops you, a bony hand gently resting on your forearm as you reach for your dog. Not grabbing you or restricting you, just there. Come to think of it, besides the time you accidently broke his fingers, you don’t think you’ve _ever_ touched or held his hands when he had his gloves off. His hands are smaller than yours, and they’re hard, but warm with his magic.

And despite his earlier casual show of strength, his touch is so delicate and tender. Your skin pricks up as your cheeks burn and your heart utterly melts under his dark violet gaze.

“… I FEEL LIKE… I DON’T WANT YOU TO GO, NOT YET,” he says, his cheeks illuminating the same purplish-navy colour.

“… I don’t know, Sans,” you hesitate. “I mean, I didn’t think we were already at the stage in our relationship where I’d be waking up in _your bed_ -“

He drops his hand and rolls his skull so his face is pressed into his mattress. “UGH! I DIDN’T MEAN LIKE-“

“I know, I know,” you snicker. “Sorry to tease you. I had to, though.”

You’ve been holding back a lot because you can tell Sans isn’t very big on physical touch to begin with. The gloves were one thing – a barrier to separate him from the rest of the world, you always figured – but now he’s the most vulnerable you’ve ever seen him; no armour on, in thin, loose-fitting clothes, and still quite sleepy. And… He wants you to stay on his _bed_ with him? You _know_ he doesn’t have an illicit bone in his little body, so he just wants to… Cuddle?

You’ve been holding back a bit trying to be respectful of his space. Besides the occasional hand-holding and affectionate noogie, and him caressing your face and playing with your hair when drunk, you haven’t really done anything intimate.

“… Are you _sure?_ ” you ask him. It should be his choice how far this goes.

“YEAH,” he smiles faintly. “I THINK I’D LIKE THAT.”

“Move over, then.”

He scoots over and you climb back onto the bed with him, pulling the sheets up over him. He motions to do the same for you, and you wonder absently at how quickly he got so comfortable with you.

Once tucked under the covers, you look into each other’s eyes in the dark for a long time.

Finally, he reaches a hand out towards you, stopping about halfway and resting in the middle of the massive bed.

“… What do you want to do Sans?” you ask him softly. “It’s your show.”

“JUST… I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND,” he says innocently.

That’s it? That’s fine, honestly. You weren’t sure how comfortable he was with you here late at night or how far he’d want to go, but it seems like he just wants you near and is testing the waters. Cuddling or spooning is probably too much for right now.

“Yeah, I think I can do that,” you smile.

You happily reach a hand out and take his in yours, taking a second to massage the bumpy joints of his rough phalanges in your fingers. His face lights up at your inspection, but it must also be pretty soothing as his eye sockets are half-lidded, sleep catching up to the both of you.

“Night, Sans.”

“GOODNIGHT, _____.”


	19. The Roof.

“ _somebody_ had a good night.”

“SHUT UP.”

You serve up some pancakes as Sans finishes off drying the bacon. He’s had the corners of his hard mouth turned up since he woke up this morning. He even tried to come downstairs and make you breakfast in bed, but after refusing your offer to help him with it, you decided you would show him how to make pancakes and he couldn’t refuse the lesson.

“Yeah, shut up. Besides, the only one anywhere _near_ my crotch last night was Nora when she curled back up into my stomach,” you explain.

“… _AFTER_ SHE TRIED TO STEAL ALL THE BLANKETS,” Sans rolls his eye lights.

“This is why I _always_ have a second throw blanket on my bed – one for me, and one for Nora.”

The pup in question grumbles impatiently at your feet, tapping her paws against the tile floor. You shush her and promise her some bacon in just a minute.

“WELL, I WILL JUST HAVE TO KEEP THAT IN MIND FOR NEXT TIME.”

… Why did that make your face so hot? You didn’t really do anything last night, just held hands until you both fell asleep.

Russ snickers as Sans turns dark blue and immediately backpedals.

“I- I MEAN, FOR IF WE SLEEP TOGETHER IN MY BED AGAIN! _WAIT_ \- NOT LIKE _THAT!_ ” he flusters.

You gather your wits and take him by the shoulder, kissing the top of his head as you offer him his plate. “I know what you meant, though I can’t stop your brother from teasing you about it.”

Taking your plate over to the raised bar side of the kitchen island to sit down and eat, you realize Sans hasn’t budged from his spot. His eye lights have disappeared and his entire skull is that deep indigo colour.

“_____, y’ broke ‘im,” Russ casually accuses you.

What, from a kiss on the head?

“Sans…?”

“I-I’M FINE!” he protests, gathering himself to walk (maybe a little too hurriedly) to sit at the island with the two of you. “THAT WAS… UNEXPECTED.”

“’s yer first kiss, eh bro?” Russ prompts.

“Oh my _gods_ ,” you snicker. “I had no idea! You’re _adorable_.”

Sans sputters for a moment, electing to carve off a big piece of pancake and stuffing it in his mouth so he doesn’t have to say anything. Russ scoffs dramatically and stands from the stool, his dirty plate and utensils left behind.

“i gotta get ta work,” he says, shoving his hands in his pockets and striding towards the door. “see ya.”

You eye his back curiously. “Russ, it’s _Sunday_. Take a day off, you’ve been putting in twelve hours or more every day this week.” Honestly watching him work himself to death is exhausting even _you_ , and you’ve been spending the majority of your time at home with Nora.

“like i told sans th’ other night, ‘m close t’ finishin’ an’ i wanna get it over wit’,” he shrugs, pulling on his jacket.

“WE HAVE TO COME BY FOR A SECURITY SWEEP TODAY, PERHAPS WE COULD BRING YOU SOME LUNCH WHILE WE’RE AT IT?” Sans offers.

That’s right – you’ve been making it a regular thing to go around the building and inspect entry points and check for any more suspicious packages showing up. There was another one last week that contained a white powdery substance and a dispersal mechanism. You were glad to have gotten _that_ one taken care of before Undyne could get too curious.

“sounds delicious. that roast beef thing ya made th’ other day was pretty good,” he bargains.

“I think we have enough to make you some more,” you smile.

“lookin’ forward to it. later.”

“Later!”

* * *

Around eleven is when you and Sans catch the bus and head downtown to the embassy. People are staring at the two of you – a human in a tank top and ripped pajama pants and a skeleton monster in full plate – but you pay them no mind. You always get stared at when you’re out with Sans but you’ve decided that you have thicker skin than that. Sure, it bothers you, but you’re not going to cause a scene unless they start it.

Sans on the other hand is keenly observant of whomever might be throwing you nasty looks, curious as to who has been leaving the mysterious traps for the Royal Scientist and the Queen to find when he’s not around. He hates that none of the threats had been direct confrontation, nor does he enjoy the idea that he _still_ doesn’t know specifically _who_ his enemies are.

Well, maybe your security system you ordered in will help to identify the culprits. It’s more sophisticated than you’re used to, and it’s something you’ll have to set up entirely on your own as opposed to having an external company do it, because you’re not really sure who can be trusted either. It’s new territory for you but not _especially_ so – you’re sure that you can figure it out well enough to get the high-def cameras recording and a secure way to view the feeds from home.

After what feels like an hour you’re there. You start pacing the outside of the building with Sans trying to recognize any changes from last time.

“THIS SIDE IS SECURE,” he announces, tugging at the chained door on the one side. It’s a fire escape that will need to be re-opened when the building is fully in service, but for now it’s a vulnerable access point.

“I still don’t like that that’s shut with just a chain and a padlock,” you point out. “That’s just inviting them to snip it with bolt cutters or something.”

“TRUE, BUT YOUR BARRIER ON THE OTHER SIDE WILL STOP THEM FROM ENTERING,” he grins at you.

“And then they’ll just know there’s something up with it magic-wise. I’m not sure I love relying on my barriers as much as we have already.”

“DON’T WORRY, _____,” he says, grasping your hand in his and squeezing it gently. “IT’S TEMPORARY. WE JUST NEED TO BE CAUTIOUS FOR THE TIME BEING.”

“Well, when _you’re_ the one telling me not to worry,” you tease.

“… THIS IS NEW.”

You follow his hand where he’s pointing. There’s a dirty shoe print on the wall.

… Higher than any person could realistically kick from standing on the ground.

You look up a bit further and see another one, and then realize that you’re both standing below the metal fire escape connecting the second and third floors!

“Someone’s been trying to _parkour_ up the side of the building,” you reveal. “Recently, too – it rained pretty heavily two days ago, so these are fresher than that.”

“… PARKOUR?”

“It’s like this… Super-athletic and _dangerous_ way of climbing up and jumping to and from buildings, it’s something that’s been catching on thanks to games like Mirror’s Edge or Assassin’s Creed,” you explain. “The trend has stuck around, and there are lots of videos of people doing it. Anyways, it just means that they’re trying to find another way in from the second or third floors. Or hell, maybe even the _roof_.”

“… YOU HAVE BARRIERS OVER ALL OF THE WINDOWS, CORRECT?”

“Yes, but _not_ the roof!”

Both of you hurry inside, blazing past Russ and even Queen Toriel herself without so much as a how-do-you-do, finding the stairs leading up to the roof access quickly. Sans breaks the lock he pushes on the door so hard, and you follow him behind with your hands out at the ready.

Frantically, both of you start looking around. It’s a gravel patio kind of thing with the chimney for Toriel’s fancy fireplace, some other exhaust pipes, air conditioning units, the usual for a small and old building like the embassy that’s gone from factory to office space to apartment building through its long life.

But with two sets of eyes on the entire surface of the roof, even digging at patches of gravel that appear to be clumped up or recently disturbed, the two of you find… _Nothing_.

“Well, that’s _some_ relief,” you say. “Scary though.”

“WE SHOULD GET RUSS TO RIP THAT FIRE ESCAPE OFF THE SIDE OF THE BUILDING – WE ALREADY HAVE ONE INTERNALLY FROM WHEN THIS WAS AN OFFICE BUILDING,” Sans points out.

“Agreed. And Undyne and I will modify the camera plan to have eyes on the roof as well.” You point at another building nearby that’s maybe only a couple feet taller. “I have strong doubts that whatever parkour asshole tried to get up here could actually _leap_ that far, but maybe we can do something to discourage them from trying.”

“MAYBE A BARRIER CONCEALED BY THIS GRAVEL COULD HELP AS WELL, AND OF COURSE THE ACCESS DOOR.”

“Yeah… Glad we caught this before anything happened.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not so gentle reminder that they still have an unknown enemy threat that they have to deal with.


	20. The Shorty.

“Do you dance?”

Sans is surprised by your question over breakfast the next morning. And frankly, you’re surprised to be asking it.

“IT’S NOT SOMETHING I’M WELL PRACTICED AT,” he admits shyly, cheekbones dusting a pale indigo blue. “BUT… I LEARNED SOME OF IT, FROM ONE OF UNDYNE’S HUMAN TV SHOWS. AT AN EARLIER STAGE I FIGURED THAT, IF I COULDN’T _FIGHT_ MY WAY TO THE TOP OF THE RANKS OF THE ROYAL GUARD, THEN PERHAPS I COULD IMPRESS THE QUEEN IN SOME… _OTHER_ FASHION.”

He looks contemplative for a moment, then eyes you curiously. “… WHY DO YOU ASK?”

“Just had a weird dream last night is all,” you yawn. “You and I were like, ballroom dancing, alone together in some big fancy ballroom. It wasn’t _just_ you, either – or, well, it _was_ you, at _first_.”

“HOW DO YOU MEAN?”

“You were holding me close, and I was looking down into your eyes,” you say, holding your arms out as you remember the strangely vivid dream. Sans blushes as you begin to sway slightly, while you try to recount the steps. “Then, you spun me out, and then back in, and even though I hadn’t let go of your hand, it was suddenly Russ that I was dancing with.”

Russ seems to perk his head up at that.

“So I was looking up at Russ instead, but it still felt _right_ somehow? Like I wasn’t surprised to suddenly see him instead of you? But then, he dipped me, and I looked away at the empty ballroom upside-down for a second, but then when I was brought back to my feet, it felt like… I don’t know, someone else? But I woke up before I could see their face or any identifying details. It wasn’t Russ or you though, just someone tall. And… _Strong_.”

“… skeleton?”

“I got that impression. _Not_ human, definitely. Kinda weirded me out.”

“maybe it was still sans, jus’ with my height,” Russ grins, giving his smaller brother a noogie on the skull. “ya li’l shrimpo.”

“UGH, _PAPYRUS!_ I’M STILL EATING??” he squirms, ego bruised. “AND I MIGHT GET TALLER SOME DAY! YOU DON’T KNOW!”

“Maybe it was,” you smile. That’s reassuring at least. “And there aren’t any _other_ skeletons besides you two, right?”

“not that we’re aware of,” Russ grins.

“… DO YOU WISH I WAS TALLER?” Sans asks, blushing slightly and sounding very insecure.

“Nope. You’re cute just the way you are,” you reassure, kissing his cheekbone.

He stammers a bit and shoves a big mouthful of food in his mouth, pointedly looking away from you.

“how often ‘re you gunna break ‘im like that, _____?” Russ teases.

“As often as it takes for him to build up an immunity.” Or until he starts doing it back, you smile.

“… YOU’RE BOTH AWFUL. I’M GOING TO WORK,” he bemoans, spinning on the barstool and hopping off, heading for the door.

“Give me a minute to put dishes away and send Nora out and I’ll join you, okay honey?” you call after him sweetly.

He nearly falls over as he tries to work his boot on, blushing furiously. Russ cackles while his brother eventually gets himself sorted out.

* * *

“… DOES IT BOTHER YOU THAT I’M SHORT?”

“Sans, I already said at breakfast that it doesn’t.”

He’s doubting you, though. Is it because Russ showed up in your dream too? He’s not worried that you’d like Russ over _him_ , is he? Russ isn’t your soulmate, _Sans_ is. Plus you’ve been growing fond of the cutie with how much time you seem to spend together.

Sans sighs, sitting cross-legged at the other end of the couch from you.

“… It bothers _you_ , though, doesn’t it?” you observe.

He hangs his head.

“I’VE ALREADY SAID THAT I WASN’T REALLY INTERESTED IN A RELATIONSHIP BEFORE, WHEN WE WERE UNDERGROUND,” he reiterates. “BUT… I _DO_ STILL WISH I COULD AT LEAST LOOK YOU IN THE EYE.”

“I don’t think any less of you because of your height,” you attempt.

“I GUESS I JUST… EXPECTED THAT I’D GET TALLER, LIKE PAPYRUS. MEN ARE _SUPPOSED_ TO BE TALL AND STRONG, RIGHT?”

“… This is a real issue with you, huh?”

“EVERYTHING IN THE UNDERGROUND IS ABOUT STRENGTH AND POWER. PHYSICAL APPEARANCE _DOES_ PLAY A ROLE IN THAT, AS WELL,” he explains. “I MAY HAVE THE PHYSICAL STRENGTH, AND MY MAGIC ATTACKS _CAN_ BE QUITE POWERFUL, BUT MY BODY DOES NOT COMMUNICATE EITHER OF THOSE THINGS. I’M… _SMALL_ , I HAVE A ROUND FACE INSTEAD OF HARD EDGES LIKE PAPY, MY SHOULDERS ARE NARROW, MY FORM IS SLENDER IN EVERY DIMENSION AND MY ARMOUR CAN ONLY AUGMENT IT SO MUCH.”

“Hey, come here,” you say, opening up your arms where you’re lounging on the couch.

Sans eyes you curiously for a beat too long. You roll your eyes.

“ _Cuddle me_ , you _derp_.”

He blushes darkly and blinks his eye sockets hard.

“Do I have to come over there?” you threaten.

“WHAT ABOUT NORA? SHE’S IN YOUR LAP.”

“She’ll move and come back.”

He ducks his head down shyly as he finally crawls over to you.

You waste no time in wrapping him up in your arms, the side of his skull pressed against your collarbone. His knees are bent between your stretched out legs and he’s fiddling with a strand of your hair that fell over your opposite shoulder. He’s already taken off his armour for the day, otherwise you wouldn’t have offered – instead he’s got some comfy casual clothes on – sweat pants with stripes down the outside of each leg and a worn grey t-shirt.

“… If I had to be extremely honest with you,” you begin. “Then, I guess I’d have to say that I never really saw myself dating a shorter guy, _or_ a younger guy for that matter.”

Sans huffs. “I KNEW IT…”

“ _However_ ,” you continue, giving him a comforting squeeze. “I think that every girl has this idea in her head that her ideal guy should be _some_ combination of tall, dark, and handsome, but I can say from experience that that’s usually the _worst_ kind of guy to date, at least for me. So, after a couple of bad experiences with guys like _that_ , I figure that I just don’t really _have_ a type anymore.”

“I think it’s good that the universe made _you_ my soulmate instead of anyone else,” you reveal. His eye lights flick up at you, surprised. “Because it’s like… Now I don’t have to think about all my hang-ups from past relationships when trying for a new one, instead it’s just like… Here you go, here’s the perfect guy.”

He blushes. “I DON’T KNOW ABOUT _THAT_ …”

“Well, I mean… I have body issues too, actually,” you reveal. His brow bones jerk upwards. “But you’ve never really focused on what I look like at _all_ , never judged me for it, just cared about me and decided that you were gunna protect me. Even when you were upset about having the whole soulmates thing dropped on you, you weren’t upset at me or any aspect _about_ me being your soulmate besides maybe my being human. Your main complaint was just that you didn’t want to be forced into something you didn’t want.”

“… AND YOUR MAIN COMPLAINT WAS THAT I HAD CHANGED OVERNIGHT – THAT I WASN’T RESPECTING YOU OR LETTING YOU IN,” he remembers. “… MY BEHAVIOUR WAS AWFUL THEN, I’M SORRY.”

“Don’t sweat it, we’re well past that now,” you smile at him.

“IT DOESN’T EVEN BOTHER YOU THAT I’M A MONSTER?” he looks up at you.

You shrug your shoulders as best as you can in this reclined cuddle position. “Honestly I almost _prefer_ it. Humans _suck_.”

“… AND I SUPPOSE THAT YOU HAVEN’T BEEN RAISED TO HATE MONSTERS IN _YOUR_ SOCIETY,” he points out thoughtfully.

“Nah. We didn’t even know you guys existed until a couple of months ago.”

“… RIGHT.”

He rests his slight weight against you and you both enjoy the cozy moment in silence for a while. You run your thumb up and down his arm along the outside of his humerus while he gently massages the joints of your other hand in both of his. His eye sockets are half-lidded as he truly starts to relax into you.

“… Actually,” you finally say, regretting breaking the quiet moment already. “I wanted to ask you something.”

“YEAH? WHAT IS IT?”

“… Do you think it’d be okay if I started calling you my boyfriend?” you ask nervously. “I mean, I know neither of us were really on board with the soulmates thing, but… I _think_ that I’m ready to give dating another shot, if it’s with you. If _you’re_ _okay_ with it, that is.”

You’ve been fighting your own internalized reservations for a few days now, because damnit, you _like_ this cutie, and maybe you deserve another shot at happiness. You have absolutely no idea how this is going to work out, but you figure you’ll find an answer to that through dating.

Immediately you get a knot of worry in your throat as he shifts to sit up, thinking that maybe that’s too far, too much for him, given both of your reservations about the whole soulmate business to start with. You don’t protest though, opening your arms and letting him go freely – maybe you’d pushed him too far when you asked him over for a cuddle, but really you just wanted to comfort him at that moment, nothing more.

But instead of pulling away completely, he hovers over you for a moment, cheeks stained indigo-blue. “… DEPENDS,” he says, as soft as his raspy voice can manage.

You blink. “On?”

“CAN I- UM, _MAY_ I TRY… K-KISSING YOU?”

… _Oh_.

He _is_ on the same page after all!

“I’VE NEVER DONE IT BEFORE SO I DON’T KNOW WHAT IT’S LIKE, AND WHILE PAPY SENT ME SOME WEIRD VIDEOS, THEY DIDN’T REALLY _EXPLAIN_ ANYTHING,” he rambles nervously. “I-IF YOU DON’T _WANT_ TO THOUGH, THAT’S FINE! I MEAN, IT’S NOT A _REQUIREMENT_ OR ANYTHING, WE DON’T _HAVE_ TO-“

“Sans.”

“… YES, _____?”

You throw your arms up over your head like some melodramatic maiden in a period drama.

“ _Kiss me_.”

He flushes at the gesture and looks like he’s about to lose his nerve.

But then he leans in, his mouth close to yours. He hesitates a moment, biting his hard lip as he’s unsure how to proceed. You can tell he wants to though – his eye lights are warm and wanting, he’s just truly never done this before.

You decide to do him a favour and close the distance.

He jerks at the contact but kisses you back clumsily, pressing his mouth to yours. You bring your arms back up to lazily rest against his upper back.

It feels _really nice_ to kiss Sans, your soulmate. You feel a comfortable warmth spreading out from your centre as he gently presses his body against yours. When he releases your lips from his you immediately feel like it’s too soon.

“… HOW WAS THAT?”

You bring a hand to your chin playfully, as if you’re seriously pondering how to rate it. “Mmm, I’d say about a five out of ten. Pretty decent for your first one.”

“THAT BAD, HUH?”

“Eh, it just means we’ll have to get a _lot_ of practice in,” you tease.

“… I THINK I’M ALRIGHT WITH THAT,” he smirks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Relevant Tumblr post (character heights): [Link](https://ladyanatares.tumblr.com/post/190628653860/height-reference-for-nybc)
> 
> Also, I've been adding tags based on some stuff I've been writing ahead. I'll do my best to put trigger warnings in bold in the notes ahead of the relevant chapters. Like with my other many unfinished works, the plot kind of got away from me a bit -_-;


	21. The Jealousy.

Jealousy is _not_ a feeling Mutt is used to having.

In contrast to his vanilla little brother, he’s had a very prolific sex life – he was notorious for picking up at Muffet’s and bringing them over to the local inn for a quick romp, so much so the owner of the building would just roll her eyes when he came in with the flavour of the night and toss him the key. He tipped well so he practically always had a room available there.

But he was never one to get attached to anyone while he was doing it. He wouldn’t even sleep afterwards – _plenty_ of monsters would’ve savoured the chance at catching him in a vulnerable moment and dusting him – he’d just say good night and leave them there with the room paid in full, heading home.

Getting attached is new. Feeling jealous is _very_ new.

But he _felt_ that, when you kissed Sans at breakfast yesterday morning.

He felt that when he overheard you two talking quietly, stretched out on the bed together when he walked past Sans’ room last night.

When the two of you slow danced in the kitchen this morning, he’d left early with half of his breakfast still on the plate.

What he wouldn’t give to have you on _his_ bed for once…

But he knows he needs to stay out of it. Mutt is a miserable shit of a person who constantly has to keep his emotions closed off to avoid his magic spiraling out of control. Keeping busy with the embassy helps – it’s really starting to look good in there, and that’s all thanks to his twelve-plus hour days.

… Maybe he _should_ try and find a different outlet. His spine _has_ been hurting the past few days with all the drywall and painting he’s been doing.

He used to smoke Echoflower cigs to calm and centre himself, but he’d kicked the habit just before they surfaced two and a half months ago. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to get another pack, just for the days it gets harder to ignore the two of you.

* * *

“What the hell, you _smoke_ now?”

Nora had raced past his ankles on the back deck when the door had slid open behind him, and you stepped outside to keep watch over her as it’s been getting darker earlier as summer ends and fall approaches.

Mutt takes a look at the cig in his phalanges and immediately wants to put it out at your tone. Instead, he rebelliously takes another puff.

“’s monster cigs,” he explains, blowing curls of bluish-grey smoke out. “loosens me up. works sorta like human pot, ‘cept it helps me focus too.”

“… Well, credit where it’s due – it doesn’t _stink_ like cigarette or pot smoke,” you notice. “It reminds me more of sweet incense.”

He arches a brow bone at that, holding it out to you. “wanna hit?”

“… In another _life_ , maybe,” you decline. “My parents were smokers.”

“ah,” he hums. Now he _really_ wants to put it out, but if you’re standing next to him in a loose tank top with no bra and _those_ _shorts_ then he needs every ounce of restraint he can muster.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to lecture you,” you reassure him. “I mean, just because _I_ have a negative association with it doesn’t mean I get to tell anybody else to quit what works for them, right? I may not _like_ the smell of weed but it’s not my place to judge – to each their own.”

“Plus it’s not like you even _have_ lungs to destroy,” you chuckle. 

He rumbles a laugh at that.

He looks down at the cig again after taking another hit. “… this stuff _can_ be addictin’,” he admits. “used t’ have a problem wit’ moderatin’ it, but… think i got it under control now.”

“… You sure?”

You seem worried about him.

He puts it out against the brick on the outside of the house, tucking what’s left of it back in the pack. He’s already feeling pleasantly buzzed and doesn’t need any more for tonight.

“yeah, i got it,” he reassures.

“Okay, I’ll trust you,” you smile.

Your smile does funny things to his soul.

You stretching and yawning in that outfit that shows a lot more skin that he’s used to seeing on you does funny things to _other_ parts of him, as well. He decides to pointedly look away at whatever Nora’s doing.

… Which is taking a _shit_ , apparently. _Great_.

“I want to drag you out shopping with me tomorrow,” you announce at the tail end of your yawn.

… What?

“… sans?” he asks.

“He’s busy all day tomorrow – the Queen wants to do some kind of press event to discuss issues facing monsters and her next steps, so he’s coordinating that with some news people.”

“what kinda shoppin’?”

“Clothes. It occurs to me that my wardrobe is about a _third_ of the size of Sans’, and he just usually wears his armour out everywhere,” you explain. “Plus a pair of my favourite pajama pants disintegrated in the wash last week, and some of my other stuff is getting seriously worn out.”

Ah, that’s right – it must be laundry day for you already, hence the outfit.

“why not drag undyne along, then?” Mutt proposes. “she’s a female, she knows girl shit.”

You roll your eyes. “In case you hadn’t noticed I’m not _half_ as girly as Undyne, and she’d probably try and make me buy pieces to a cosplay or something. I need _clothes_ clothes, like everyday normal stuff that’s _not_ falling apart or sweat-stained or has holes in the elbows.”

“Plus,” you add, a devious glint to your eyes. “I’ll _probably_ need some help getting to and from the mall, and with carrying stuff back.”

“that figures, doesn’ it? i’m a chauffeur,” he complains playfully, then chuckles.

“And we hardly ever spend _any_ time together with you working long hours every single day,” you huff.

That’s for good reason, he thinks to himself.

He feels your hand wrap around his radius, gently gripping him and giving him a feast for the eyes down the front of your loose tank top. He’s got half a mind to jerk away, but instead he just focuses his eyes forward away from you, hoping his magic stays the hell off of his face and doesn’t give him away.

“You deserve a break, and I need help buying clothes,” you assert. “Come shopping with me tomorrow. It won’t take more than a couple of hours, okay?”

… _Son_ of a _bitch_. He’s _got_ to, doesn’t he? He can’t exactly shove you off or make you go by yourself.

“… a’right, quit twistin’ my arm. i’ll come.”

“Oh,” you fret, letting go of him. “I wasn’t, was I?”

He chuckles. “figure o’ speech, darlin’.”


	22. The Shopping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of Russ being a crass perv here.

The mall is _full_ of kids this afternoon, and you comment that it must be a PD Day today, whatever that means. Mutt trails behind you as you lead the way.

First stop on your shopping trip was the food court, actually – breakfast was hours ago, and you complained that you were hungry. He complied and you both hit the food court and got your separate orders before sitting down at a small table together. He’d opted for a slice of ready-made pizza warmed up with a soda, and you’d gotten some fried chicken strips with a dipping sauce and some crispy fries.

“First place I want to hit is the store that’s just around the corner,” you announce, still chewing on a bite of food. “It’s one of the pricier stores I go through but they’re the only ones that sell pants that actually fit me.”

“pajama pants?”

You grin. “No, actual office pants,” you sigh. “I only had like four functional pairs to wear through the week at my old job – I’d just re-wear the ones from Monday on Friday and hope no one noticed. But the zipper broke on one of them, so now I’d like to grab at least a couple more pair.”

“what for?” You spend most of your time at home, going to the embassy sparingly for security checks, barriers, and your server room on the third floor. Plus he’s never known you to be shy about going out in your pajama pants in public anyways.

“For if we ever go public that I’m working with you guys,” you point out. “If I’m ever going to be front and center for monster-human relations _ever_ , I don’t want to look like I just rolled out of _bed_.”

Mutt chuckles at that. “naw. wearin’ yer pj’s is a show o’ _confidence_ ,” he figures. “’s like yer sayin’ you can do this in yer _sleep_.”

You face twists in amusement as you visualize it, then you burst out laughing.

“Never thought of it _that_ way before,” you grin. “But I still need normal people pants.”

Well, it figures he couldn’t get out of this that easily.

* * *

Your _ass_ looks _amazing_.

“What do you think?” you pose for him.

“they fit well?” He forces himself to look at your face instead.

“Yeah, basically perfect actually.”

“then get ‘em,” he shrugs. Your curves are fucking _outstanding_.

“Not sure I like the fabric, but they’ll probably soften up in the dryer, right?”

He’s _not_ letting you leave the store _without_ those pants.

“prob’ly.”

“ _Well_ ,” you hum, checking the price on the tag hanging down from your waist. “I guess I’ll get Sans’ opinion then, then I can still return them so long as the tag’s still on.”

He’s got half a mind to tear the tag off _right_ then and there.

“where to next?”

“Actually, I want to try on just a couple more things first. It’s been hot as _balls_ outside lately and it occurs to me that I need a new pair of shorts.”

Mutt is internally _howling_ and about halfway to _yeeting_ himself into the fucking _void_.

* * *

“You seem stressed out today,” you point out between stores.

“’s all th’ kids. a bit crowded today,” he lies easily.

“… If you want to take a break and dip outside for a smoke, I don’t mind.”

 _Yes, goddamnit_. He’s _still_ got that panty store on the brain. He couldn’t follow you in obviously but the suggestive little black and pink store bag you’re swinging on your far side is taunting him.

“… y’ said ya wanted some shirts next?” he suggests, and you nod. “let’s get those over wit’.”

* * *

Not everything you try on fits as perfectly as your new dress pants, and you seem to have a real problem with shirts in particular. You keep pulling different styles into the changing room with you and coming back out in the t-shirt you left the house with on, with the rejected sweaters and blouses piled over your arm, disappointed.

“Sorry this is taking so long,” you apologize, self-conscious about this already being the third store you’ve tried.

“’s fine, take yer time.” At least this time you’re not coming out to model them for him, so he’s got less to be distracted about. Well, besides you being you.

It’s been over an hour though, and you’ve only bought one sweater and a few new tank tops and cami’s off the clearance rack at the last place you were at. That wasn’t enough for you though, and you were determined on finding _something_ that works for your body type.

“… I’ll try again later in the season,” you resign, coming out of the change room in your t-shirt once again. “They should have some new stuff out for Fall in about a month.”

“if y’ don’t mind my askin’, what was wrong wit’ all the shirts?”

“ _So many things_ ,” you huff. “The main thing being that everything mass-manufactured like this doesn’t really fit well on somebody above a B cup.”

“… i don’ follow.”

You hold up one of the sweaters you’re putting back on the rack. ”Neckline dips too low and the front stretches out so much that it becomes see-through.”

Moving over to another section, you hold out another shirt – a collared one that buttons down the front. “ _Way_ too tight in the chest and too loose in the waist by contrast, and absolutely _no_ stretch or give in the material.”

Moving on again, you hold up a rather nice shirt with a diagonal zip across the chest. “Draws too much attention, plus I _thought_ I’d dig the asymmetry but I completely lost interest once I saw it on my body.”

Finally, you hold up a pale lavender dress shirt. “This one… _Eh_ , it was _okay_ , I guess… It’s just loose in the waist again, plus I’d have to sew in a clasp in between these two buttons here to avoid bursting out of it.”

“… think i get it now,” he announces. “y’ don’ want people lookin’ at yer rack.”

You blink, flushing and looking away. “That’s basically it, yeah. I _try_ to dress it down, but women’s clothing is so keen on showing it off, I _hate_ it. Best I can manage is stretchy turtlenecks, but I still need undershirts for those so the world doesn’t see what colour bra I happen to be wearing that day.”

Mutt hums to himself for a moment, then walks over to a rack and plucks one of the earlier rejects off of it, offering it to you. “try this one on,” he suggests.

“ _That_ one? It’s too flashy – _really_ not my style.”

“but it fit right, yeah?”

“… I’d still have to sew on a clasp between the buttons…”

“then sew one on.”

“ _Russ_ …”

“i’s sans’ colour.”

 _That_ gets your attention. You look the indigo shirt over once again, then huff playfully and snatch it out of his hand, throwing it over your shoulder and marching back to the changing room for one more go.

He follows you and takes out his phone. “y’ better come back out an’ show me it,” he calls after you.

“ _Whatever!_ ”

You do, and it looks great – except for the boob-window that you fiddle with to try and close up, of course. He snaps a picture on his phone before you’re ready for it and texts it to Sans for his thoughts.

“We shouldn’t bug him today, he’s _working!_ ” you protest.

“he’ll appreciate th’ distraction, trust me.”

It takes a minute but Sans approves, texting back an emphatic “BUY TEN” with the heart eyes emoji. You look over his arm when he shows you his phone and blush at the message while Mutt cackles.

“Okay _fine_ , we can get this one,” you surrender. “I actually happen to have a couple clasps left over from the _last_ time I had to buy some…”

* * *

You keep him quiet company while he works through half a smoke outside, now fervently texting Sans your complaints about Mutt forcing you to buy that shirt.

He enjoys the momentary silence, staring off into the parking lot as he works through clearing his head. He actually feels a bit guilty now for all the peeks he’s been stealing at your figure when you’re not looking, about his thoughts of what he’d do to you if he could get his hands on your body, now that he knows you have a problem with at least one part of it.

Maybe learning that will help him keep himself in check better from now on. This shopping trip turned out to not be a bad idea after all.

* * *

“i’s a _pajama store_.”

“Russ, don’t I have you carrying _enough_ bags as it is?” you protest.

“they’re pretty light, i could take a few more on. c’mon, this ‘s _exactly_ yer style.”

And there’s a white two piece outfit in the window that’s currently tormenting him. He’s not sure you’ll go for it, but he’d like to entertain the thought for as long as possible.

You giggle as you can’t deny that you _do_ wear pajamas quite often. “… Alright, I _suppose_ we can browse around for five minutes or so.”

 _Yess_.

Within one minute you’re petting the super plush pajama bottoms and eyeing some of the more loose-fitting tops. Within five, you’re piling stuff onto your arm to try on. Mutt starts browsing the men’s side of the store while he waits, finding a couple of things he might like and trying them on, as well.

“Oh _wow_ ,” you comment as you step out of the changing room the same time he does. “Those look _good_ on you, you should get them.”

_Fuck off magic don’t you **dare** -_

“yea?”

“ _Yeah_. Man, I should drag Sans to this store.”

He lets out a breath he was holding in. “we ‘bout wrapped up here?”

“In a minute. I just need to decide which ones I should put back.”

He arches a bony brow at that. “why?”

“It’s _really expensive_ in here,” you fret. “Like more than _double_ the prices at the other places we were at. And, I mean, I guess I don’t really _need_ the purple one with the little llamas all over it…”

“how much ‘re we talkin’, if you got ‘em all?”

You tell him.

“… so?”

“But- That’s _so much money!_ ”

“what would m’ brother say?”

You roll your eyes and scoff. “He’d tell me not to worry about it and to just get it.”

“then do that.”

“ _But_ -“

“text ‘im if ya like, ‘m gunna get outta these an’ take ‘em up to th’ register.”

“… _Fine_.”

You each get your things together and meet up at the register. While you’re there, he notices your eyes drifting over towards one of the mannequins in the window.

“thinkin’ ‘bout tryin’ something else on?” Mutt prompts.

“I don’t know, _maybe_ …”

“ _please_.”

“… What?”

 _Shit._ “sans ‘ll love it.” _Pathetic_ save.

Once you’re both cashed out, you tap his arm as you leave the store.

“Wait here for one minute?” you ask him.

He nods, and you disappear back inside.

It takes about five minutes, but you return with another bag at your side, and a _very_ big smile.

* * *

“Then we stopped by the pet store and found some nice dental cookies for Nora, which she went _bananas_ over after dinner. After that we hit the chocolate store, then got ice cream like you suggested. After _that_ , well, while I _tried_ to get him interested in the arcade it was _packed_ , and we were both pretty tired by that point anyways.”

“DID HE ENJOY HIS DAY OFF?” Sans asks, resting on his forearms as he marvels at you stretched out on his bed next to him, decked out in your new black lace nightie. You’re glad you had that last-minute impulse purchase – it’s surprisingly comfy and it looks _goddamned amazing_ on you, even if it _was_ expensive.

“I think so. He was smiling a fair bit and seemed to relax more the longer we were out. I _really_ didn’t take Russ as someone who would enjoy shopping like that, you know?”

“I’M SURE HE ENJOYED HIMSELF MORE THAN HE LET ON,” Sans beams at you.

You roll onto your side and fix him with a skeptical look. “… What are you plotting, Sans? Why send me out shopping with Russ?”

“NO PARTICULAR REASON,” he smirks, and you _know_ something must be up. “YOU NEEDED SOME NEW CLOTHES, AND PAPY NEEDED TO SPEND SOME TIME AWAY FROM WORK.”

“How did _your_ work go today, anyways?”

“OH, I DIDN’T HAVE ALL THAT MUCH TO DO. I WAS DONE BY ABOUT NOON OR SO,” he shrugs.

You gasp and grab his pillow to swing it at him. He chuckles as he easily deflects it. “You could have come with us!” you complain.

“MAYBE NEXT TIME,” he grins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can't stop won't stop. On to the next chapter!
> 
> Also can you tell that I hate shopping? -_-; Fuck shirts.


	23. The Dream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suggestive fluff and talk about kids and breeding, but still pretty innocent overall.
> 
> Except for Russ. Russ is never innocent with anything XD

Sans is getting bolder with you.

It’s been happening by degrees and with a regular routine attached to it – as soon as Nora’s done with her dinner at night and signals she’s ready to sleep by curling up on her blanket on the couch, you scoop her up and take her to Sans’ room, with him following closely behind. Sometimes you pop into your room to change into something a touch more exciting, sometimes you just want to get to the good part and go in what you’re already wearing.

There, you’ve been ‘practicing’ kissing (making out) and letting your hands wander over each other’s bodies for up to an hour before falling asleep cuddled together. He’s been finding his confidence in steps – if he rested his hand on your side, you’d make sure your shirt would hike up slightly so that he’d trace gentle lines into your skin instead. If his hands wandered up or down, you’d press your own down on his to silently encourage him to keep going.

The black nightie was a _very_ good buy, and is his clear favourite – he enjoys tracing the lace patterns up and down your sides, and would cup his hands over your breasts, massaging his hard thumbs over the tops of them and leaving gentle kisses behind.

Sex hasn’t come up so far, and you’re not sure whether it will by this point – the furthest you’ve been undressed by him was down to a tank top and panties. But, you’re _more_ than happy to go at Sans’ pace and with whatever he’s in the mood for at night, knowing that all of this still very new to him. You feel pretty fantastically spoiled by the attention as it is and don’t want to chance ruining anything by pushing him.

… Well, you _do_ push him sometimes. Just to see how he reacts to something new, and whether he likes it or asks you to stop, which you _always_ do if he asks. He likes it when you deepen a kiss by sucking on his tongue, when you trace or rub his vertebrae along his spine, but massaging the wing of his pelvis was off-limits for now. You’d settled on tracing the line of his boxers instead, and that caused him to play with the band of your panties from then on. Sometimes he’d just dip his distal phalanges in and trace along where the band had pressed into your skin, sometimes he’d pinch them together over your hips, but he’d always pull them back into position by the time you both got tired and wanted to chat before drifting off in each other’s arms.

“… I might have to go sleep in my own bed for a few days,” you warn him one night.

“WHAT?? WHY?” He looks so disappointed.

“It’s a bit embarrassing to explain, but… _Well_ ,” you sigh. “My period’s starting soon, and I don’t want to subject you to that if at all possible.”

He frowns, not quite understanding. “WHAT’S A PERIOD?”

You go over the details as delicately as possible, even the fact that you’ll be bleeding from your intimate parts for up to a week, and he surprisingly doesn’t seem too put off by it. He just listens patiently to your every word.

“It affects everybody in different ways, and it’s not consistent each cycle. With me, sometimes I get a pimple or two on my face or feel bloated for a couple of days. I also crave rare red meat and dark chocolate like _nobody’s_ business,” you chuckle.

“IT’S SORT OF LIKE YOU’RE COMPLETING YOUR HEAT CYCLE AND STARTING A NEW ONE,” Sans observes. “THIS HAPPENS EVERY MONTH FOR YOU?”

“… Heat cycle?”

His cheekbones glow a deep indigo hue, then he gathers you up in his arms and starts petting your hair. “NOT EVERY MONSTER GETS ONE, BUT… _SOMETIMES_ WE HAVE A BI-ANNUAL HEAT WHERE OUR MAGIC GETS AMPLIFIED FOR A COUPLE WEEKS. IT’S THE, UM… BEST TIME FOR BREEDING, APPARENTLY.”

“… We haven’t really talked about that yet, have we?” you point out. “You said it once while you were _drunk_ , but…”

“… WHAT DO YOU WANT?” he asks, speaking into your hair.

As much as you enjoy being held like this, you need to look him in the face when talking about this. “… I don’t know how I feel about it anymore,” you answer honestly. “I _used_ to want kids, but after things fell through with my last ex, I don’t know that I have it in me anymore.”

He hums, taking your hand in his and cradling it against his sternum. “… I DON’T KNOW WHAT I WANT EITHER IN THAT REGARD,” he admits. “IT… _SEEMED_ LIKE A PRETTY GOOD IDEA WHILE I WAS DRUNK, THOUGH,” he grins, face lighting up again.

“We _probably_ shouldn’t make big decisions like that under the influence,” you tease him.

“THAT’S PROBABLY WISE,” he snickers.

“Do skeleton monsters _get_ a bi-annual heat?”

“I DON’T THINK SO – I’VE NEVER HAD ONE, AT LEAST,” he admits.

“You’d probably know by now, being almost thirty and all.”

“YEAH…”

“Tired?”

“A BIT.”

“I’ll shut up then. Good night, Sans.”

“SWEET DREAMS, _____.”

* * *

You jerk awake with a gasp, heart still pounding as you try to calm down.

It’s still the middle of the night, you notice. Sans has rolled away from you, his ribcage gently expanding and contracting with his breathing, still asleep. Good, you didn’t wake him with your panicked flailing.

Fucking _nightmares_ , though.

Nora perks up as you climb off the bed, deciding that you need a drink and to clear your head before trying to sleep again. You quietly tell her to stay, not wanting her to fully wake up and follow you downstairs thinking it’s time to go outside and start her day.

Shutting the door as softly as you can behind you, you head downstairs to the kitchen for a glass of juice. As you’re standing in the dark house, you glance towards the patio door and spot…

… The red smoulder of a cigarette just outside. It brightens and dims as whoever’s holding it takes a drag.

… Russ?

Emptying the small glass of juice, you rest it in the sink and decide to head outside. The tank top you wore to bed is one of your longer ones, so tugging it down covers your butt easily, which _should_ be decent enough to check on Russ and see what he’s up to.

He turns as the door slides open behind him, seeing you step out onto the patio. “Hey,” you greet.

“hey back,” he nods. “rough night?”

“You could say that, I actually woke up from a nightmare.”

“you seem surprised.”

“Haven’t had a genuine nightmare in a long while,” you explain. “I learned a long time ago how to control my dreams a bit, so if a dream ever turns out bad I can usually fight back or figure my way out of it. This one was different though, it didn’t feel like one of my regular dreams at all.”

“what was it about?”

“I really can’t remember all that well now,” you shake your head. “At the end of it though, it was like… There was a skeletal hand reaching for me from the darkness. _That_ was what made me jump halfway out of my skin.”

“hmm.”

“What about you? Bad dream, same as me?”

“y’ could say that.”

“What about?”

“… stuff from th’ underground. nothin’ unusual.”

Sans and Russ get pretty closed off when it comes to talking about their lives down there. You decide not to press him, then.

“… bit of a chill out here, eh?”

“Yeah,” you agree, rubbing your arms with your hands to chase away the goosebumps. “It’s going to get colder soon, too."

Russ’ jacket is unceremoniously dropped onto your shoulders.

“sorry it reeks,” he apologizes.

“… Russ?”

“y’ were pokin’ outta yer shirt.”

 _Oh_. “Sorry, didn’t expect to be coming out here,” you say, pulling your arms through the sleeves of the warm fur-lined jacket. Maybe you should’ve grabbed a robe or something before coming downstairs, but then again, you didn’t expect to not be alone.

“’s fine,” he shrugs. He puts his cigarette out against the brick and goes to tuck it away, realizing too late that he’s not wearing his coat all of a sudden.

You chuckle, going to take the jacket off. “I’m going to head back to bed anyways.”

Before you can, though, he grips the open sides of it up by the collar, his reddish-orange eye lights staring down at your face for a moment too long.

“… Russ?”

Then he slowly slides it off of you, and throws it over his shoulder.

“… night,” he says, stepping back inside.

Huh. _That_ was a bit weird. Maybe Russ is just tired too.

When you get back to bed, this time you dream about chasing three adorable little skeleton children around this massive house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Russ _*internally*_ : i need to unwind after having a sex dream about my brother's girlfriend.
> 
> Brother's girlfriend: What did you dream about?
> 
> Russ _*internally screaming*: i can't tell you that you're literally the last person on earth i wanted to see right now._
> 
> Reader: _*is cold*_
> 
> Russ: _*offers jacket*_
> 
> Russ _*internally*: great! **more** shit to fantasize about!! **i hate my entire life!!!**_
> 
> XD Also, some shit's about to kick off real soon. Maybe next chapter. I'll warn at the top.
> 
> And for the record, not sure kids or heats will happen in this fic. I could go either way on it, but what do you guys think?


	24. The Soulmate.*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **THIS is the chapter with the dubcon in it. Safe to read until "You're taken", then after that it's all sorts of bad. Kissing and groping of dubious consent from a stranger.**
> 
> I will put a brief description of what happens in the notes at the bottom if you would prefer to read that instead.

Sans never kicked you out of bed during the week you had your period, but you’d wait until he was asleep and head back to yours anyway just to be safe. He’d still smile at you when you came downstairs each morning to make breakfast together, so you know he wasn’t taking it personally. He never did anything to make you feel like anything was wrong, which you appreciated, and treated you to more cuddles on the couch when you wanted them and space for Nora to warm up your lap when you needed that instead. He was absolutely _great_ about it.

Once you’re over it though you are _so_ ready to go back to normal. You tell him as much after a long day at the embassy installing a secure file server and finagling other network stuff so that you can get some computers in here.

“I am _so_ tearing you out of that armour once we get home,” you announce.

He grins and reaches behind the plate to begin unclasping it. “WHY WAIT?” he grins.

Russ clears his throat. “you two ready t’ shortcut? or should i leave ya t’ find a broom closet ‘r somethin’?”

You blush furiously at that, while Sans seems to be weighing the merits between broom closet and bed at home. “THE BED _WOULD_ BE MORE COMFORTABLE, RIGHT?”

“Right,” you giggle. “Okay Russ, three to shortcut!”

“hold on tight,” he reminds you.

You hop onto Sans’ back and he easily bears your weight despite being a head shorter than you. He takes one of your hands that’s wrapped around his collarbone gently in his and holds Russ’ hand in his other.

In an instant you’re surrounded by the pitch darkness of the void, and it suddenly feels like your stomach drops right out of your body, followed by a searing heat in your middle that makes you feel like you’re splitting apart.

“ _Aahh!_ ” you cry out in surprise.

“_____-?”

Russ whips his head around and reaches for you, but a different set of hands grab you from behind instead.

You’re _taken_. _Ripped_ away from them at _breathtaking_ speed. You see Sans startle and turn to reach for you, but he’s already _so far_ from you, and then… He’s _gone_.

They’re _both_ just gone, and your soul is _sweltering_.

“ ** _Shh._** ”

Hard arms wrap themselves around your middle as sharp teeth graze the sensitive flesh of your neck. It sends a sharp erotic _jolt_ throughout your entire being as you instinctively calm and relax. Your soul is burning urgently, but not as _painfully_ as before.

Part of you wants to struggle and fight, get away, get back to Sans and Russ somehow, but… It’s a surprisingly small part. The rest of you is _wanting_ this, is _savouring_ it, to a degree of intensity that you’ve never felt with _anyone_ before… Not even your _soulmate_ , Sans.

The hands move to grab wantingly at your body, a thumb dipping into the bands of your pants and underwear, and the other hand traveling up your shirt to gently squeeze you over your bra. You feel a hard body press into your back – you can feel broad, strong ribs through their shirt. As their groping gets more insistent, you find yourself moaning, tears forming at the corners of your eyes because you’re not sure you _want_ this, even though the rest of you is _screaming_ that you _do_.

You want _Sans_ … Don’t you?

“Who… Who _are_ you?” you choke out, the words feeling weak and helpless as they leave your mouth. “Show yourself… _Please_.”

“ **As you wish.** ”

He has an _extremely_ handsome voice – it melts like butter over your whole being when he speaks, warm and all-encompassing and _inexplicably_ erotic.

He turns you around in the air, the void having a weightlessness to it that has always given you a slight sense of vertigo when using Russ’ ability to shortcut. When you see him, you gasp as tears spill freely from your eyes.

It feels like you’ve waited your _entire life_ for this person. He makes you feel complete in ways you couldn’t even begin to describe. His phalanges interlaced with your fingers feels so right, his hands on your body feel hotter than the surface of the sun, and his mouth closing in on yours tastes like destiny.

You struggle and fight with yourself to push him away, resting your hand against his chest as he occupies your mouth, hard fingers making quick work of your buttoned shirt as he moves to undress you.

… Everything feels amazing, feels perfect, feels _right_ , in ways you just aren’t able to comprehend. You… You _need_ to _stop_ this somehow. But you don’t _want_ to.

Why don’t you want to?? You feel paralyzed under his ministrations and that quietly terrifies you, even as you find your own hands trembling as you clumsily work his black dress shirt off of his body as well.

Gravity suddenly becomes a thing again as you’re moved to lie back on a large bed, and you gasp as your back crashes into the crisp, cool sheets.

It’s enough of a shock to your system that you’re able to defy whatever’s happening here, and you form a barrier to push him away.

“ _Stop_ …” you cry. “I don’t know what’s happening, just… Just stop it, _please!_ ”

A jolt of agony runs through your soul at pushing him off, and he groans and holds the space below his sternum as well.

“ ** _Aaah_ … My love, _please_ ,**” he begs you in turn, crawling onto the bed with you between your knees.

“Just tell me who you are!” you demand.

He blinks his sockets hard, eyes like pricks of sunlight staring back at you from cracked sockets on a ridiculously handsome face. “ **Is it not obvious? You _must_ feel it too,**” he reasons.

“Feel _what?_ ” you protest. “ _Explain_.”

“ **Your soul _called_ to me, I… I am your _soulmate_.**”

Fire burns in your soul as you keep him at a distance with your barrier. “I don’t… That can’t be _right_ , though,” you shake your head, insistent. “I already _have_ a soulmate!”

… You’ve felt some things with Sans here and there, mostly… Spicy butterflies under his touch, happy tingles here and there when you see him smile or he holds your hand. You’ve felt pangs of emptiness when away from him sometimes too, that seemed to distantly hurt.

… But _nothing_ like the intensity of emotions you have with this new person. _Never_ anything this profoundly _powerful_.

… You’re forced to admit that it _must_ be true, even as you’re still trying to deny it. The closer he comes to you the more that well of intensity opens back up again. You can even feel your soul _begging_ for him to be closer, the excited crackles of passion billowing out of it.

The barrier you put up between you shatters, though you’re not sure which one of you is responsible for it as his mouth is on yours again. You can sense that he’s… _Unthinkably_ _powerful_. He takes you by the shoulder with a hand and guides you to lie back on the bed, and you go easily, as his other squeezes the flesh of your thigh.

He breaks off the kiss and you find yourself jerking towards him for more, but he places his mouth at your neck again.

“ **I have waited _so long_ to have you like this, my dear…**” he breathes past your ear. 

“I don’t even know who you _are_ ,” you whimper.

He withdraws slowly, looking you in the eyes and caressing your face. His expression is half-lidded, as if drunk on your presence. “ **… There is a way that I could show you,** ” he claims, his tone bittersweet. “ **My soul is _demanding_ it, and it might bring us both a great deal of relief.**”

“… What is it?”

“ **We could soulbond,** ” he offers.

You don’t know why that sounds like the best thing ever right now, nor why your soul cries in pain as you immediately try to consciously reject the idea. “Aah, _oww_ … I don’t _think_ …”

“ **Then _don’t_ think,**” he counters, his voice smoother than silk. “ **Just tell me your answer.** ”

“… What does it…? _How_ does it…?”

He settles in against you again, pinning you beneath him. He keeps his hands mostly to himself this time, but steals another long kiss before whispering into your ear again, threading his hands into your hair.

“ **My instincts tell me that the process is simple,** ” he coos. “ **But it requires the consent of both parties. As we are bonded, you will experience all of my memories, everything I have done in my life up to this moment… It will show you _exactly_ what kind of man I am. As my soulmate, you should know… What I have been responsible for.**”

And he would have all of _your_ memories too, but… Are you really ready for such a big step?

He sits up, kneeled between your legs, and you find yourself reaching for him reflexively. He interlaces his phalanges with your fingers again, gently pinning one of your hands to the bed. His other rests over your stomach, and you feel your soul jerk upwards to meet his hand. You place your hand over top of his.

“ **I must ask you, do you trust me?** ” he asks.

You don’t know _why_ you say it. You fight with every fibre of your being that’s still under your conscious, rational control. But you lose.

“Y… _Yes_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Description of what happens in this chapter:** While going through a regular shortcut, an unfamiliar pair of arms take you away from the boys in the void. The new skeleton man (yes it's Gaster) molests you and your soul urges you to enjoy it, but you feel strongly conflicted about it given that you thought Sans was your soulmate. The man announces that _he_ is your soulmate instead, explaining why you want him, and why it hurts when you reject him. He offers to soulbond with you to ease the pain you're both feeling and so you will get a complete picture of who he is, and you're unable to say anything but yes.
> 
>  _Oof_. This was simultaneously a fun and yet _horrible_ chapter to write. This was a plot development that I only came up with a week ago, but while I knew it would be triggering I still wanted to explore it - the idea of a _true_ soulmate that isn't who you expected or wanted, but that your soul powerfully disagrees with you on.
> 
> **Warning for next chapter as well: You see his memories, and in them, people die. Then you're back in his arms feeling just as molested as before.**


	25. The Soulbond.*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Warning! Flashbacks of Gaster's past where it's implied directly or indirectly that he's killed a lot of people including at least one of the fallen human children, and then more groping to follow.**
> 
> Chapter description to follow in the end notes.

“One day we’ll be together Wingding, just you wait!”

“ **… But-** “

“Liara saw it in one of her visions. She said it’s going to take a long time, but we’re practically _destined_ to be together!”

* * *

“ **do as you’re told, wingding. you wouldn’t want to make your father _upset_ now, would you?**”

“ **… yes mom.** ”

“ **honestly, you _boys_. i hardly know what to do with you. fetch your brother and make sure you wash up before dinner.**”

* * *

“ **i don’t think i’m going to marry senna.** ”

“ ** _WHAT!?_ WHY _NOT?_ SHE’S A MAGE _AND_ SHE _ADORES_ YOU!**”

“ **… well… i don’t know how _i_ feel about, um… also, i heard the chieftan talking – he wants her to marry the prince.**”

“ **PRINCE MINOS?? WELL, DON’T WORRY LITTLE BROTHER! I’LL TAKE CARE OF EVERYTHING!** ”

“ **what?? courier, _wait_ -**“

* * *

“Now, why does a scrawny little bag o’ bones like you wanna join the Royal Guard?”

“ **General Gerson, sir- is that a serious question?** ”

“’Course it is! It’s the most _important_ question-”

“ **We’re in the middle of a _war!_ King Asterion’s been dusted by human hands, and my… My _brother_ , as well. We need capable fighters on the front lines if we’re going to win-!**”

“Is that _you_ talkin’ junior, or are those your _father’s_ words?”

* * *

“ **… Senna??** ”

“Wingding! Um… I brought fruit?”

“ **How did you get through the barrier? Tell me _now!_** ”

“… I’m sorry. I put a couple of conditions on it.”

“ ** _What_ conditions?**”

“Well… Anything can enter, nothing can leave.”

“ **…** ”

“… _Except_ , a monster _and_ a human working together could.”

“ **What would it take to _destroy_ it?**”

“… Seven humans, or their souls, since we had as many mages when I made it.”

“ **We’re going to _die_ in here, Senna! What were you _thinking!?_** ”

“I didn’t have a _choice!_ I’m _sorry_ , okay!? They told me I _had_ to or they were going to-“

“ ** _Why_ are you _here!?_** ”

“I WANTED TO SEE _YOU!_ ”

“ **…** ”

“… We can run away… If you take my hand, we can pass through the barrier together…”

“ **… You trapped yourself here for my sake.** ”

“Of course! Wingding, I _never_ wanted _any_ of this to happen! We were supposed to be _together_ , _remember?!_ I lo-“

“ **Seven human souls will destroy the barrier, correct?** ”

“Yes, but- Wait, what are you-“

“ **Thank you for the information, Senna.** ”

“Wing-! **_AAAAAAAAAAHHH!!_** ”

“ **It, _and_ your human soul, will be very useful to us.**”

“… _Ding_ , I _can’t_ \- _Why_ …?”

“ **… One down, six to go.** ”

* * *

“King Minos is gunna need capable boss monsters at his side, junior. You sure you’re up to the task?”

“ **Are you rescinding your title of General?** ”

“Heh, don’t get _cocky_ , kiddo. I may _look_ over a hundred years old but I’m just as spry as ever. I’m just not cut out for this line of work anymore, y’see. Especially not with us monsters at each other’s throats over what few resources a cave can provide.”

“ **Kill or be killed _was_ the decree.**”

“Yes, I’m well aware. So, did ya want the job or what?”

“ **… You mean to say, General of the Royal Guard?** ”

“Yeah! General Junior. Sounds fun, don’t it?”

“ **Perhaps… How would General _Gaster_ sound to you, instead?**”

“Garamond’s been dust for ‘bout fourty years, now. I don’t see _him_ coming back from the dead to take over my old job!”

“ **Of _course_ not, but… It _does_ have a certain ring to it, does it not?**”

“… Well, you always _did_ take after yer father, son. Always thought that was a shame.”

* * *

“ _BOOM!!_ HAHAHAHA!”

“ **I see you are enjoying yourself as always, Tethis.** ”

“Are you _kiddin’ me_ Gaster? This is my favourite part o’ the job!”

“ **Did you have any luck with that side project I assigned you?** ”

“Yer ‘floaty laser death skulls’ thing? Kinda.”

“ **… ‘Kinda’?** ”

“I _might_ need another sample o’ yer magic to get the _aesthetic_ you were lookin’ for, but I’ve already worked out the basics pretty much.”

“ **Fascinating. Once you are finished with that, I have another idea or two in the works…** ”

* * *

“piss off.”

“ **Is that any way to speak to the General of the Royal Guard?** ”

“it’s a way to speak to entitled _pricks_ like _you_ , yeah.”

“ **Exactly _how long_ do you think you will be able to survive on the streets of the Capitol before some monster comes along and dusts you for sport? My offer is time limited, and I have already been _exceptionally_ generous in your case.**”

“don’t care. go find someone else to bother.”

“ **Arial, be _reasonable_ -**“

“ _fuck off, dingus._ i ain’t _having_ kids and that’s _final_. you’ve checked my soul about a dozen times by now – i’m a weak regular monster and you _know_ it. if i tried to get _pregnant_ i’d probably dust before it was born. i’d rather die in a fight out here than cooped up in your stupid _loser_ _mansion_ trying to be something i’m _not_. so for the last _fucking_ time, _piss off_ – go find somebody _else_ to fuck you for a _bribe_.”

* * *

“ **I trust that you will keep this under the _strictest_ confidentiality?**”

“… The King doesn’t even know, _does_ he?”

“ **That is not your concern.** ”

“Right, _‘course_ it ain’t. Well… I’ll see what I can do.”

“ **Thank you, Tethis. You have been a very reliable friend all of these years.** ”

“’Friend’, right… One question before y’ go?”

“ **… I suppose it could not hurt.** ”

“What happened to Arial?”

* * *

“ **How is your business out in Snowdin these days? I trust that things have been going well for you?** ”

“Ahuhuhuhu~! You could say that!”

“ **I am sure your carrot pastries have captivated the local population?** ”

“You _flatter_ me Gaster, but you’re not here for small talk, _are_ you?”

“ **… I suppose there never _is_ time for it, is there? Do you have it?**”

“Here you are! Tucked away safely inside this chest.”

“ **Appreciated-** “

“Hold on just _one_ second there, _General!_ Aren’t you _forgetting_ something?”

“ **Of course. Here you are. I will have the rest of your payment within a few days.** ”

“Make sure you do! I _never_ forgive a _tab_ , ahuhuhu~!”

* * *

“ **My ‘children’ are looking well. You have outdone yourself once again, Royal Scientist.** ”

“… The li’l one kinda _reminds_ me o’ someone.”

“ **I beg your pardon?** ”

“… Nothin’. Nevermind.”

* * *

“It’s just a _child!_ ”

“ **Their soul will work just as well as an adult’s, my Queen.** ”

“Gaster, how _could_ you-“

“ **Condolences and regrets over what happened to your son, Your Majesty, but what would you have me do? The human was trapped here with no hope for escape, and had other monsters heard word that there was a human alive down here… Taking their soul before they could be discovered was a mercy.** ”

“… _Fine_. Just… Put it with the others, then _get out of my sight_.”

“ **As you wish.** ”

* * *

“WHY DOES THE QUEEN WANT HUMANS?”

“ **To free us from this underground prison, of course. Should you ever find a human wandering around down here, you must bring them to the Queen without delay. Notify your brother and myself as well so we can ensure your safe escort.** ”

“AND THEN I CAN BECOME PART OF THE ROYAL GUARD?”

“ **Of _course_ , my dear child. If you brought Her Majesty the final human needed to destroy the barrier, how could she _possibly_ refuse you?**”

* * *

Your body feels _hot_.

A prickly, excessive _warmth_ floods every inch of you from the top of your head to the ends of your toes, as if bathed in the needles of a cactus on fire. You also feel heavy and like you’re feeling every emotion all at once, over a _thousand years_ of emotion, condensed down into one _second_ of all-encompassing feeling.

You feel hot tears on your cheeks next, and pools of it in your hair on the bed beneath you.

And then you feel someone kissing you, and your soul responding with more warmth that sends electric sensation downward. A hard hand feels hot against your hip, greedily squeezing at your bare flesh.

Your alarm bells are ringing, but they feel muted and distant somehow, as if they’re underwater. What happened to your pajama pants, and… Why don’t you want this to _stop?_

You press a hand against his ribs to push him away, and it goes limp as he quickly takes it in his phalanges, your resolve completely faltering under his touch.

… You finally figure out what to do.

You create a barrier inside his ribs and pull him off and away of you. He gasps as he is suddenly wrenched from you, flashing sharp teeth that were only a moment ago tenderly cradling your tongue.

“S-stop,” you pant, scrambling away to sit against the headboard. “I w-want you to _stop_ , okay? Just _stop_.”

Your pants were pulled down, but not completely off, and your underwear is all right where it should be – once you’re aware of this fact, you quickly pull them back in place and button your cardigan back up, hugging your arms to your stomach as it immediately fills with pain.

He hunches over too as he dismisses your barrier, cradling an area below his ribs as if it agonizes him.

“ **My _soul_ ,**” he pants, that husky cultured voice of his sending more pleasing vibrations through your body. “ **I’m sorry, I was overwhelmed and… Acting on instinct. My soul… _Needs_ to be close to yours.**”

Your soul is practically _screaming_ at you for having pushed him away too. You cover your ears and squeeze your eyes shut, but that only seems to make it hurt worse.

A hand touches your shoulder and you lean into it automatically before you can even think. It’s radiating a more pleasing warmth than the hot and firey pokers in your abdomen right now, but those also seem to ebb as he settles in to sit next to you. He interlaces the hard fingers of his hand with yours and you both sigh together in temporary relief.

“… What did you _do_ to me?” you demand, more tears spilling from your eyes.

“ **You wanted to know what kind of man I was,** ” he says, his words falling over you like honey. “ **You should have seen everything by now. … I, also saw _your_ past.**”

“I don’t… I _don’t_ want to talk about it.”

“ **Of course, my love.** ”

“Don’t. Just… _Don’t._ ”

“ **What would you have me do otherwise?** ”

“Sit there and _shut up_.”

He rumbles a deep chuckle that absolutely makes you melt. “ **Anything for you, _____.** ”

You want to start screaming, but it dies before it leaves your throat. This must prove it then… Sans was never your _real_ soulmate, this guy that dragged you into the void is.

And your real soulmate is _pure fucking **evil**_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Description of what happens:** You get a snapshot view of Gaster's past, from when he lived on the surface up to shortly before the monsters were freed. A human mage named Senna falls for him though he's disinterested, and he has a brother named Courier who ships them. Later as the war starts up and Courier dies, Wingding blames Senna for it and kills her after she gives him the information he needs to destroy the barrier - seven human souls will do it, and hers is the first. Gaster inherits the rank of General from Gerson, and uses his power and influence to bend the underground to his bidding. He accosts a woman named Arial who refuses him, and she later disappears. He finds and kills one of the fallen human children, bringing the body and soul to the Queen, who is still traumatized over the loss of her son. Later, his sons are created by the Royal Scientist Tethis, though she's clearly made uncomfortable by the process and blames Gaster for Arial's disappearance.
> 
> A lot of this is borrowing from canon that I developed for NYD actually - Senna, the human mage with solid magic that had a crush on Wingding and was responsible for the barrier, Tethis, Undyne's mom, Arial, the skele-mom of the boys, Garamond, his abusive dad, and Courier, his older brother and proud Royal Guardsman. I had a fic in the works to go through the history piece by piece for my other fic, NYD: Gaster Timeline, but its been sitting idle for years, as have most of my other big stories ^-^;;
> 
> The next chapter they'll talk, and go into more detail about what each of them saw during the soulbond. He's _still_ touchy-feely though but Reader finally begins to accept it a bit more.


	26. The Maelstrom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More Gaster at the start though things have calmed down and he's being much less grabby.

At some point you decided to lie down on the massive bed and Gaster silently followed you, holding you from behind with his mouth against your neck, gently playing with strands of your hair and occasionally leaving a soft kiss against your skin. Your soul is still in agony, but it’s obviously far better when he’s close to you and you just blandly accept his affections.

“Why did you kill Senna?” you finally ask, having spent a long time thinking through all of the memories you saw.

There’s a long pause. “ **She was the one responsible for trapping my people underground,** ” he explains softly.

“She _loved_ you.”

“ **She… Was foolish,** ” he sighs. “ **I never once returned her affections, but she was _obsessed_ with earning mine. When we met I was too young to be courting anyone.**”

You roll over so you can look him in the eye sockets. His warm golden eye lights seem brighter in delight when they fall on your face, and he catches one of your hands in his to lace his hard phalanges in between your soft fingers.

“It seemed like she didn’t _want_ to do what she did, that she felt really guilty for it,” you observe.

“ **She did not, but… That did not change how I felt about what had happened,** ” he explains. “ **I lost everyone dear to me in that war.** ”

“Why didn’t you leave the underground with her?”

“ **Humans would have found us eventually. It would have been a death sentence. As I said, she was _very_ foolish.**”

You think he may be right about that. You saw the war from start to finish – if he _had_ taken her offer and ran away, how much would have changed?

“ **You moved back to Ottawa despite your misgivings about Drew finding you again,** ” he highlights. “ **Why run the risk?** ”

“ _Ugh_ ,” you cringe, and he chuckles warmly, caressing your face to comfort you. “Hope that he forgot about ever seeing me again, knowing I had nothing left in London besides my house anyways, plus I live clear across town – much harder to run into each other that way.”

That’s right – you own a house in London, and live in Ottawa with your dog Nora. Sans and Russ, too – whom you’ve just learned are Gaster’s artificially created _children_.

“… Why did you… _Do_ that, to _Arial?_ She just wanted to be left alone.”

You feel his hard fingers on your face brushing the tears away before you can even feel the heat behind them.

“ **… We only needed two more souls to secure our freedom from that place,** ” he says, his expression soft, showing the faintest signs of regret and remorse. “ **Tethis and I were preparing for the war to begin anew, so we needed more capable soldiers. More boss monsters, of which there were _very_ few remaining, in order to have the best chance at victory.**”

You find yourself idly tracing the cracks in his face – battle scars from the war, you now realize. He sighs warmly at your touch.

“It never would have worked with how many humans there are now,” you point out.

“ **I know that _now_ , having seen the surface through your memories,**” he concedes.

He brings your hand to his mouth to kiss it.

“ **My love,** ” he hums warmly. “ **I know that I have done a… Great _many_ terrible things in my life. But with you here, I feel for the first time in my long life that I may _somehow_ be redeemed at _last_.**”

“… We’re _never_ getting out of here, _are_ we?” you ask, a sob caught in your throat.

“ **Unfortunately that is the one thing that is beyond my power – only my son Papyrus has the ability to pass to and from the void,** ” he says, wiping your face and shushing you. “ **It is not so awful, after all – I still retain all of the power from when I destroyed the barrier, and I have learned how to create many things here in the void so that it is not quite so empty.** ”

He sits up and you find yourself automatically reaching for him. He takes your hand delicately in his, a playful smile on his face. “ **Come, my dear. Let me show you what I have done with the place.** ”

* * *

“WHERE DID _____ GO??”

Mutt drops to his knees on the kitchen floor, hands balled into fists.

“PAPY, SHE WAS JUST-“

“i know.”

“DID SHE LET GO? IS SHE LOST IN THE VOID??”

He can’t answer.

“… WE HAVE TO GO GET HER!”

“we can’t.”

“WHY NOT? _PAPYRUS??_ ”

His soul throbs at the loss of you.

“we just _can’t_.”

“BUT WHAT ABOUT-“

“ _forget_ her.”

“SHE’S MY _SOULMATE_ , I CAN’T- IT ALREADY _HURTS_ -!”

“it’ll go away with time.”

“WE CAN’T JUST _LEAVE_ HER THERE-“

“we **have** to.”

“PAPYRUS WE _CAN’T!_ WHAT ARE YOU _SAYING?!_ ”

“i’m saying **forget it**. you will in a few days, anyways.”

“ ** _WHY?_** ”

“ **because we _can’t!_** ”

Mutt recoils as his magic angrily lashes out, pouring out of him in barely-formed attacks and shredding the cupboards surrounding them both into kindling. The fridge door is torn away in the maelstrom of power like tissue paper, tumbling around and shredding itself into scrap along with the lights from the crystal chandelier above them, shattering into sparks and glass. Sans has already gotten some distance, a wall of bones separating him from his brother, whose uncontrolled rage is still sending wild, chaotic waves of magic into everything around him.

“ **that psychopath _bastard’s_ got her now and we have _no hope in hell_ of _ever_ beating him so we can take her back! it’s _fucking suicide_ and we’re better off _stranding_ her there and _forgetting she ever existed_ because there is _no way_ i am _ever_ letting _him out_ of the _fucking void!!_** ”

Sans finds an opening, deflecting debris from the maelstrom with some well-aimed attacks of his own. He pounces on Mutt’s chest and pins him to the floor, then holds up a hand and knocks his hand against the air.

It’s a non-verbal tap out signal from when they used to practice fight and train together. It’s also one of the few things that can get Mutt’s magic to calm itself down. A show of vulnerability from his younger brother that says he might be seriously injured if they continue.

The maelstrom subsides, debris falling to the floor harmlessly. The floor is wet beneath him as water pools from the destroyed sink.

“PAPY,” Sans breathes, relieved that the worst is over but no less determined. “ _WHO’S_ GOT HER?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, this is all the stuff that I pre-wrote a couple days ago, so I'm just going to rapid-fire release these chapters until I'm out of material. Don't worry, we'll get back to the good parts real soon :)


	27. The Missing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sads ahead. Russ and Sans are at odds about what to do and grapple with your absence.

“I DON’T EVEN REMEMBER _ANY_ OF THAT.”

“count yerself lucky.”

“ _THAT’S_ HOW THE BARRIER WAS DESTROYED?”

Mutt nods, taking a drag of his Echoflower cigarette. They’d decided to take the conversation outside where they have to watch Nora do her business, since all of your barriers have disappeared along with you. He should _really_ get that damn fence built, he thinks.

“yeah,” he sighs. “i caught ‘im by surprise right after he did it. hoped that was the end ‘f it.”

“AND… HE STILL HAS THE SEVEN HUMAN SOULS BOUND TO HIM?”

“as _if_ he’d let go o’ _that_ kinda power once he got ahold of it,” he curses. “he’d planned to take it for ‘imself from th’ start.”

“… WE STILL HAVE TO DO _SOMETHING_ ,” Sans resolves.

“i told ya, we _can’t_.” Mutt puts the cig out against the brick of the house, then tucks it into a pocket. “he’s jus’ too strong, we ain’t got a chance o’ fighting ‘im.”

“MAYBE FIGHTING ISN’T HOW WE APPROACH IT, THEN,” Sans muses thoughtfully. “WHAT IF WE COULD BARGAIN WITH HIM?”

“there ain’t nothin’ ‘e wants, ‘sides _____ i guess.” He nods his head upwards towards the dog as she approaches, sliding the patio door open for her as she scampers through ahead of them.

“IF HE RELEASED THE HUMAN SOULS, GAVE UP HIS POWER, THEN MAYBE IT COULD BE SAFE TO BRING HIM BACK OUT OF THE VOID ALONG WITH _____,” Sans reasons.

Mutt scoffs. “yer as crazy as he is.”

“WELL! IF YOU’VE GOT A BETTER IDEA-!”

“already do. we leave it.”

Sans grabs him roughly by the arm, forcing him to face him. “I DON’T ACCEPT THAT!”

Mutt shakes him off. “he’d never accept a deal like that. ‘sides, ‘e’s been in th’ void too long as it is – all that _time_ ’d catch up t’ him an’ he’d dust if ‘e ever left.”

His brother blinks in disbelief. “SO- IF WE _LEFT_ _____-“

“th’ same ’d happen to her, too.”

* * *

Sans had pulled out all the stops to try and convince Papy to take them on a rescue mission for you in the void. But by the third day, he was getting tired.

He knew time was of the essence, but Papyrus was unshakeable on this. He absolutely refused to let the monster out of its cage. Sans has never seen Papy so _afraid_ before, noticing his brother’s hands trembling whenever he spoke about him, and yet he still has no memories of who this ‘Gaster’ person even was.

He was the General of the Royal Guard – and, apparently, his and his brother’s father, of sorts. He had been the one to teach him how to capture humans alive and get them to the Queen without being noticed by other monsters, and he only imparted that knowledge to Sans in the hopes of absorbing the seven human souls all for himself, giving himself the powers of a god.

Papy said that Gaster had a soul of Pride – meaning that Justice and Bravery were his secondary aspects. But he said it was a perverted sense of Justice, and he had a strong sense of his tertiary aspects – Wrath and Greed.

His soul misses you, but it doesn’t hurt as much as that first day. _He_ misses you too, of course, but he’s already starting to forget what you look like.

And Nora’s been waiting by the front door ever since, crying every so often as if waiting for you to come home. He’d put some blankets on the floor for her to curl up on so she wasn’t sitting on the hard tile all day, along with some food and water nearby so she doesn’t starve herself.

Sans kneels down beside her, scratching her neck as she stirs and yawns.

“… COME ON, PUP. TIME FOR BED.”

* * *

Mutt found your diary.

Since the barrier around your room disappeared with you, he figured there was only a limited amount of time before all of your things started fading away too, as if you’d never existed. He’s still not sure what’s going to happen to the house in your absence, or what’s going to happen to the embassy – Sans has pretty well stopped talking to him entirely since he refused to go on an insane rescue trip to the void.

He _knows_ Gaster will kill him on sight for what he’s done – he might kill Sans first, and make it _last_ , _just_ to make him suffer for his treachery. He knows _exactly_ how to twist Sans’ ability to get the most pain out of him possible before he dusts. 

… Your room, and the pack of Echoflower cigs on the bed next to him, are helping to keep him calm. He can’t let his magic get out of control like that again. Sans could get hurt.

Your diary is interesting to him. You have so many thoughts in your head and it’s evident that you struggle to get them all down onto paper. It reminds him of Sans when he was younger. You talk about the kinds of dreams you have, about things left unsaid from the day, about something cute his brother said or did. There are also things that you remember from your past that you don’t quite know how to grapple with, but you write them down anyways just to get the thoughts out of your head. If you could distill the essence of yourself, of your very _soul_ , into one little book, you’ve done it. He’s read it about a dozen times since you were grabbed and disappeared in the void.

He reaches the last page again, with Monday’s date on it. You finally got the cameras running on a demo mode and were working on securing it over an internet feed with Undyne. You’re excited to finally be done with this project so you can do something else, and just need to confirm a couple of security things that you write down to remind yourself of.

And then the next page is blank.

… It’s Friday.

“… PAPY?”

He shuts the journal and tucks it back away in the hidden drawer under your bed.

“yeah, bro?”

“MY SOUL HURTS, AND IT’S _WORSE_ THAN BEFORE. … I _THOUGHT_ YOU SAID THIS WOULD GET BETTER OVER TIME,” he complains.

… That’s weird. His own soul has been complaining _less_ over time.

… Maybe Sans got a bigger chunk of Gaster than he did.

“… you remember why?” Mutt asks curiously. He _should_ be forgetting you by now. It only took about a week before the Queen stopped asking for the General and for Sans to stop flinching at shadows.

“YEAH, IT’S BECAUSE WE LEFT _____ BEHIND IN THE VOID,” he huffs indignantly.

… Strange. His soul is still trying to resonate with yours, even though it can’t reach you.

Sans grits his teeth together. “IT FEELS LIKE I’M COMING APART AT THE SEAMS. I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO,” he says, sounding pained.

Wait… Because you’re technically soulmates with Sans, could the separation be _killing_ him?

Mutt whips out an Echoflower cig from the pack and quickly lights it with the lighter tucked into your nightstand. He takes a long puff and savours it before standing up.

“a’right, fine… if we’re _doin’_ this dumb thing, i gotta be stoned outta my _fuckin’_ _mind_ , first.”

Sans eyes him, confused. “IF WE’RE DOING… _WHAT_ DUMB THING?”

“whaddaya think?” he says, taking another long drag. “we’re savin’ yer soulmate.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I fucking bawled when I wrote this chapter, but at least it ends on a _high_ note ;)


	28. The Dance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reader begins warming up to Gaster as he shows her around the void.

“… I _definitely_ dreamed this.”

You’re standing in an _enormous_ ballroom. It’s got giant crystal chandeliers twinkling with light pouring in from windows surrounding it on all sides, the walls are intricately carved with filigrees and painted in reds, oranges, and golds, in a very classical look. Some panels have carved arches with muted oil paintings of angels in blue skies or of lush green countrysides and farmers tending their fields.

You know the sunlight coming through the windows isn’t the _real_ sun – you’re still in the void, so it’s a facsimile of what it would be like in the physical world – but it feels just as warm and invigorating on your skin as the real thing.

Gaster _made_ this… Just like he made the bed, and the few other rooms he’s shown you. His magic became so powerful when he absorbed the souls that he can literally _create_ things from _nothing_ , in a void that _literally was nothing_ until he was left here by Russ.

“ **I may have had a hand in that,** ” he chuckles handsomely. “ **Do you like it?** ”

“It’s a bit gaudy if I’m being honest here,” you laugh. “ _Really_ not my style.”

“ **I suspected as much,** ” he grins.

“It’s… Not _awful_ , though,” you add, marveling at the crystal lights hanging overhead. “And here I thought the _void_ was unending.”

“ **It is a combination of ideas,** ” he says, stepping over to you and placing his hands on your shoulders, speaking into your hair behind your ear. “ **There is a particular hallway in the castle that I borrowed inspiration from – the only place in the entire underground that gets natural sunlight, but only at particular times of the day.** ”

“You spent a _lot_ of time there,” you remember from his memories. He was up at dawn every day just to sit in that hallway and bask in the sun, and then every night at dusk he’d delay in passing through it at the closing of his duties. The windows were made of sulfur-stained glass from Hotland, giving the light a more yellow hue to it.

“ **Indeed. Then, well… There were very few items of human art history that fell underground all of those years – I suspect the humans dwelling on the surface above us simply did not care much for it.** ”

“… I think I see it now – all the classical art influences in your paintings,” you say, pointing ahead at the one of the angel. “That – _yeah_ , it’s coming to me now…”

“ **It is a nod towards Michelangelo’s painting of the ceiling in the Sistine Chapel,** ” he beams, sounding very satisfied with himself.

“But at least your angel is wearing clothes,” you chuckle.

He wraps his arms around your middle, kissing your neck where it meets your shoulder. “ **Might I interest you in a dance?** ”

“Oh _geez_ ,” you fluster, hiding your face with a hand. “I’m _really_ not that much of a dancer…”

“ **Nonsense,** ” he smirks, coming around you and taking your free hand in his. He puts a hand to his chest and bows slightly, and when he straightens again, he’s wearing a pressed black tuxedo, complete with a rose boutonniere.

You feel all of the blood rush to your face and you let out a whimper as you can hardly keep yourself from screaming. _Oh no he’s HOT!_

In spite of the flood of his memories, of his grabbing of you when he first stole you right off of Sans’ back, of the many horrible things he’s done in his life, and the fact that you’ve still only just met him… Against all common sense and rationality, you are _falling_ for Gaster and you are falling _fast_.

Your feelings for Sans are _nothing_ when compared to the unquenchable _fire_ in your soul when you look at Gaster.

You drop his hand and drop to hug your knees on the ballroom floor. “Give me a minute, I think you broke my brain,” you protest, _wheezing_.

He laughs good-naturedly at that. Even his _laugh_ is _hot_. “ **Take your time. Although… If we are to dance, perhaps you would like something _else_ to wear?**”

You stand back up, then look down at yourself and can’t help but agree. Pajama pants and a sweat-stained tank top just don’t quite fit the mood. “Uh, knock yourself out I guess… So long as I’m wearing _something_ at least, perv!”

In the next moment you find yourself wearing a gorgeous white bridal gown. You gasp.

“I saw this in a magazine _once_ – you really plucked this thing out of my _memories??_ ”

“ **You had turned to your coworker and told her that you were ‘definitely getting married in this’,** ” he grins. “ **It was one of my favourites. It… Is absolutely _stunning_ on you,**” he stumbles, covering his own face as it’s highlighted in golden magic. It seems you’re not the only one having problems.

“Why a _wedding_ dress, though? I mean, we’re already kind of moving pretty _fast_ here. You got a pastor and two witnesses ready to go down the hall somewhere?” you ask, pointing with a thumb behind you.

He composes himself and bows slightly, holding out his hand for yours again. You take it and he slowly draws you into his chest for a slow dance. You begin to hear soft classical music playing from nowhere, and you instinctively look around for it but can’t spot the source.

“ **Perhaps I should explain… A soulbond is a bit like marriage for monsters when they have found their soulmate,** ” he says softly to you, kissing your forehead as you slowly turn with the music together. “ **I suppose I am just excited to finally have you in my arms, my love. It feels as though I have waited _ages_ for you.**”

“How long _have_ you been stuck here, anyways?” you ask.

“ **It is impossible to tell – time does not pass normally in the void,** ” he explains. “ **It could be minutes, it could be months, it could even be years. My only frame of reference is that my son Papyrus must still be alive to have been able to bring you here, so your arrival falls within his expected lifespan.** ”

“Wait…” you say, stopping the dance and pushing away from him. “Wait a second… Time doesn’t _pass_ here??”

He massages the knuckles of the hand he still has hold of. “ **It does not, as it happens. But please, do not be afraid – in fact, due to the lack of a passage of time we will retain our youth and never die of old age. We never need to eat, drink, or sleep either, though we might be able to have children, if we desire. We have _eternity_ ahead of us, to spend with each other in any way we wish.**”

You yelp as he quickly scoops you up in his arms. He laughs at your frustrated look while you beat at his chest uselessly. “ **Come, my dear. I have seen you in that dress long enough already, and I have a mind to take you out of it.** ”

“Oh my _gods_ ,” you groan. You’re _so_ not mentally ready for skeleton sex, but apparently the rest of you _is_. How _dare_ he be able to speak and turn you on that quickly, it’s just not _fair_. “Gaster, I’m not sure I’m _ready_ for-“

“heh, mind if we cut in?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _There's_ our boys! Daring rescue mission: BEGIN!


	29. Shared Magic.*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **WARNING: Death and near-death experiences ahead, also Reader is in terrible pain.** Also Gaster really wants to fuck you ;D
> 
> I'm not going to put a short description of this chapter in the end notes because I think it's relatively safe enough to get through, plus the ending is pretty self-explanatory.

He sets you back on your feet and directs you behind him instantly. You stumble a bit on the short heels that came with your dress, but gain your balance by grabbing onto the back of his tux. Once you’re back on your feet, you take a look over his shoulder at…

 _SANS!_ _And_ _Russ!!_

You’ve _never_ been so happy to see them!

Your stomach immediately protests as your soul twists at the contradiction – you’re bonded to _Gaster_ , it tells you, so having feelings for anyone else causes you severe pain. Tears sting your eyes as you collapse to the floor holding your gut. What are you supposed to _do??_

Gaster seems to sense your trauma. He turns and kneels beside you, tucking your hair behind you ear. “ **It will be alright, my love,** ” he says in a low, soothing whisper that makes the pain melt into something like honey and bliss. “ **They will _not_ take you away from me.**”

“ _No_ …” you protest weakly. He stands to face them again and you cry out in pain.

You _want_ them to take you away from here. Back to the real world, back to your life, back to _Nora_.

“ _shit_ ,” Russ spits. “wasn’ expectin’ a soulbond. welp, we’re _fucked_.”

“Sans…”

Sans is holding his armour over his invisible soul as he looks at you, sighing in what seems to be relief. “YOU’RE OKAY,” he breathes.

Then he looks anxiously up at the monster between you.

“ **Papyrus is right – My soulmate and I are bonded now. If you attempt to separate us it could be fatal for my lovely _____. Is that a risk you are willing to take?** ”

“told ya i wanted t’ be stoned for this,” Russ chuckles. “i’d fuck off for ‘nother smoke but there ain’t nowhere to go.”

“SHE WAS… SHE WAS _MY_ SOULMATE FIRST!” Sans protests. You can almost feel the rage inside of him when he says it.

Wait. Do you still have some connection to Sans?

“ ** _Please_. She was always _my_ soulmate to begin with – your manufactured souls borrowed some of _my_ magic in their creation. You only _thought_ you were soulmates due to the remnants of my magic in your souls. You were _fake_ soulmates, at best.**”

Gaster picks you up off the floor and holds you against his chest, caressing your face and looking longingly into your eyes.

“ **What luck that _that_ should be why they took notice of you,**” he muses quietly.

“Stop…”

“ **I know that you do not want me to kill them, my love.** ”

… Wait… The violent, cold General of the Royal Guard you saw in his memories would _never_ spare someone that wronged him. What is he playing at?

“… You’ll spare them?”

Hope swells in your soul. Maybe he was serious about that redemption thing?

“ **Of course,** ” he grins. “ **I do not want to expose you to such violence.** ”

Then he holds out a hand, and both Russ and Sans are encased in magic barriers. Sans gasps and beats against the wall, while Russ kicks at his, then laughs.

“ **I will simply _hold_ them for a century or two, then their exit from the void will kill them instead.**”

“No!”

You push away from him, gasping in agony when you hit the hard floor. Your soul is burning angrily as you crawl away from Gaster towards Sans, who is kneeled inside of the barrier with his hands pressed against it, as if reaching for you.

“ **My dear, please leave them. You are only hurting us both by reaching for him. The bond _will_ _kill_ you if you reject me now.**”

“He was right- _AAAHH!!_ ” you cry out, holding your abdomen in pain. “He was… _Sans_ was my soulmate _first_.”

“ **He _never_ was, really. You can only have _one_ _true_ soulmate,**” Gaster reasons.

Your head turns at the sound of his voice on its own, but you snap your attention back to Sans, who’s shouting something at you, but you can’t hear it. The barriers are blocking all sound.

“ ** _Please_ , my love. I believe we were in the middle of something?**”

You just barely make it to the base of Sans’ barrier, reaching with a hand, but your fingers don’t quite graze the side of it. You feel like your insides are trying to tear their way out of your body.

Russ knocks on the side of his barrier for your attention.

You don’t hear it, but you catch the motion out of the corner of your eye. You turn your head to look at him. He kneels down and holds out his hands cupped together.

… Wait, that’s right…

When you first told him and Sans about your shields, you made a small ball in your hands to demonstrate it.

And that’s not _all_ Russ is reminding you of.

Gaster just used barrier magic. **_Your_** barrier magic.

Through a soulbond, you share _magic_.

“ **My love? If you do not come back over here, I _will_ have to come get you,**” he warns gently. “ **Let us not start our eternity together off on the wrong foot, shall we?** ”

You feel… _Determined_.

You find your strength to get back onto your feet, using some small barriers of your own to grab on to and pull you up the rest of the way.

Gaster smiles as he sees you turned to face him. “ **I am glad to see that you have come to your senses, my dear,** ” he says, holding out a hand for yours. “ **Let us forget about them and focus on enjoying each other for a while.** ”

Your soul tugs you towards him, but you don’t budge.

“ **… My love?** ”

You take a deep, steadying breath, even as your entire body trembles.

“… We share _magic_.”

You summon an enormous bone to impale him through the ribs. He gasps. You feel his terrible pain as even his _soul_ is impaled.

A halo of blasters surrounds him overhead, filling their mouths with light and firing in a deafening blast.

You feel the power of the seven human souls behind it all, and when the dust clears there’s only… _Dust_.

The barriers behind you shatter as you collapse to the ground in pain.

“holy _fuck_ darlin’ you vaporized ‘im.”

“_____, ARE YOU OKAY??”

Sans pulls you into his arms, brushing your hair from your face.

“i never heard of anyone _killin’_ their own bonded. _good job_.”

“I hurt… _Everywhere_ …” you moan.

“PAPY, WHAT’S WRONG WITH HER?”

“dunno, what’s yer magic tell ya?”

“SHE’S… SHE’S _DYING!_ ”

You can’t even keep your eyes open.

“figured. she killed ‘er bonded, now she’s toast.”

“WHAT DO WE DO??”

“ya could heal ‘er, or, ya could be crazy.”

“I CAN’T… CRAZY _HOW?_ ”

“y’ could soulbond ‘er. a fresh bond might stop 'er from fadin’ away.”

… _Another_ one?

“I don’t know if I can…”

“ya gotta consent if i’s gunna work, darlin’.”

“_____, _PLEASE!_ ”

“…”

“…- …!”

“………”

“………..!!”

“… Do it.”

That’s the last thing you remember.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Story's not over yet. More to come very shortly :)


	30. New Bonds.

“IS HE GONE??”

“looks like.”

“ _PHEW!!_ ”

“heh, y’know, if ya hate wearin’ that thing on yer head…”

“HE _MAKES_ ME WEAR IT, I HATE IT!”

“why don’t ya jus’ not?”

“EX- _CUSE ME_ , BUT NOT _EVERYONE_ HAS A BRAVERY SOUL LIKE YOURS!”

“ _wrath_ soul.”

“CLOSE ENOUGH!!”

“try it fer a day though. he ain’t gunna dust ya.”

* * *

“ **… Handwriting.** ”

“Y-Y-YES, FATHER?”

“ ** _Where_ is your scarf?**”

“I-IN THE WASH! IT WAS DIRTY.”

“ **Then you had _better_ find a replacement before you go out in public. Understood?**”

* * *

“listen ‘ere you miserable waste of space, if i told you once i told you a _dozen_ times – **_leave my sister alone._** ”

“PAPY-!”

* * *

“WHY DID YOU GO AND _DO_ THAT??”

“heh, s’ worth it.”

“YOU _IDIOT!!_ YOU’RE GOING TO GET KILLED ONE OF THESE DAYS, AND I’M- I’M NOT WORTH YOU _DYING_ OVER ME!!”

“’course ya are, sis. … hey, that scar is badass an’ all, but… why ain’t it healin’?”

“I USED… I MEAN I, SORT OF _LOANED_ YOU MY MAGIC, FOR A LITTLE WHILE.”

“ **… _what_.**”

“I-IT’S OKAY! I HAVE IT BACK, AND IT’S-IT’S _WORKING_ AGAIN, I JUST… UGH, IT’S PRETTY _BAD_ , RIGHT?”

“… handwriting.”

“ _PLEASE_ DON’T BE MAD. I COULDN’T… WHAT WOULD I DO WITHOUT YOU??”

“dab those tears b’fore father sees, yeah? we’ll sort this out later.”

“RIGHT. … _RIGHT._ ”

* * *

“ **You spend _far_ too much time with the Royal Scientist.**”

“yeah, i get that a lot. she’s got th’ coolest stuff though.”

“ ** _Well_ … Perhaps if I allow it you might _learn_ something.**”

“s’pose there’s always a chance o’ that.”

* * *

“ _STOP CALLING ME THAT._ ”

“what, li’l sis?”

“ _THAT_ , AND… _HANDWRITING_.”

“your _name?_ what’ll i call ya instead, then?”

“… SANS.”

* * *

“it looks better that way.”

“RIGHT??”

“yeah. yeah, i think it suits ya better, li’l bro.”

“YEAH! I THINK SO TOO!!”

“never seen ya so damn happy. it’s… nice.”

* * *

“I figured out what yer pops is doin’.”

“tch, what _isn’t_ ‘e doin these days.”

“I’m gonna confront him.”

“tha’s suicide.”

“I _HAVE_ TO! FOR TYTAN AND ALL THE OTHERS!”

“why’re ya tellin’ _me_ , then?”

“… Can ya look after Dyne for me?”

“… sans comes first.”

“HAH! Of course he does! I expected that from you. Just… Watch out for her from time to time, yeah?”

“… _fine_ , whatever.”

“… _Thank you_ , Mutt.”

“but i get the best pick o’ yer stuff when yer dust.”

* * *

“MWEHEHEHEH! HUMAN! YOU HAVE FALLEN FOR ANOTHER ONE OF MY CUNNING TRAPS! AS YOU CAN CLEARLY SEE, THIS PUZZLE DOESN’T HAVE A SOLUTION! THAT IS WHY YOU ARE STUCK ON THE SNOW PLATFORM, READY TO BE CAPTURED!”

“ya done good wit’ this one, bro.”

“DID MY VICTORY SPEECH SOUND OKAY?”

“needs a li’l work. but the trap’s solid.”

“YES! NOW WE JUST NEED A _REAL_ HUMAN TO FALL FOR IT!”

* * *

“found yer corpse room.”

“… _Excuse me??_ ”

“sorry. i found yer corpse room, _yer majesty_. … should i do a curtsy or somethin’ ta go wit’ it? doesn’ _feel_ like a _curtsy-ing_ mood.”

“And what do you intend to _do_ about it?”

“not sure. don’ overly care, honestly. human souls ‘ve gotta come from _somewhere_ , yeah? my _main_ concern is, how ‘m i s’posed ta tell my bro tha’ he’s leadin’ a human kid to their _death?_ ”

* * *

“Congratulations, Sans Aster. For capturing and safeguarding the final human soul to ensure our freedom, you will henceforth be known as the Royal Strategist. You will oversee our future campaign against the humans, my personal security detail, and will report directly to me.”

“…”

“Do you have nothing to say?”

“… THANK YOU, YOUR MAJESTY. I LOOK FORWARD TO WORKING WITH YOU.”

“I understand that it has been quite an eventful day for us. Do you like wine? I _might_ be persuaded to open a bottle to celebrate your new assignment.”

“… ONE GLASS SHOULD BE FINE. I SHOULD RETAIN A CLEAR HEAD SO AS TO FULFILL MY DUTIES TO THE BEST OF MY ABILITY.”

* * *

“sans, lookit this thing.”

“WHAT IS IT??”

“a toy. some kinda ugly monster-y lookin’ thing.”

“THE HUMANS HAVE TOYS OF MONSTERS ON THE SURFACE?? HOW STRANGE!”

“never seen a monster _that_ ugly. you?”

“MAYBE ALPHYS’ _MOM_.”

“ _oooh!_ hah, don’ let _‘er_ hear that. you _outrank_ ‘er, now.”

“Uhh, are you two done gawking at the happy meal toys or did you want to place an order?”

“we’ll take two alphys’ moms and ‘bout twenty burgers t’ go.”

“ _PFFTTT!_ ”

* * *

“DON’T YOU KNOW WHO YOU’RE TALKING TO??”

“Clearly I don’t, _junior_. How about everyone else?”

“W-well, as _IF_ we’d need any help from _some filthy human_ a-anyway!”

“Guess you’re all rude today. Not like we all didn’t just survive the same bus crash or anything…”

* * *

“I DON’T KNOW WHY THIS CROSSED MY MIND, BUT… DO YOU THINK… WAS THAT HUMAN AFRAID OF ME?”

* * *

“what ‘bout that camera there?”

“I paused the recording on that one. Pausing it means I don’t have to erase it later, which looks more suspicious in the logs than just not recording in the first place.”

“some quick thinkin’ there darlin’.”

* * *

“… I couldn’t.”

“IT’S JUST FABRIC, IT’LL WASH.”

* * *

“… What do you want to do Sans? It’s your show.”

“JUST… I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND.”

“… Yeah, I think I can do that.”

* * *

You struggle for consciousness, an oppressive light just above your head.

… Where _are_ you right now?

You feel delirious, your thoughts are lagged, and you don’t immediately feel the rest of your body.

Your soul is… _Numb_ , but somehow… _Happy?_

That’s some relief after what you’ve been through.

And you realize that there’s a familiar hand in yours.

His round head perks up when you try to squeeze his fingers with yours, but you just feel so _weak_ for some reason, you barely stroke the outside of his finger. He’s not wearing his gloves today, your lagged mind notices.

“YOU’RE AWAKE,” Sans says to you, as softly as he can manage. “THANK GOODNESS.”


	31. The Memories.

“What… Happened,” you struggle.

“IT’S A LONG STORY,” he says, his face turning indigo blue. “THE DOCTOR SAID THAT YOU MIGHT BE IN AND OUT OF SLEEP THE NEXT COUPLE OF DAYS OR SO. HE PUT YOU ON FLUIDS RIGHT AWAY, HE SAID YOU WERE SEVERELY DEHYDRATED.”

“…Russ?”

“OH! I BETTER TEXT HIM,” he says, gently squeezing your fingers in his. It brings a smile to your face. “SORRY… I HAVE TO LET GO TO GET MY PHONE OUT. HE WAS JUST OUT GETTING FOOD, I’LL TELL HIM TO BRING SOMETHING FOR YOU. IS THERE ANYTHING YOU’D LIKE IN PARTICULAR?”

“… Cheeseburger, only mustard.”

“MWEHEHEH, OF COURSE.”

He gently sets your hand down and pulls out his phone, his hard phalanges clicking away at the screen.

“… Nora?”

“OH, SHE’S FINE! SHE MISSES YOU A LOT AND HAS BEEN WAITING FOR YOU TO COME HOME SINCE YOU DISAPPEARED. PAPY AND I HAVE BEEN TAKING CARE OF HER. SHE HASN’T BEEN EATING WELL, THOUGH, BUT I’M SURE ONCE YOU’RE BACK SHE’LL BE BACK TO NORMAL!”

Tears well up in your eyes.

“OH NO! _____, YOU SHOULDN’T CRY! YOU’RE _DEHYDRATED_ , REMEMBER?”

You feel Sans dabbing your eyes with his kerchief.

“food’s here.”

Something cold and damp is shoved into your hand. It’s enough of a shock to get your eyes to snap open again.

“’s that orange drink from mcd’s. lotta water an’ sugar. drink up, ya dried out human raisin.”

“I need to… Sit… Up…”

You can barely grip the fountain drink as it is. Russ notices and holds onto it while Sans helps you sit up on the bed. It helps you wake up a bit more and now that you can see them both, you feel a bit better.

Russ hands you the drink and you start taking small sips. The cold beverage hitting the roof of your mouth is waking you up more and more.

You’re not quite all there enough to start hitting them with twenty questions about what happened while you were passed out, but they’re both happy to try and answer anything you might have asked anyways.

Because you had spent almost a week in the void and didn’t eat or drink anything while you were there, it all caught back up with you once you were brought back. Sans shoots a pointed glare at Russ, who just sips at his drink nonchalantly. So, several days without water or any fluids of any kind, and you passed right out. The doctors also said that you were starving, which you certainly start to feel, but they wanted to prioritize getting you hydrated again with saline before introducing food, as it could shock your system a bit.

Russ also volunteers that because you figured out how to use your ex-soulmate’s magic against him, you were basically the most powerful thing to exist in the universe when the human souls he was hoarding automatically transferred to you… For about five seconds, he says chuckling. Human souls can’t bind to human souls, so when you all got back from the void they just floated away to their final resting place.

You can’t lift your own cheeseburger to your mouth, but Sans is happy to tear off small pieces for you to mangle in your tired jaws. It feels good to have small bites of something, though, and you don’t finish half the burger before you refuse having any more.

“I’m… _Alive_ ,” you mumble out at one point. “… How?”

Sans looks at Russ, who shrugs. “I CREATED A NEW SOULBOND WITH YOU, AFTER YOU GAVE YOUR CONSENT. I KNOW IT’S NOT IDEAL, BUT… IT STABILIZED YOUR SOUL AND KEPT YOU FROM FALLING DOWN.”

“we weren’t expectin’ that he’d ‘ve soulbonded t’ you,” Russ explains. “that was about as worst case scenario we coulda got.”

You reach for Sans and he puts his hand into yours, holding your fingers in his hard, warm phalanges. You smile weakly at that.

“Think I’m gunna pass out again…”

“ALRIGHT, YOU DESERVE SOME REST. WE’LL BE HOME SOON.”

* * *

Once you start being able to get some more food down consistently and start having conscious episodes lasting longer than a few minutes, the hospital releases you and Sans and Russ charter a cab to take the three of you home. You figure Russ just wants to avoid taking you through the void again for the time being after what you’ve been through, so you don’t ask and just appreciate the gesture.

Nora absolutely _loses_ her tiny little mind when you walk in the door. She’s on a pile of blankets on the floor just inside the front door, a small bowl of water and a barely touched bowl of kibble right next to her. She sprints up and down the front entry way to the livingroom, chirping joyful little barks as she hops up and down from the couch where she expects you to come greet her. Russ manages to grapple her in his arms so he can hold her still while she sniffs you and licks your face, which helps her calm down a fair bit. Once she’s done vibrating, you manage to get her to eat a little of her food.

Sans makes you some cream of chicken soup from a can for dinner, since they haven’t been shopping in a week _and_ since you’ve only shown him how to cook a handful of things anyways. He gets your advice on seasoning it the way you like it, and cooks it in a pot on the stove instead of the microwave. It tastes like home.

After dinner he helps you upstairs to his room, where Nora joins you on the bed to rest at your feet, intent on not letting you out of her sight ever again. You lay down on Sans’ bed snuggled comfortably into his side, and he gently strokes your hair up and away from your face.

“… Can we talk?” you ask. “About… Some of the things I saw?”

His hand tenses in your hair, and he pulls away to sit up on the bed. You pull yourself to sit across from him.

“I… THOUGHT YOU MIGHT NOTICE,” he breathes shakily. “THAT I WASN’T, UM… _ALWAYS_ SANS.”

“Sans, you don’t _have_ to-“

“ _NO_ – YOU’RE MY SOULMATE, AND WE’RE SOULBONDED NOW. YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO KNOW.”

He takes a deep breath, untying the kerchief from his neck and looking at it forlornly.

“WHEN I WAS… ‘BORN’, I WAS FEMALE,” he explains. “GASTER GAVE ME A DIFFERENT NAME – _HANDWRITING_ – AND HE _INSISTED_ THAT I DRESS AND LOOK THE PART. IT NEVER FELT _RIGHT_ , THOUGH, AND NOT JUST BECAUSE I WAS SMALLER AND WEAKER THAN PAPYRUS, BUT…”

He folds the large indigo kerchief on his lap in a long triangle, then drapes it over his head and holds the ends together under his chin, like a bonnet.

“SKELETON TRADITIONS SAY THAT SKELETON GIRLS _HAVE_ TO WEAR SOMETHING OVER THEIR HEADS TO DISTINGUISH THEMSELVES FROM THE BOYS. THIS IS HOW I WAS FORCED TO LOOK, UNTIL I WAS ABOUT FOURTEEN AND TOLD PAPY THAT I DIDN’T _WANT_ TO, ANYMORE.”

You can tell how much this subject hurts him. He takes the kerchief off of his head and ties it back around his neck like before. “Sans, it’s _okay_ -“

“I’M _SORRY_ ,” he chokes out, wiping his cracked eye socket as watery tears start to form there. “I’M SORRY THAT I WASN’T WHO YOU THOUGHT I WAS.”

“Oh for the love of- _Come here_.”

You grab him by the kerchief and pull him down onto the bed below you, kissing him fervently. Once you’ve rendered him breathless, you take his hand in yours and fix him with a serious look.

“Sans, you’re a man and you’ve always _been_ a man. I don’t _care_ if you were called a different name before, you’re my _boyfriend_. _That’s_ what I see you as, and how I always will.”

He’s stunned, his cheekbones lighting up and tears welling in his eye sockets. “… REALLY?”

“ _Really_ ,” you grin. “And anyways, that’s not even what I was trying to _ask_ you about in the first place!”

“… OH?”

“What I _wanted_ to know was how come I got a big dose of _Russ’_ memories, too.”

“… _OHHH_ …”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SEVERAL CATS RELEASED FROM SEVERAL BAGS! Finally!
> 
> Never seen trans Sans done before so I decided to do it myself. I like this aspect of his character and hope I've done it justice - I've wanted to incorporate more LGBT+ characters into my fics for a long time besides just Undyne being lesbian (canon) or Frisk being non-binary (broadly accepted fanon). Anyways, besides this it shouldn't really come up again, because it shouldn't - Sans is a man full-stop, and nothing's going to take that away from him, least of all Reader.


	32. The Brother.

“… _UM_.”

Sans works his mouth uselessly as a guilty expression crosses his face.

“… IS THERE ANY CHANCE YOU COULD… _FORGET_ ALL THAT?” he adds, chuckling nervously.

“That I got Russ’ memories too?” you gawk. “Sans, what are you playing at?”

“I-IT’S NOT _ME!_ ” he protests, sitting up and grasping your hands in his. “ _PAPY_ SAID HE DIDN’T WANT YOU TO KNOW.”

“Know _what?_ ”

“THAT, UM…” he trails off.

“… That _he’s_ my soulmate, too?” you realize.

Gaster had called them _fake_ soulmates… Soulmates _plural_.

He lets out a long, shaky breath. “OKAY, SO… WHEN I ATTEMPTED TO SOULBOND WITH YOU IN THE VOID, IT WASN’T ENOUGH,” he explains. “AND… _I_ STARTED TO FADE AWAY TOO. SO, PAPY HAD TO DO _SOMETHING_ , AND IT TURNED OUT THAT BOTH OF US TOGETHER COULD MAKE A STRONG ENOUGH BOND TO KEEP YOU ALIVE.”

“… I’m soulbonded to Papyrus too,” you say.

It’s a difficult concept to grapple with, honestly.

“… Does that mean… He’s had _feelings_ for me this _whole time??_ ”

Sans bites his lip and pulls at his kerchief tied loosely around his neck. “I MEAN…”

“Why didn’t he ever _say_ anything??”

“WELL…” he struggles, then sighs. “… _YOU_ SAW ALL HIS MEMORIES, RIGHT?”

You sure did. All the fighting, the bursts of wild magic whenever his rage got out of control, the many, _many_ one-night stands…

And the _millions_ of times he’d stuck up for his little brother, whom Gaster would _torture_ just to get a rise out of him.

Sans’ ability, you know now, is a sort of advanced healing – in addition to being hardier and sturdier than most monsters, he was able to heal virtually any wound or damage quicker and without any evidence of damage, save for the large crack over his left eye the one time he loaned Papyrus his ability to save his life. That’s why his bones are clean of any scratches or damage, despite the _numerous_ fights he’d get into as a kid, either because another monster thought he was weak or because he wanted to assert himself as strong.

And Papyrus, having a secondary aspect of Bravery, wasn’t truly afraid of _anything_ – not even his own _death_. With one exception – Sans getting hurt.

It made Papyrus _crazy_ over-protective – he’d throw himself in the line of fire for his brother frequently, not even caring if his own life might be at risk. You’ve seen him do it over, and over, and _over_ again, throughout his memories. Sans is the only person in the _world_ he cares enough about to do that for.

“… He’d never do anything to hurt you,” you figure out. “And… He probably thought that it’d be better for _you_ , if he stayed out of our way.”

 _That’s_ why he’s been avoiding you from the start! All the long hours, not coming home until late at night, ditching you both in the middle of breakfast to go to work with half of his food still on his plate…

“HE’D SACRIFICE HIS HAPPINESS IN AN _INSTANT_ IF HE THOUGHT MINE WAS AT RISK,” Sans admits. “… I’M VERY LUCKY TO HAVE HIM AS MY OLDER BROTHER, BUT…”

You collapse on the bed, hands over your face as you process all this. “How could he _do_ all that to himself?”

“HONESTLY, I KNEW FROM THE START THAT YOU WERE HIS SOULMATE.”

Your hands fall away as you gawk at him. “ _What?!_ ”

Sans grins. “HE WAS STARING AT THE BACK OF YOUR HEAD ON THAT BUS FOR MOST OF THE TRIP, AN IRRITATED EXPRESSION ON HIS FACE, UNTIL HE FELL ASLEEP,” he reveals. “THAT’S PART OF WHY I WANTED TO TAKE YOU IN, WHY I ASKED HIM TO FIND YOU, WHY I THOUGHT WE SHOULD LIVE TOGETHER…”

You leaf through his memories, back to how he felt after the announcement at the embassy. “You were partly angry at Russ for pinning the soulmate thing on _you_ and you _alone_ ,” you gape. “ _And_ he said that you’d _both_ be dust if Toriel killed me, but he brushed it off like _he_ couldn’t live without _you!_ ”

You cover your face again and roll away, groaning. “Oh my _gods_ why am I just realizing all of this _now!_ ”

Then you roll back and stick a finger right in his face. “ _That’s_ why you sent me shopping with him. That was a _date_ ,” you accuse.

Sans’ grin is positively shit-eating.

“YOU DO FEEL _SOMETHING_ FOR HIM THOUGH, RIGHT?”

“I mean he’s _literally_ the tall, dark, and handsome _stereotype_ , of _course_ I do!” you complain.

Sans snickers, fully enjoying your ire.

“Why are you pinning me with all of this _now?_ ” you sit up, leaning back on your hands. “Why didn’t _you_ say anything sooner if you knew all along?”

He huffs. “I WAS HOPING THAT YOU WOULD FIGURE IT OUT ON YOUR OWN, BUT PAPY MADE THAT A _LOT_ HARDER WHEN HE STARTED AVOIDING US.”

“… Why aren’t you _jealous_ , or something?”

“… I DON’T KNOW?” he says, rubbing at his cervical vertebrae as he thinks it over. “I MEAN… I LEARNED PRETTY EARLY ON THAT WE’RE BOTH YOUR SOULMATE SOMEHOW, SO I GUESS… I’M OKAY WITH IT?”

“… _Whaaat._ ”

“I’M STILL VERY NEW TO THE WHOLE DATING THING,” he reminds you. “BUT I GUESS… I DON’T _MIND?_ IF YOU DATED MY BROTHER TOO?? YOU MAKE ME REALLY HAPPY, AND… I _KNOW_ YOU COULD MAKE _HIM_ REALLY HAPPY, TOO.”

“… This is _not_ the direction I thought this conversation was going,” you say, dumbfounded. “This is not the direction I thought _any_ of this would be going in, _ever_ , in all my life.”

“… YOU SHOULD AT LEAST TRY TO TALK TO HIM ABOUT IT,” Sans determines. “YOU MAKE ME REALLY HAPPY, AND I WANT TO KEEP DATING YOU AND DOING THINGS WITH YOU, BUT… IT _HURTS_ TO SEE MY BROTHER CONSTANTLY BEATING HIMSELF UP OVER THIS.”

It hurts you too, now that you’re fully aware of it. You let yourself drop down on the bed and bounce against the mattress.

“Is there… I feel like _such_ a selfish shit for asking this, but… Is it _possible_ to have it both ways? Date you _and_ Russ at the same time?” you fumble out. “Gods, I feel so _guilty_ already just _having_ that thought-!”

“ _DON’T!_ ” he says, holding your face and looking down at you with concern. “I MEAN, SINCE YOU’RE BOTH MINE _AND_ HIS SOULMATE, WOULDN’T THAT ONLY BE _NATURAL?_ ”

“I don’t know, I’ve never done that before,” you admit. “ _Especially_ not with two brothers. It feels like _cheating_. Plus I don’t have feelings for Russ like I do for you.”

He smiles. “BUT WE’VE SPENT A LOT OF TIME TOGETHER DEVELOPING THOSE FEELINGS.”

“… True.”

“SO… MAYBE YOU SHOULD SPEND SOME MORE TIME WITH PAPYRUS TO DEVELOP FEELINGS FOR HIM, TOO?” he suggests.

“… I _guess_ that makes sense.”

“ _BUT_ ,” he adds, grinning deviously as he sits back, crossing his legs and gripping his ankles in front of him. “IF THERE’S _ONE_ THING I WANT TO DO WITH YOU FIRST BEFORE _HE_ GETS TO, IT’S SEX.”

Your face heats up. “Oh my _gods! Sans!_ ”

“I MEAN, HE HAS A _LOT_ OF EXPERIENCE, I GUESS… I JUST DON’T WANT TO PALE IN COMPARISON,” he giggles, cheekbones flushing brightly.

“I literally _just_ got home from the hospital after dusting my own soulmate and getting two new ones out of the deal. Sans, you’re _great_ , but I am _so_ _far_ from in the _mood_ for that right now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sans ships you with his brother, but he also still wants you for himself. Wat do??


	33. The Martyr.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Russ gets his feelings out :D He kisses you without asking first, just a heads up.

You get up late the next day, discovering that Sans has already taken Nora outside for her business and left a bottle of water and a note on the nightstand for you. He’s put together some sandwiches for you to grab and eat out of the fridge and plans to bring home dinner at around six.

As you head downstairs for your routine to sit in front of the TV all day with Nora on your lap, Russ comes in the front door with a bunch of bagged groceries and a case of sports drinks.

You head over to him. “Russ?”

He tears open the package and shoves one of the bottles in your direction, not even turning his head to look at you. “drink,” he orders.

You take the bottle from him and cradle it against your chest.

“i wanna see ya drink two o’ three o’ these per day,” he says, picking up the case and bringing them over to the kitchen. He opens the fridge and starts stocking it with them, along with some other groceries. “there’s plenty o’ food for ya to try an’ get yer appetite back in ‘ere, too.”

You remember seeing the kitchen being destroyed in their memories, what happened with Russ’ magic when his anger got out of control. He’d gone out and bought all new appliances right away to replace the ones that were shredded, but all of the kitchen cabinets and countertops were still being rebuilt.

“… Russ, can we talk about something?”

“got nothin’ to talk about,” he dismisses readily.

 _That_ pisses you off a bit. He finishes what he’s doing and brushes past you, putting his boots back on.

“Russ, you don’t have work today,” you protest.

“there’s always work.”

“Sans gave you the day off!”

“then ‘m goin’ out.”

“Russ!”

You grab his arm but he shakes you off. He goes to open the door and you shove it closed, putting yourself bodily in his way. He immediately focuses his head away, taking a strained breath.

“Do I have to… Go back to the pajama store and buy that white lingerie thing you like and wear it in front of you before you’ll look at me again!?”

He turns his head back, but focuses at a spot above you. His cheekbones flare up an orange-red, and he immediately puts a hand over his face to conceal it, pressing his thumb and index phalanges against the outside corners of his eye sockets. He takes a long, calming breath before the blush fades and he can speak again.

“… what do you want.”

“Why didn’t you tell me that you’re my soulmate too?”

He clenches his teeth. “’cause there wasn’ nothin’ to tell. i’m not.”

“Then how did we get soulbonded?”

“we’re _not_.”

Is he just going to stand there and deny it?! “I saw your memories!”

“i’m in a lot o’ sans’ memories.”

“I saw ones where he wasn’t even _there!_ ”

“then you’re seein’ things.”

“Stop denying it, Russ!”

“there ain’t nothin’ to deny.”

“ _Russ!_ ” You grab his jacket.

“ ** _stop it._** ”

He _slams_ his hand into the door above you so hard you jump, claws digging into the wood. You flinch as the dust and chips of it fall over your shoulder. He takes a deep, _staggering_ breath.

“jus’… **let it _go_** , darlin’.”

It takes a second, but you swallow and find your voice again. “… What, and just leave you to be miserable _forever?_ ”

“’s better that way.”

“I disagree.”

He scoffs, removing his hand from the door, sliding it back in his pocket and shrugging. “don’ care if ya do or don’t, ‘s the way it’s gotta be.”

He turns away from you, heading for the back patio door as he digs his smokes out of a pocket. You follow him hot on his heels, setting the drink down on the way.

“leave m’ be,” he dismisses you.

“We should at least _talk_ about this-“

“there’s **_nothin’_** to **_talk_ about**.”

He _slams_ the patio door open and you’re briefly grateful that the glass doesn’t shatter under his strength. Undeterred, you follow him out and slide it shut before Nora can come out with you.

… His hands are _shaking_. He can’t quite get the lighter to work so he can light one of his smokes. He groans in frustration as he keeps trying, looking about halfway ready to _snap_.

You put your hand gently over his, holding his fingers to steady him and feel him jerk in surprise. He looks down at you with the lines of a scowl etched into his hard face, but… He stops trembling, _just_ for a second.

“… you don’ _fuckin’_ **get it** , _do_ _you?_ ”

He tosses away the pack of smokes and rounds on you, throwing off your hand and taking heavy steps towards you.

“if you _really_ saw my memories,” he spits. “then you’d know i’m a man of _restraint_. problem is, ‘m _really_ not very **_good_** _at it!_ ”

“I _know_ that, but-!”

“so _what_ d’ you think’s gunna _happen_ if **_i_** got to **_touch you?_** ”

Your back hits the brick wall and he places both of his hands against it on either side of you, balled up into fists. His arms are trembling as he glares you down.

“i **_saw_** what gaster **_did_** _to you,_ ” he growls. “how he _treated_ you. y’ think i’d **_really_** be any better than **_that?_** ” 

“Russ… You _can’t_ _hurt_ me like he did,” you claim, holding a hand over your soul.

“… the hell makes you think _that?_ ”

“Because I **_know_** _you!_ ” you snap back. “I know you’d never hurt _anyone_ you cared about, but you’re only hurting _yourself_ and this _martyr_ bullshit has got to _stop!_ ”

“i _use_ girls ‘n throw ‘em _away_ , you think i _really_ give two shits about you?”

“It wasn’t about _using_ them, it was about _release!_ And I’ve _seen_ the way you look at me _through your own eyes!_ ”

He’s momentarily stunned by that, knowing he can’t deny it.

You throw your arms around him in a hug, squeezing him tightly. “Just _stop **hurting** yourself_ for mine or Sans’ sakes, okay? I don’t _know_ where this leaves us, but the _first_ thing we’ve got to do about it is to just get it out in the open and _talk_ about it.”

Very slowly, the rigidity in his posture lessens, and he takes his hands off the wall, wrapping his arms around you too.

Then he backs you into the wall, pressing his body roughly against yours as he sucks in a sharp breath, his hands coming up to hold your face.

“Russ-“

He kisses you. It’s _hungry_ and passionate like you’ve _never_ felt before. It’s nothing like Sans, who’s still fairly innocent and timid in his affections, nor like Gaster, who felt like he wanted to dominate you, _own_ you, as if you should belong to him no questions asked.

No, this is something else entirely – this feels like something he’s been waiting to do for _ages_ , like he’s been drowning for so long and this is him finally coming up for air. He relaxes into it the more it goes on, like a weight is being lifted off of him as the moment grows longer, as the _insatiable_ _craving_ he’s been having loses its urgency.

He grunts as he jerks his hips into you, obviously craving something _more_ , but then he suddenly reels back and pulls away, skull flushed and cursing at himself.

“fuckin’ _hell_ ,” he spits, hunched over and running his hands over his face as he collects himself. “ _god_ , i’m **_so_** _fucking sorry_ , _____- see, _this_ ‘s why i gotta keep my fuckin’ _distance_ , else i’m jus’ gunna-“

“ _Russ!_ ”

He flinches at your tone, eye lights flicking back over to you.

“I didn’t say _stop_.”

And then you grab him and start kissing him back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ... Okay, I _might_ need to do some smut of these three in a oneshot sometime soon. I'll link it in the comments of the next chapter whenever it happens.


	34. The Kiss.

You’d managed to coax him over to the couch where you’re straddling his lap, his hands resting comfortably on your hips, where his thumbs are hooked through the belt loops of your new shorts. He feels so much more relaxed and at ease now that you’ve managed to clear the air about a few things.

“ _really_ feels like we shouldn’ be doin this,” he says, breaking off the kiss.

“Sans is apparently okay with it,” you remind him, giving his a peck at the corner of his mouth. “The _only_ condition he had was that _he_ wanted to have sex with me first.”

“makes perfect sense,” he chuckles. “can’t upstage m’ brother before he’s had his first time.”

“Oh, _gods_ ,” you laugh.

“but i _am_ gunna have ta dunk all yer exes int’ th’ void, though,” he grins. “jus’ as a side note.”

“Pfft, don’t you _dare!_ ”

Russ unhooks his thumbs from your shorts, moving his hands to rest at either side of your neck where it meets your shoulders. And he just… _Looks_ at you.

You can feel the light happy buzzing down in your soul, how _he’s_ feeling… How there’s so much he can just never bring himself to say out _loud_ , whether it might be a possible betrayal to his brother, or whether he’s worried that just saying it out loud might make it _too real_ , and he’s still not sure that he’s even _worthy_ of it.

He _adores_ you, though. Has for a long while.

Then his eye sockets widen in shock and he _throws_ you off his lap, then disappears into thin fucking _air_. You yelp as you bounce against the couch, hearing the key turn in the front door as it opens.

 _Oh crap, Sans_ is home!

You quickly comb your fingers through your hair, hoping it’s not too messy, then clamber off the couch to go help him with the stuff he’s carrying in.

“Hey honey!” you call out, breathless.

“HEY!” he greets you with a big smile. “SORRY I’M A BIT EARLY! I WANTED TO SEE YOU AND I HAD A FEELING THAT PIZZA MIGHT BE AMENABLE TO YOUR STOMACH…” His smile drops. “WHAT’S WRONG?”

 _Right_ , he can feel what you’re feeling through the soulbond. There’s obviously no point in _hiding_ this from him, right? I mean he _kind_ of inspired this.

“Okay, full disclosure: I talked to Russ, and we worked it out, sorta, and then ended up… Kissing…” you guiltily admit.

He blinks his sockets at you, stunned, then bursts out laughing.

“Wh-What’s so funny!?”

“YOU DID?? THAT’S _AWESOME!_ ” he says. “BETTER THAN I EXPECTED, REALLY!”

“… Well, _okay_ , you’re not mad. That’s… _Something_.”

He sets the boxes of pizza down on the stand by the door. “WHY WOULD I BE MAD? I TOLD YOU I’M OKAY WITH IT!”

He opens his arms for a hug from you, and you jerk weirdly as you go to accept it. When you draw away he holds your face in his hands, blushing.

“UM… IS HE A BETTER KISSER THAN ME, THOUGH?” he asks, glancing shyly to one side.

“Oh gods, I am _so_ not comparing the two,” you fret. “You’re very different but both in _very_ good ways.”

He snickers and plants one on your mouth, and you ease into it. This _also_ feels right, but a different _kind_ of right.

“THAT WAS ACTUALLY A TEST,” he teases you, poking your nose. “BUT YOU PASSED!”

“… _What?_ ”

“NO _COMPARING_ ,” he asserts, letting you go and turning to grab the pizza again. “IF THIS IS GOING TO WORK THEN THERE CAN’T BE ANY SORT OF COMPETITION INVOLVED IN IT. WE’RE BOTH YOUR SOULMATE _EQUALLY_ , AND IF YOU _EVER_ SAY ANYTHING THAT COMPARES US, PAPYRUS WILL JUST SURRENDER YOU TO ME AGAIN AND BE MISERABLE ABOUT IT FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE.”

“… That’s some _galaxy_ brain-level shit right there,” you admit.

“PIZZA?”

“ _Heck_ yes I’m _starving_.”

He brings it over to the framed in countertops where some wood has been left sitting over them, setting the boxes down and grabbing some plates.

“Oh, uh,” you hesitate. “We were sitting on the couch together just before you got in,” you tell him. “But… He fucked off through the void just before you opened the door.”

“WHERE IS HE NOW?” Sans asks. “YOU MUST BE ABLE TO FEEL HIM THROUGH THE BOND.”

You think about it. “… Upstairs in his room I think. He feels ashamed, and… Scared that he’s hurt you.”

He sighs, smiling. “I’LL GO TALK TO HIM,” he says, heading upstairs.

You plate yourself up a couple slices of pizza and take one of the sports drinks from the fridge, deciding to head over to the couch with Nora hot on your heels the whole way.

You flinch as you hear Sans yelling upstairs, their emotions both roiling in your soul as there’s some kind of conflict between them. But then it goes quiet just as quickly, and then there’s a long period of silence. You finish one and a half slices of your pizza before you feel stuffed, drowning it in sports drink and surrendering a slice of pepperoni to your insistent pup.

Just as you start thinking that maybe you should go check on them, they finally come downstairs, Sans beaming and Russ looking well and truly scolded.

“… royal strategist all right,” Russ bemoans.

“AND DON’T YOU FORGET IT!”

“What the hell _happened_ between you guys?” you ask, concerned.

“jus’ got called out on all m’ bullshit, ‘s all,” he admits, flopping onto the other couch and becoming one with it. “nothin’ too unusual.”

“He really had us from the start, didn’t he?” you chuckle.

“how’d i not even see it comin’?”

“AREN’T YOU GOING TO GET SOME PIZZA, PAPY?” Sans calls after him from the kitchen.

“oh, right,” he realizes, rising from the couch to stand.

“AND THEN SIT ON THE _OTHER_ COUCH WITH _____ AND ME WHEN YOU GET BACK,” he adds.

Russ hangs his head, and you chuckle at his chastised expression.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I also spend a fair bit of the next chapter justifying the poly ship, fair warning. I'm probably overdoing it but I feel like these characters would genuinely struggle, so I'm just trying to cover off all my bases.


	35. The Cuddle.

Sans explained more of his reasoning for the poly situation you find yourself in over the early dinner he’d brought home. He’d actually been reading some stuff online about love languages and different relationship types and determined on his own that he’s actually _not_ as touchy-feely as you are, preferring to treat you with gifts and acts of service and with spending quality time together. Russ on the other hand was very big on physical touch, words of affirmation, and quality time as well, making you feel all the more spoiled. You feel a little let down to learn that Sans _hasn’t_ been enjoying cuddling with you as much as you have with him, but while he’s still down for it and enjoys your nightly ritual of going to his bed to kiss and talk, Russ is a _much_ more eager cuddle partner.

He also explained that it wasn’t logical or fair to put you in a position where you had to choose. Nor did he like watching his brother be miserable trying to _force_ that choice upon you. Russ tried to complain but Sans shut him down pretty quickly, and said that he fully supported this arrangement and wanted to ensure that his brother was happy, too.

He basically left no room for argument, and in the end it _did_ make a lot of sense given the soulmates/soulbonding situation, even though both you and Russ still have your misgivings about it – you’ve only had monogamous relationships before this, and Russ hasn’t ever had a _real_ relationship at all before now. But it helped you both feel more comfortable with Sans being so ferociously supportive of it.

It even gave Russ the confidence to put his arm around your shoulders and kiss your collarbone while Sans was right there looking at you. That more than anything explained to you gave you the reassurance that this is worth it’s fair shot.

The three of you leaned into one another on the couch as you picked out a movie to spend the rest of the evening watching together on Netflix. You don’t remember the end of it as Nora also joined the cuddle pile by curling up onto your lap and falling asleep, and you shortly following her lead.

* * *

You wake up on your bed, alone, save for Nora curled up into your side. It’s dark and there’s a chill in the air as you’ve apparently kicked your blankets off of you, still wearing your shorts and tank from earlier. Your bra has been taken off though, and you smile as you wonder which of the boys took the initiative to do that.

Your loyal dog wakes up and follows you as you head downstairs for a sports drink from the fridge, remembering that you’ve only had the one today. You grab half a sandwich and a couple slices of cheese to nibble on, as well, taking everything back up to your room to munch on as you sit in the dark, catching up with your social feeds on your phone.

Once you’re done all that, and get changed into some comfier sleeping clothes, you realize that you’re still wide awake. One thought keeps plaguing you over and over again, and it bothers you intensely that you can’t find a way to resolve it on your own.

So, you head back out into the hallway and look out at the other doors in front of you. Sans was wrong about at least _one_ thing – you _are_ going to have to choose between the two of them here and there.

Sans makes you feel safe and protected, he listens to you and eases your fears, caressing your face and wiping away your tears. It’s a much more gentle and reserved affection, but you’re not sure that’s what you really need right now.

You need to be _held_ , to be reassured in a different way. Plus Russ might actually have some sort of answer to your question.

You tap quietly on his door, and hear a sleepy grunt on the other side. You wait a few seconds, and just as you’re debating whether to knock again or give up and go to Sans instead, the door swings open.

“… _oh_.”

He stole the word right out of your mouth. He’s wearing those pajama pants that make him look so cozy and incredibly _hot_.

“Sorry, I just… Can I come in?” you ask.

He scratches at his cervical vertebrae, glancing behind him at the state of his room. “’s kinda a _mess_ in here,” he hesitates. “what’s up?”

“I can’t get back to sleep,” you admit, even as you yawn weakly. “Also I… Keep thinking about what happened, back in the void.”

“ _shit_ ,” he breathes. “… yeah, okay. y’ can come in. watch yer step though.”

You follow him into the darkened room. There are worn clothes on the floor everywhere and it’s completely surrounded with bookshelves where random odds and ends are piled and disorganized, least of all books. Sans’ room by comparison has always been very _exacting_ in its organization – it’s pristine, everything has its place – but you can tell that Russ doesn’t quite give the same care and attention to where his things end up, just so long as he remembers where he left them last.

You’re somewhere in the middle, admittedly – clothes on the floor, but at least everything else _sort of_ has its place.

You head to sit on the bed and he holds your shoulder to stop you. “.. i should change th’ sheets first. give me a sec.”

“… But Russ, you were just sleeping on them weren’t you? I’m sure it’s fine.”

“…. no, i gotta,” he sheepishly insists. “won’t take long.”

One set of fresh sheets later, he lays down on the bed and you curl up in his arms.

“what’s botherin’ you, darlin’?” he asks.

“… Why was _Gaster_ my soulmate?”

“ _fuck_ …” he swears. “tha’s a _big_ question.”

“I just don’t _get_ _it_ ,” you confess, feeling the sting of tears beginning to swell up behind your eyes. “Why _him?_ _Why_ would my soulmate be someone so…”

He curls himself around you protectively, holding you tightly over your back and carding his hand through your hair. “i don’ know, ‘m sorry. i wish i had an answer for ya that made any sense.”

“… Am I a really bad person? Am I just in denial about it or something?” you fret. “I… I _did_ _kill_ him… I didn’t even think about it!”

“trust me,” he drawls. “y’ did the whole damn _universe_ a favour when y’ did.”

He continues holding you and petting your hair, shushing you and reassuring you for minutes on end. You feel yourself start to relax as he comforts you, and you realize that you were right – this is _exactly_ what you needed right now; to be wrapped up in somebody’s arms and be quietly reassured.

“… matter o’ fact,” Russ rumbles out quietly, a chuckle behind his voice. “you were prob’ly the _only_ person alive who _could’ve_ stopped him.”

“… What do you mean?”

He unwraps himself from you so he can look you in the eyes, holding your cheek. “’e was th’ most powerful douchebag in th’ entire world, ‘cause of th’ souls ‘e stole,” Russ explains. “an’ he _wasn’t_ the kinda guy to share power easily… _except_ when it came to ‘is _soulmate_ , apparently.”

“So, _what_ , I was _supposed_ to be his soulmate just so that I’d use it _against_ him?”

“… th’ void was a _temporary_ solution, i figure,” Russ continues explaining. “never meant t’ _leave_ ‘im there, an’ if ‘e was able to snatch ya durin’ the space of a _shortcut_ , then ‘e might’ve done the same t’ me or sans in time, an’ got ‘imself out. _pretty_ _sure_ ‘e was figurin’ a way around the whole ‘time catches up to ya’ thing, too. he was powerful enough t’ maybe trick th’ universe inta thinkin’ he’d never even _left_.”

“… But if I had never _met_ you guys, he wouldn’t have been able to snatch me in the first place,” you point out.

“then you’d ‘ve never met us,” Russ smirks. “an’ _tha’_ would’ve been a _damn shame_.”

That makes you smile, a little bit. He brushes some hair from your face.

“… the alternative t’ you doin’ what ya did would’ve been some monster gettin’ seven _more_ human souls an’ fightin’ ‘im head on. but, ‘m sure sans ‘n the queen don’ want a repeat o’ _that_. we’re _wildly_ _outnumbered_ by you fleshbags now, i’s jus’ _not_ gunna work in our favour.”

You snicker a bit at that.

“roll over, darlin’. ‘m gunna spoon ya ‘til yer good an’ asleep.”

You happily comply, and he wraps his arms around you comfortably, pulling the thin bedsheet up over you both. You take a moment to readjust yourself for sleep and nestle further into him, letting out a soft, happy sigh.

“… y’ _might_ _not_ wanna rub against m’ _junk_ like that,” Russ grunts behind you. “else we might have t’ break sans’ ‘no sex’ rule.”

“ _Oh geez_ ,” you blush furiously into your hand as he chuckles. “ _Night_ , Russ.”

“night angel.”


	36. The Breakfast.

“see? nora’s even keepin’ us honest.”

You wake up to Sans leaning in Russ’ doorway, already dressed in his armour for today, a mixed expression on his face. He’s… Glad to see the two of you comfortable together? But there’s also maybe just a hint of suspicion over the _why_.

You turn and see that Nora joined you at some point when you left the door open, and curled up on top of the blankets between your butt and Russ’ crotch. As Russ moves to sit she’s jostled enough to get up and stretch, yawning adorably.

As you sit up, Sans can see that you’re wearing a pajama shirt and comfy pants, and the rigidity in his posture melts away a little.

“We didn’t do anything,” you deflect. “I just… I couldn’t sleep and I had something to ask Russ.”

“she wanted t’ know why gaster was ‘er soulmate,” Russ supplies.

“… _OH_.” Sans is surprised. “I HADN’T GIVEN THAT MUCH THOUGHT, ACTUALLY. WHAT DID YOU COME UP WITH?”

“tha’ she’s a fierce warrior o’ _destiny_ an’ ‘er divine mission was t’ _dust_ that bastard from th’ start.”

You punch Russ’ shoulder playfully and he chuckles.

“… THERE _WERE_ A LOT OF THINGS THAT FELT _OFF_ ABOUT THE SITUATION,” Sans admits. “ANYWAYS, BOTH OF YOU SHOULD GET DRESSED AND COME DOWNSTAIRS FOR BREAKFAST. WE HAVE TO DISCUSS SECURITY FOR THE PRESS CONFERENCE COMING UP IN A FEW DAYS.”

… Is _that_ why he’s a bit stiff this morning? Yeah, he’s probably just preoccupied with making sure this thing goes off without a hitch.

Russ gives a lazy salute from where he’s sat on the bed. “yessir, we’ll be right down.”

Sans nods and leaves. You look down at what you’re wearing.

“… What did he mean by ‘get dressed’? I’m good the way I am right now,” you playfully note.

He shrugs. “beats me.”

* * *

You throw on a different shirt and a bra but keep your purple llama pajama bottoms on out of comfort and just a little rebelliousness this morning. Russ did kick you out to get fully dressed though, and shows up downstairs in a loose grey muscle shirt and tight ripped up jeans.

Sans has made breakfast and it’s honestly _delicious_ – he’s clearly been paying attention to your spurts of cooking lessons. Chocolate chip pancakes from scratch with bacon, as well as scrambled eggs and toast for diversity. You suck down another one of the sports drinks with it as they help you to feel hungrier so you can clear your plate, where you’ve basically taken a little bit of everything. Your appetite is coming back by degrees, but you feel like you’re just about back to normal.

“ALRIGHT,” Sans begins over breakfast. “WE SHOULD TALK ASSIGNMENTS.”

“straight to work this mornin’, eh? y’ must be real worried ‘bout this thing,” Russ comments.

“WELL, WE STILL DON’T KNOW THE IDENTITY OF THE HUMAN GROUP THAT HAS BEEN LEAVING DANGEROUS PACKAGES AT THE EMBASSY AND TESTING OUR DEFENSES,” he points out. “WE’VE BOOKED A SEPARATE LOCATION FOR THE PRESS CONFERENCE, WHICH IS INCONVENIENT FOR MANY REASONS BUT IT WILL MEAN A SECURITY PLAN FOR THE EVENT.”

“Is _that_ what you’ve been working on when you’re out all day?” you ask.

Sans nods. “WE’VE MANAGED TO SECURE THE LOCAL THEATRE AS A VENUE – NOT CONVENTIONAL FOR A CONFERENCE I AM TOLD, AND IT _DOES_ HAVE IT’S DRAWBACKS, BUT I HAVE BEEN WORKING OUT A PLAN FOR IT.”

He takes a rolled up sheet of paper and unfurls it, spreading it out on the coffee table.

“THE QUEEN WILL BE CENTRE-STAGE – I HAVE ARRANGED FOR A PODIUM WITH A MICROPHONE TO BE BROUGHT OUT. ALPHYS AND I WILL STAND TO HER BACK RIGHT, WITH THE MIDDLE CURTAINS DRAWN BEHIND US. ALPHYS IS THERE REPRESENTING THE ROYAL GUARD, AND I WILL BE INTRODUCED AS ONE OF HER ADVISORS.”

“fuck, _alphys_ ‘s gunna be there?” Russ groans.

“Wait, you’re _not_ being introduced as the Royal Strategist?” you have to ask.

He shakes his head. “SHE WILL BE DOWNPLAYING MANY OF OUR ROLES AS WE’RE INTRODUCED SO AS NOT TO TIP OUR HAND TO ENEMY INTELLIGENCE BY HANDING A LIST OF IMPORTANT TARGETS TO THEM. ALPHYS WILL BE INTRODUCED GENUINELY BECAUSE SHE IS ONLY IN TOWN FOR THE EVENT – SHE WILL THEN RETURN TO UNDERGROUND TO ATTEND TO HER RESPONSIBILITIES THERE, HOPEFULLY AWAY FROM HARM.”

“Okay, admittedly that’s pretty smart.”

“THAT SAID, BOTH YOU AND PAPYRUS WILL NOT BE PRESENT AT THE CONFERENCE… _VISIBLY_ ,” he says, a grin playing at the corners of his mouth. “PAPYRUS, YOU AND _____ WILL BE ON OVERSIGHT.”

“And that means…?”

“means ‘e booked us a theatre so we can hide out in th’ rafters,” he grins.

“UNDYNE WILL BE WORKING CAMERAS – THIS IS SHORT NOTICE SO I HAD HER HANDLE IT,” he says, giving you an apologetic look.

“It’s fine. Technically I didn’t even _exist_ for near a week, so it makes sense you’d give her that job,” you shrug. “I’ll touch base with her and see if she needs help, though.”

“I’M SURE SHE WOULD APPRECIATE IT,” Sans smiles. “SHE IS TAKING THE PROJECTION BOOTH AS HER CENTRAL CAMERA CONTROL AND WILL BE KEEPING HER EYES ON THE FEEDS. SHE WILL ALSO HAVE A RADIO WITH HER. PAPYRUS, YOU WILL HAVE A RADIO TOO, JUST IN CASE UNDYNE SPOTS ANY SUSPICIOUS ACTIVITY BEFORE YOU DO.”

“an’ what do we do if we spot suspicious folks?” Russ rightfully asks.

Sans lets out a sigh. “… WE ARE TO BE _DISCRETE_ ABOUT IT, AND TO AVOID USING MAGIC _EXCEPT_ AS A _LAST RESORT_.”

“… _sans_ …”

You feel the room get colder. “Um… So, _that’s_ a _big deal_ , I take it?”

Sans holds the bridge of his nasal passage for a moment, composing himself. “… THINGS WERE _VERY_ DIFFERENT IN THE UNDERGROUND, AS YOU’VE SEEN FROM OUR MEMORIES,” he begins. “IF SOMEONE ATTACKED US, IT WAS COMPLETELY ABOVE-BOARD TO _STRIKE BACK_. HAVING TO PLAY PASSIVE GOES _AGAINST_ OUR INSTINCTS, OUR CULTURE, EVERYTHING WE’VE LEARNED.”

“this press conference mus’ be pretty damn important t’ leave ourselves _defenseless_ like that,” Russ says.

“THE QUEEN WANTS _NO_ VIOLENT CONFLICT IF AT ALL POSSIBLE. SHE IS TRYING TO PRESERVE AND PROTECT OUR PEOPLE BY FORGING NEW ALLIES – LASHING OUT WOULD DO IRREPARABLE HARM TO THAT OBJECTIVE.”

“But…” you interject. “You guys are both pretty strong, right? Would you even need magic to defend yourselves?”

“ _strength_ won’t stop a _bullet_ ,” Russ answers darkly. “th’ main reason i’m as _fast_ as i am is ‘cause o’ my shortcuts.”

“… BUT _BARRIERS_ MAY BE ACCEPTABLE.”

Sans has a twinkle in his eye lights as he mulls it over, pressing his chin into a gloved hand.

You sigh. “Sans, I _seriously_ doubt _I’d_ be fast enough to stop a bullet _either_ -“

Russ picks up what he’s putting down. “… but _sans_ or _i_ might.”

“THROUGH A SOULBOND, WE SHARE MAGIC – THAT’S HOW YOU WERE ABLE TO DEFEAT GASTER, RIGHT?” Sans continues the thread of thought. “_____, IF YOU CAN TEACH US HOW TO USE YOUR BARRIER MAGIC, THEN WE MAY BE ABLE TO USE IT IN CASE OF EMERGENCY TO STOP AN ATTACK.”

“… yer not thinkin’ of _exposin’_ _____ t’ humans an’ monsters, are ya?” Russ challenges.

… What does he mean about exposing you to _monsters?_

“NO, OF _COURSE_ NOT – I WANT TO KEEP YOU OUT OF HARM’S WAY AS _MUCH_ AS POSSIBLE,” he says, a sympathetic look crossing his face. “ANY MAGIC WOULD _STILL_ BE A LAST RESORT, BUT YOUR BARRIERS HAVE A FAR LESS THREATENING APPEARANCE TO THEM THAN BONE ATTACKS OR PAPY’S TENDENCY TO DISAPPEAR AND REAPPEAR AT WILL. BARRIERS HOWEVER CAN BE PURELY DEFENSIVE, SO WE SHOULD CONSIDER THEIR USE.”

“but what ‘bout th’ queen? alphys? undyne? ain’t _nobody_ knows ‘bout th’ three of us bein’ soulbonded.”

You get the impression it might somehow be dangerous for you if they did.

“THEN IT IS A GOOD THING _____ WILL BE PRESENT AT THE EVENT SO WE CAN BLAME IT ALL ON HER,” he smirks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, mastermind Sans at his finest. More to come.


	37. The Captain.

You’re _really_ not sure how to begin teaching barrier magic to Sans and Russ.

You’re trying, but it turns out that when they just pull magic out of their soul and manifest it, they get bone attacks instead of barriers. It’s not instinctual for them like it is for you.

But the three of you try your best at it nonetheless – at home in secret, of course. You dig up the old psychic articles that led you to learning how to create them in the first place, and try to remember what it felt like to use Gaster’s magic against him, but that’s been fading away along with his memories. As much as you hated that bastard for taking advantage of you, you _almost_ wish you could just ring him up and ask him how the hell he managed to use _your_ magic in the first place.

Very, _very_ small almost. _Microscopic_ almost.

You also wonder whether it isn’t more difficult for them to pick it up because they are only _half_ -soulmates to begin with, because of how their souls were ‘made’ using some of Gaster’s magic, instead of being full soulmates.

Gods, it’s just so _frustrating_.

The two days of prep time you had fly by and you don’t feel the _least_ bit prepared. You head down to the theatre with the boys _very_ early in the morning to meet up with Alphys, Undyne, and the Queen and to do your last minute prep work before the whole thing kicks off.

There are a _lot_ of human staff at the venue who try to make themselves useful by running through areas you’re trying to secure with offers of help. You and Russ have to constantly send them away and make sure they don’t go anywhere you haven’t sweeped yet. Eventually you get sick of them and have them all set up a security checkpoint with a pair of metal detectors and instructions to search bags for weapons. This _is_ a government function, after all.

Undyne comes in a bit later with a big box of doughnuts and two trays of coffee for everyone. One of the hot drinks is an extra-large and has a heart drawn on it the lid in white marker, but while Undyne guards it with her life and _shrieks_ at anybody reaching for it, she _refuses_ to drink it.

 _That_ drink is for _Alphys_ , apparently, who comes in a bit after her. Undyne makes a point to run right up to her and offer it, blushing bright crimson the whole time. Alphys barely mutters a thanks before draining it and tossing the empty cup in a nearby wastebin.

There are a few things you learn about Alphys right away; First, she’s a _massive_ , utterly _ripped_ salamander monster with golden scales, maybe only an inch or so shorter than Russ. Second, she’s utterly stoic and serious in her expressions so much so that you’re not even sure she _has_ emotions.

And third? She _haaates_ Sans.

 _Hates_ with a capital _H_ , because it’s the only time you ever see her expression _change_ and you’re _pretty sure_ it’s one that communicates that she has murder on her mind. Sans keeps himself fairly composed and even _dismissive_ of her death-glare as he gives her instructions for the event.

He even _rubs it in_ by not even looking at her, yawning at least _twice_ during their brief conversation, and generally keeping his eye sockets half-lidded and posture relaxed around her. She seems to communicate only in begrudging growls and even stretches her neck out to appear taller and more intimidating, but Sans’ whole body language is _distinctly_ non-threatened, like he doesn’t even _care_.

“Your brother is my _hero_ right now,” you elbow Russ, snickering together in the theatre seats enjoying some doughnuts. “ _Such_ a _badass_.”

“she’s _so_ jealous he got promoted ahead of ‘er,” he chuckles. “’e wasn’ even in th’ royal guard an’ then th’ queen _made_ ‘im a position more important ‘n hers.”

“Why did she do that, anyways?” you ask him. “I mean, I _know_ what Sans… _Did_ , to _earn_ it, but…“

Russ leans in and whispers to you. “alphys… isn’ very _smart_ ,” he says. “she’s tougher than most an’ she _certainly_ _looks_ th’ part in ‘er regalia, but while she’s got good discipline an’ a leader’s attitude, she’s not much good at more ‘n barkin’ orders.”

“Are you two… _FLIRTING??!?_ ”

Russ leans away from you, leaning back in his seat while you turn your head to see Undyne standing there, a half-eaten doughnut in her hand.

“What’ll your _soulmate_ think, _human?_ ” she sneers.

“naw, we were jus’ gossipin’ bout _yer_ girlfriend, ‘dyne,” Russ shrugs nonchalantly.

“Sh-She’s _not_ my g- _girlfriend!_ ” Undyne sputters.

“not fer lack o’ _tryin’_ , though, eh?” he teases. “how many letters ‘re ya gunna send b’fore ya quit tryin’?”

“Sh-sh- _shut up, Mutt!_ ” she hisses.

“ _anyways_ ,” he says, rolling from his seat and rising to stand. “we’d better do one last sweep an’ get int’ position – this thing’s gunna kick off in ‘bout an hour or so.”

“Right,” you say, standing up as well. “You go make sure they’re not fucking around with security at the front, and I’m gunna go smooch my boyfriend then make myself scarce. Meet you upstairs when you’re done?”

“you got it, darlin’,” he winks.

You head down to the band section and then climb up onto the stage, taking the shortest possible path to Sans and fully ignoring the stairs laid out on the far side. Once you’re on the stage you make a beeline for your bone boy, hugging him loosely around his shoulders and kissing the side of his face.

“Hey,” you greet.

“HEY YOURSELF,” he grins. “YOU’RE _VERY_ DISTRACTING SOMETIMES.”

“Want me to go?”

“NO.” He turns to face you and makes a dramatic gesture of looking at his wrist, then shrugs. “BE DISTRACTING. WE’VE GOT TIME.”

You hold his face and kiss him warmly on the mouth, his hands holding you delicately at the waist.

“ _So_ … _This_ is your human, _huh Sans?_ ”

You break off the kiss to find Alphys looming over you.

You give her a big smile and jut out a hand in greeting.

“Name’s _____ _____,” you introduce. “Nice to finally meet you, Captain Alphys.”

She eyes your hand suspiciously, then makes a soft grunting noise as she grasps it in her much larger hand.

Then her expression gets uncomfortable as you shake her hand up and down with clear ease, while she’s apparently struggling with something.

“Careful, Captain,” you address her directly. “You don’t want to break your hand on my _barrier_ , do you?”

 _Obviously_ she was going to try some kind of power move on you, with how much she hates Sans, and if Sans and Russ are any indication of the average monster’s physical strength, she could have _easily_ mangled your hand beyond recognition with a ‘friendly’ handshake. But you didn’t come to this party unprepared.

She jerks her hand away, and you can see how stressed her palm is from attempting to crush you.

“So… The rumours are _true_ , then,” she scoffs.

Having nothing else to say, she turns away from you to see to the Queen, very nearly bowling you over with her massive golden tail.

Sans leans in and you lean down slightly so he can speak into your ear.

“DON’T EMBARRASS HER _TOO_ MUCH,” he whispers, but you can hear the smile on his voice. “I _DO_ HAVE TO STAND NEXT TO HER AT ATTENTION FOR THE NEXT THREE HOURS.”

“Right… Sorry.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alphys: _*glowers at Reader*_
> 
> Undyne: _*fanning self* god_ I wish that were _me._


	38. The Advisor.

“I _really_ don’t think it was a good idea for this event to be open to the _public_ , you know?”

All of the house lights are on as it’s not a regular performance, so you and Russ are completely hidden by the bright lights shining down directly underneath the catwalks. Not a lot of the general public came to the event, but there were enough to fill almost half the seats of the main audience area. You’d gone around with all the extraneous theatre staff and stationed them at all the entrances to the balconies and mezzanine to make sure no one would go up there though, so everybody press _and_ visitor should be centralized in the bottom section.

“’s not like we don’t got a whole _theatre’s_ worth of space – ‘sides, this way common folks can see th’ queen speak for themselves, see we don’ mean any harm. get our message out b’fore the press takes home their tapes an’ edits it to try an’ say somethin’ different.”

“I’ve got a camera down there set up to record the full conference as well, so at least we’ll have our own copy we can distribute before our message gets too muddied,” you add.

“smart thinkin’,” he applauds.

“So what’s the game plan here? I take it that Sans is on stage so he can watch the crowd and signal if he thinks someone looks suspicious, but he doesn’t have a radio?” you ask.

“he’s got signals ‘e uses,” Russ explains. “we do this kinda thing all th’ time – watch.”

You look down at Sans on stage, where he casually puts a gloved hand in front of his mouth and coughs, then picks at his left shoulder as if there’s dust or lint there.

“see? completely casual,” Russ chuckles.

“… Okay, but what did that _mean?_ ”

“one cough means suspicion – no threat yet. then ‘e pretended t’ pick dust off ‘f his left shoulder twice, so we gotta look at th’ left side o’ the room fer two suspects.”

Russ scans the crowd, then nods. “i see ‘em. they jus’ look nervous, not a sign ‘f anythin’ yet.”

He’s so calm and casual about it, but your heart rate just skyrocketed as the reality of the situation sets in. But what if they _are_ here to do something bad? What if they hurt the Queen? What if they hurt _Sans?_

He wraps his arms around you loosely, using his presence to stabilize you. “ _breathe_ , darlin’.”

“I’m… I’m _trying_. What if they _do_ something, though?”

“relax. next step ‘s to jus’ tell undyne who t’ watch.” He lifts his radio to his mouth and hits the call button. “’dyne, y’ see the two humans on the far left sweatin’ like pigs?”

“Yeah, I think I see ‘em,” she radios back.

“keep eyes on ‘em an’ call if they try somethin’.”

“ _Yeah, yeah_.”

He puts it away, holding you for a moment more and stroking a hand over your hair.

“Maybe I could… Go down there? Sit near them and see what they’re up to?” you offer.

“naw. yer our secret weapon, remember?”

“Yeah but I’m _human_ so I’ll just blend in.”

He shakes his head. “sans an’ i want you stayin’ outta trouble. ‘sides,” he grins. “y’ forgot t’ change into yer ‘business pants’, or whatever.”

You had come to the event in your pajamas for the morning, intending to change before the event started, but... Russ found the prop room and you got a _little_ sidetracked.

“Well _whose fault_ is _that_ , Mr. I Found A Cool Pirate Hat?”

“ _arr_ , ye’ve gotta _fine booty_ an’ i be in a _plunderin’_ mood,” he drawls.

You chuckle and swat at him as he pulls away. “… We should focus on what’s going on downstairs,” you say. “It looks like the Queen is starting her address soon.”

“mmm, right,” he concedes. “focus now, plunder later.”

“Oh, _gods_.”

The Queen takes the podium and begins her address.

“Good afternoon, everyone. Thank you all for coming here today. As you may already know, I am Queen Toriel Dreemurr of All Monsters.”

She’s very composed and professional in her demeanor, if a little short with her words.

“Today we would like to announce our intentions when it comes to integrating monsters with human society. Now, I know you must have many questions for me and for my people, but I would please ask that you hold them until we are finished with our address. First I would like to go through and introduce my esteemed staff, whom you will be becoming familiar with as we work together on our goals. To start, I would like to introduce Alphys of Hotland, Captain of our Royal Guard.”

There’s no applause as the Queen stands aside for Alphys to take the podium, which feels a bit rude, but you figure that’s just the crowd. No one’s really heard Queen Toriel speak publicly like this before, so they genuinely just don’t know what to expect.

Alphys mumbles through her piece about the Royal Guard and her duties relating to it. She briefly mentions that while homeland security is still a priority for them, they hope to someday shift their role to something like cultural preservation rather than defense of the kingdom. You sense that maybe she’s not overly happy with that proposed change in direction.

“ _Ohmygawd_ Alphys is _such_ a bae~!” Russ’ radio suddenly flares to life.

He rolls his eye lights and hits the call button. “keep it in yer panties, ‘dyne,” he rumbles.

“ _NEVER!!_ ” she scoffs.

Below, Alphys bows to the Queen and retakes her position, Toriel taking the podium once again. “Thank you, Captain. Moving on, I would like to introduce Sans Aster, my financial advisor and a member of the Royal Guard.”

“… _Financial_ advisor?” you ask, dumbfounded.

Russ elbows you. “sounds _much_ less threatenin’ t’ his enemies than royal _strategist_ , right?”

“I mean I _guess_ …”

Sans quickly bows to the Queen before taking the podium himself. You wince as he looks kinda short behind it, but the microphone comes loose from the stand easily and he steps around it to face the crowd.

What happens next kind of blows your mind, a little bit.

He uses a lot of terminology and figures that you don’t quite grasp, but apparently he’s worked out some serious financial planning. At first you wonder if he might just be play-acting the role up a bit, but from the sounds of it and the serious looks on the faces of people in the crowd far below you, he must have done some _serious_ research to pull this off.

“WE ALSO HAVE A PLAN TO DISSOLVE OUR NATION’S CURRENCY, INTENDING TO UNCOMPLICATE THINGS BY DOING AWAY WITH EXCHANGE RATES AND JUST USING THE LOCAL HUMAN CURRENCY WHEREVER OUR PEOPLE MAY LAND… OUR _SINCEREST APOLOGIES_ , BY THE WAY, TO ANYONE HERE WHO HAS INVESTED IN GOLD OR PLATINUM. WE _MAY_ HAVE BROUGHT THE VALUE DOWN A FAIR BIT,” he smirks.

That actually gets a few chuckles from the audience.

“Oh my god I love him,” you breathe, then realize what you just said. “I… Russ, I’m in love with your brother.”

He’s so utterly charming and _fun_ right now, your soul melts in affection for your shorter of your two boyfriends.

Russ backs up a step. “welp, i’s been fun darlin’, but i guess ‘s my cue t’ tap out now.”

You turn and grab him by his jacket. “Don’t you _dare_.”

Sans finishes his presentation and there’s a mild applause. He bows to his Queen and retakes his position next to Alphys on stage.

“Our Royal Scientist could not be with us today unfortunately,” Toriel lies easily. “She has been working on a green energy plan to address concerns of climate change that we will be eager to share with you all at a later date.”

The radio flares to life. “It’s already _done_ , nerds,” she confidently chuckles.

“braggart,” Russ scolds her.

“ _Excuse me!_ ”

You look down at someone in the press section with their hand raised. Queen Toriel seems faintly annoyed by their interruption. It _is_ pretty rude.

“Please hold all questions to the end, I am just about to begin the main presentation-“

“But Miss Toriel, you haven’t finished introducing your staff,” the guy claims.

“… I beg your pardon?”

“Where is _____ _____?”

You tense up. Russ sucks in a breath.

“Wh… _What??_ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fuck this guy he doesn't even get a name. Also that last line was from Reader, just in case it wasn't clear.


	39. The Conference.

“… And whom might you be?”

There’s a challenging edge to Toriel’s voice that sends a shudder down your spine. No worse than the shudder you felt when you heard your name called out in association with the monsters, though.

The guy introduces himself as a private investigator working on behalf of his client, whom he obviously keeps confidential. He opens a bag and pulls out a glossy photo that you can’t see from this angle, but you’re sure you already know it’s a picture of you and one of the boys.

“During my investigation I’ve determined that Miss _____ has been working as some sort of agent for the monsters. Would you be willing to go into more detail about the role she plays in your service, Miss Toriel?” he pries.

“this ’s _bad_ ,” Russ grumbles. “look ‘t sans, this ‘s _completely_ off-script.”

You don’t even _need_ to look down at Sans to know how tense he is – you can feel it in your soul.

Toriel also doesn’t have any sort of response prepared for this, she’s left floundering. This thing has _completely_ gone off the rails.

“… Russ,” you say. “Send me down there.”

“ _what?_ _no_ , are ya outta yer fuckin’ _mind?_ ”

“This isn’t a good look for Toriel right now, okay? We need to do _something_ to get this back on track,” you reason with him. “Besides, if this guy _wants_ me, then he can _have_ me.”

“… what’s the move?”

“Shortcut me down to just behind the curtains,” you tell him.

“y’ sure you’re ready for that?”

You haven’t been taken on a shortcut since you got back from the void.

“… I _have_ to be.”

You suck in a deep breath as you disappear and reappear from the world again, then Russ kisses your forehead.

“good luck.”

“Thanks.”

He vanishes back to his spot above. Steeling yourself, you step through the curtains.

The bombardment of questions for the Queen comes to an abrupt end when you walk out on stage. You feel Sans jerk in surprise when he sees you, but you keep walking forward towards the podium. The crowd murmurs to each other as they see you in the spotlight.

“Your Majesty,” you greet Toriel. “May I?”

She silently sneers at you, but must realize that there’s little other choice here. She inclines her head slightly and steps away from the podium.

You take the mic and look out at the crowd. You’re _trembling_ , but you do your best to remain composed.

“All right,” you address through the microphone. “I’m here. What do you want?”

The PI seems a bit surprised that you’d actually make an appearance, but readies himself to hit you with some questions. “Miss _____, exactly _what_ is your role in the monsters’ organization?”

“I am working as an independent security contractor and technology specialist,” you explain truthfully. “I have been assisting Queen Toriel and her Royal Scientist in setting up the IT infrastructure and security systems for the new monster embassy building in town, nothing more.”

“And how does your previous work experience for the Department of National Defense affect this position?”

Oh, he’s _good_. “If you dug up my work history with DND from ten years ago, then you must have _also_ noticed my role there was merely entry-level IT support. I never held a clearance level above ‘enhanced reliability’ and I was never privy to any details on Forces’ special projects.”

“So you _say_. But if you _did_ have any sensitive information it could make you a liability when working with a foreign government.”

“Rest assured, I was debriefed appropriately at the end of my stint with the government and have no state secrets to share. I maintain a high degree of confidentiality in all of the jobs I’ve had, having _also_ worked in the legal and real estate fields since then. I was hired by the Queen and her staff because of my high level of professionalism and work ethic, not for any other reason.”

“ _Professionalism_ ,” he scoffs. “And yet you come out on stage in, _what_ , your _pajamas?_ ”

You lean against the podium. “Perk of being an independent contractor – no dress code. Plus I’m so damn good at my job that I can do it in my sleep,” you grin. You can _feel_ Russ _cackling_ from here.

He’s taken aback. “Then, what of your _relationship_ with Mr. _Sans Aster_ , Toriel’s ‘financial advisor’?” the PI guy presses on, and some members of the group make noises of shock and whispered murmurs. “ _Surely_ you have an explanation for why you have been seen in public together several times now?”

Your anger _broils_. You snatch the mic from the podium and come around it to stand at the edge of the stage, glaring the guy down.

“ _Excuse me_ ,” you begin, _barely_ holding it in. “I’m not here today to play twenty questions about me to satisfy your _gossip blog_. I’m here to do a _job_ , and there’s a better time and place for that. You want to talk to me? Then by all means, come talk to _me_.”

“But _not_ here. We’re here today for Queen Toriel’s _address_ , and we are doing her and her people a _monumental_ amount of disrespect by wasting _her time_ and her people’s with this unrelated _derailing_. Now, I expect you’re _quite_ finished with your unwelcome _interrogation_ , so that I may hand the mic back to the monster Queen.”

You wheel around, turning your back fully on them to replace the mic in the podium stand.

“Your Majesty? Please continue with your presentation,” you say to her, stepping away.

Toriel takes a step towards the podium, nodding respectfully towards you. You clasp your hands behind your back and nod towards her. Normally you’d bow, but you don’t want to give these guys the impression that you’re anymore loyal to the Queen than you are your own country.

… You _think_ there might be a faint, _proud_ smirk on her face when you turn away.

You head for the curtains again, throwing Sans a cheeky wink on the way. His eye lights shift to look at you, but he retains his rigid posture and takes a stabilizing breath instead of greeting you in kind. You can feel the affection swelling in him, though, briefly rising above the tension, anxiety, and sheer _outrage_ at this conference being derailed like that.

One you’re through the curtains, you gasp for a breath. _Holy shit_ how the hell did you pull _that_ off?

“ _angel_ , y’ were _amazin’_.”

You throw your arms around Russ and he hugs you back in kind, rubbing his hand up and down the length of your back.

“I did that all on _impulse_ , I _hope_ it was okay,” you breathe.

“yeah, y’ knocked ‘em _dead_ out there. good fuckin’ _job_.”

“But _was_ that okay, though?” you ask, pulling away and rubbing at your eye. “I _know_ you guys didn’t want me out in the spotlight like that.”

“… i know sans ‘ll prob’ly pitch a fit ‘bout it later,” Russ admits. “but we didn’ ‘ave much choice when that guy said yer name. cat was ‘lready outta th’ bag. i mean, ‘s not like ya used _magic_ ‘r anythin’.”

 _Right_ … You wonder who even _hired_ that guy to come find you in the first place. You dread the possibilities.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, _fuck_ that guy.


	40. The Target.

Queen Toriel’s address is a somber one.

She opens by stating that the monsters are at the brink of extinction. Due to their underground home for the last thousand years being limited on space and resources, their society has had to resort to rather unsavory means of keeping their population down, so that the rest may survive and weather their long imprisonment. She obviously doesn’t go into the information you have from Gaster’s memories – that King Minos from hundreds of years ago made the decree ‘kill or be killed’, or how he gratuitously upheld it. But their numbers are very small compared to humans – just a few less than six hundred monsters total. Hardly an army, not even enough to populate a _very_ small rural town.

She goes on to claim that monsters bear no ill will towards humans, which makes you skeptical, but you understand that this is supposed to be an attempt to gain support for her people and some new allies amoung human governments.

Her offer is rather generous, and she’s asking very little when you think about it. They don’t need medical care or any money from any government, having plenty of excess in the latter and their own healing magic covering the former. They have technology they would like to share, particularly green technology that could make a real dent in carbon emissions and climate change. And they’re plenty willing to share everything they know about their physiology and magic with human scientists to collaborate and see if that will lead to some new breakthroughs in monster and human technology.

The three of you – Sans, Russ, and yourself – head out for ice cream afterwards at a nearby place that customizes it by throwing in fruit, chocolates, candies – whatever you want by request. The place is empty except for the three of you and the staff hiding in the back after serving you.

“… Do you really think the Queen was right?” you ask, stirring your melting ice cream looking for any errant gummi bears. “That monsters will be able to just set aside their differences and integrate with humans peacefully?”

“THEY’LL HAVE TO,” Sans asserts. “IF THE _QUEEN_ SAYS THAT’S HOW WE ARE, THEN THAT’S HOW WE _ARE_.”

“ _nobody_ goes against what th’ queen tells us t’ do,” Russ explains, sipping from his ice cream bowl. “her word is absolute, an’ the royal guard keeps ‘er word for her. if any monster falls outta line, they’d get an attitude adjustment from alphys _real_ quick.”

“… SO THAT’S _IT_ , THEN,” Sans says. “THE WAR IS _OVER_.”

He abruptly tosses his plastic spoon into his empty paper bowl, then pushes out his chair and stands, marching stiffly out the door.

“… Sans?”

“… _told_ ya he wasn’ gunna be happy.”

You hesitate a moment, then slide your chair out to follow him.

“_____.”

You turn to Russ.

“… if y’ leave yer ice cream here, ‘m gunna eat it,” he teases you.

“… That’s fine. I should talk to Sans.”

“careful.”

“… Thanks.”

He watches you leave, then goes back to the counter.

“yeah, can i get a couple’a cartons ‘f what they were havin’?”

* * *

“Sans?”

He’s sitting on the curb in a defeated posture, hands against either side of his skull.

You sit down next to him. “Are you okay-“

“WHAT A MAGNIFICENT _WASTE_ OF _TIME_ THAT WAS!” He stands up suddenly, folding his arms behind his back and pacing frantically.

You blink. “… _I_ thought it sounded okay-“

“IF THE WAR IS _OVER_ , THEN _WHY_ DO WE STILL HAVE _ENEMIES?_ ” he growls, holding his hands open in front of him. “WHY ARE OUR PEOPLE STILL BEING SINGLED OUT AND _DUSTED_ ANY TIME THEY VENTURE OUT FROM UNDER THE DAMN MOUNTAIN?”

You look at the people walking by you on the sidewalk of the busy street. You stand and take Sans by the shoulder. “Sans, maybe ranting in public isn’t such a good idea right now-“

He throws your arm off. “WHY DOES IT _MATTER?_ THEY HAVE EYES _EVERYWHERE_ APPARENTLY. THEY SNAPPED A PICTURE OF YOU AND I RIDING THE BUS _THREE WEEKS AGO!_ THEY’VE PROBABLY BEEN DOING THAT THIS WHOLE TIME! HOW COME I DIDN’T EVEN _NOTICE?!_ ”

Undeterred, you take him by the shoulders and hold him steady. “People can be very discrete with their phones,” you tell him. “Anyways, you’re sounding very paranoid right now and I think we should head home.”

“SURE, _MORE_ PHOTO OPPORTUNITIES, _WHY NOT!_ ” he flails.

He grips your hands on his shoulders, taking a long, shaky breath.

“… I’M SORRY FOR MY OUTBURST,” he says, trying to calm himself down. “THE MOST UPSETTING THING ABOUT ALL OF THIS, _APART_ FROM NOT GAINING ANY LEADS, IS THAT THEY MADE _YOU_ A _TARGET_.”

You’re confused. “… Gaining any leads?”

“… WHY DO YOU THINK WE HAD SUCH A PUBLIC VENUE?” he asks, lowering his volume.

“… It was _bait_ ,” you gasp quietly in realization. “You _wanted_ somebody to try something.”

He nods, then eases into you in a hug, still trembling slightly with anger. “THAT ‘PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR’ LEFT RIGHT AFTER YOU DID – UNDYNE’S LOOKING HIM UP,” he explains. “THE TWO OTHER MEN I HAD SUSPICIONS OF NEVER DID ANYTHING, BUT SO FAR WE’VE COME UP WITH NOTHING _SIGNIFICANT_ ON THEM, EITHER.”

“Is there any way I can help? I can troll the internet with Undyne, see what we can find.”

“NO,” he withdraws, holding you gently on your forearms. “I WANT YOU TO STAY OUT OF IT. I DON’T EVEN WANT YOU TO LEAVE THE _HOUSE_ FOR A WHILE.”

“What about groceries?” you ask.

“PAPY AND I WILL GET THEM, OR WE’LL USE A DELIVERY SERVICE. I DON’T _CARE_. NO WALKS WITH NORA, NO ERRANDS, NO TRIPS TO THE EMBASSY – DO YOUR WORK FROM HOME IF YOU MUST. DON’T ACCEPT DELIVERIES OR EVEN ANSWER THE DOOR.”

“… I’m not sure that the house is any safer than out in public,” you point out. “It’s _my_ name is on the title, remember? They can search that in public records.”

“… MAYBE SO, BUT AT LEAST WE WILL KNOW WHERE YOU ARE AND CAN KEEP YOU SAFE THERE.”

Well, that’s it, then. For the time being, you’re under house arrest.


	41. The Vacation.

“I feel like a _sitting duck_ here.”

“I KNOW. I’M SORRY.”

Sure, you’ve spent a large number of your days curled up on the couch since moving here, but it feels different this time. Especially since the entire rest of the world seems to _desperately_ want you to come out and talk to them.

Your cellphone, e-mail, social medias, and LinkedIn have all been blowing up with interview request after interview request. Hell, you were even offered a guest spot on a couple of talk shows!

Pictures of you and Sans have been circulating around the Internet too, and you’re pissed that you didn’t have any idea that they were. You’ve reverse image-searched a couple of them but that just brought you to random Tumblr blogs who were either for or against monsters in general – either propping up your love, or admonishing you for fucking the enemy.

 _Hah_ , if only they knew how sexless your romantic life currently is. And the pervading atmosphere at home is _solidly_ hindering your libido, anyway. You don’t necessarily _blame_ Sans for getting paranoid, the whole situation just kinda… _Sucks_.

You haven’t even told Sans how you _feel_ about him yet. It just doesn’t feel like the right time to bring it up. You don’t even know when the right time will be, stuck in this stalemate.

Sighing, you close your laptop and toss it aside, stretching out to lie down on the couch. You rest your feet on Sans’ lap and he holds your ankles, rubbing small circles into your skin around the jutting bones there.

“… TIRED?”

“ _Bored_ , mostly,” you reply.

“WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO DO?”

“Get _out_. Go for a walk, go shopping, pretty much just be somewhere else,” you sigh. “But I know that’s like, the _one_ thing I _can’t_ do.”

“I KNOW,” he sighs too, leaning into the cushions of the couch. “I JUST DON’T WANT YOU IN ANY POSITION TO BE ACCOSTED BY ANYONE, OR _WORSE_.”

“… You know, it _might_ not be so terrible an idea to take up one of the interview requests I’ve gotten,” you say, sitting up slightly to look at him. “It _could_ help clear the air and get people to _shut up_ about us for a while. Just give them what they want so they’ll leave it.”

“… BUT THE _FIRST_ THING THEY’RE GOING TO ASK ABOUT IS OUR RELATIONSHIP,” Sans frets.

“I’m not really sure I want to go public with that either – I mean we’ve only been together maybe a month, not counting my brief stint in the void,” you point out. “But… I don’t _know_. The whole _point_ to what Toriel’s doing is to just get humans to chill out about monsters and integrating with human society, right? Maybe a human-monster couple could help with that, somehow?”

“YOU WOULD _ALSO_ BE EXPOSING US TO _MONSTERS_ , DON’T FORGET,” he reminds you. “WE DIDN’T HAVE THE _GREATEST_ OPINIONS ON HUMANS BEFORE SURFACING, AFTER ALL.”

He’s right, you begrudgingly admit. Monsters have a very violent society and aren’t taking Toriel’s address very well. The hatred for humans runs deep.

“… MAYBE THAT’S SOMETHING WE SHOULD WORK TO CHANGE,” Sans muses, halting his casual massage of your ankles and feet.

“Huh?” you ask. “I don’t follow, how do you mean?”

He turns and smiles deviously at you. “_____, HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO TAKE A FEW DAYS OF VACATION?”

“… Where to?”

“UNDERGROUND.”

You blink. “… But didn’t you _just_ say it was dangerous?”

“I HAVE WAYS TO ENSURE A SAFE STAY FOR US,” he grins. “ALSO, IT OCCURS TO ME THAT MONSTERS _WILL_ HAVE TO GET OVER IT SOMEDAY IF THEY WANT TO LIVE ON THE SURFACE ALONGSIDE HUMANS. PLUS MOST OF THEM DON’T REALIZE THAT THEY COULD POTENTIALLY FIND THEIR _SOULMATE_ ABOVEGROUND, OR THAT HUMAN SOULMATES ARE EVEN _POSSIBLE_ FOR US MONSTERS.”

So, what, he wants to parade you around like you’re some kind of celebrity couple? … Aren’t fan blogs on Tumblr already _doing_ that?

“I’m… _Sorry_ Sans, but I’m _really_ not convinced.”

“IT WOULD BE A CHANGE OF SCENERY,” he bargains. “YOU’LL GET TO SEE WHERE I GREW UP, AND NOT JUST THROUGH MY MEMORIES OF THE PLACE. PLUS I CAN KEEP YOU ONE _HUNDRED_ _PERCENT SAFE_ , I _GUARANTEE_ IT.”

… Admittedly, it _might_ help to improve your mood.

“What about Nora?”

“SHE CAN COME TOO! OR, PAPYRUS CAN LOOK AFTER HER HERE WHILE WE’RE GONE. IT’S UP TO YOU!” he beams.

“… What about Russ? Is he coming too?”

He shrugs awkwardly. “… HE WILL HAVE TO STILL GO TO WORK – HE DOES MORE FOR THE QUEEN THAN JUST RENOVATIONS AND RUNNING ERRANDS, HE GUARDS HER AND UNDYNE AS MUCH AS I DO. BUT HE’S _MORE_ THAN WELCOME TO JOIN US WHEN HE’S AVAILABLE.”

“Well… Alright, I guess a couple days couldn’t hurt,” you agree.

“MWEHEHEH, FANTASTIC!! I JUST NEED TO CONFIRM WITH THE QUEEN AND THEN WE CAN LEAVE RIGHT AWAY!”

* * *

It turns out he had to check with Toriel first if Alphys could cover his post for a few days and basically trade jobs, meaning that Alphys was guarding the Queen (something the butch lizard woman seemed thrilled about, not to mention Undyne who _immediately_ started hyperventilating), and that Sans was going to be acting leader of the Royal Guard for the three days of leave he’d gotten approved.

So, the trip still had a work component for both of the boys, which wasn’t ideal. But they seemed excited about it nonetheless.

“HER MAJESTY ACTUALLY ENJOYED MY IDEA OF SHOWING YOU OFF TO THE MONSTERS,” Sans explained once he got back from the embassy. “A HUMAN IN MONSTER SOCIETY MIGHT JUST BE THE WAKE-UP CALL SOME OF OUR PEOPLE NEED. TIMES HAVE CHANGED; WE NEED TO BE THINKING ABOUT WHAT THE FUTURE’S GOING TO LOOK LIKE AND HOW TO GET THERE.”

“I’m just surprised she approved your partial leave in the first place – I still don’t know about any of that other stuff,” you tell him.

He takes your face in his hands as he beams up at you, brushing a lock of hair out of the way with one of his thumbs. “I WILL BE RIGHT BY YOUR SIDE EVERY STEP OF THE WAY,” he reassures you.

You smile, loosely hugging him around his shoulders. “Is there anything special I should bring?”

He shrugs. “CLOTHES, MAYBE A SWIMSUIT, YOUR NICE UNDERWEAR…”

You chuckle. “Oh, it’s _that_ kind of trip, is it?”

“get a _room_ , you two,” Russ playfully groans.

Sans turns in your arms and you hold him against your chest. “ALREADY DID,” he grins, digging into his pocket and pulling out a key with a tag hanging off of it. “AT THE NTT UNDERGROUND RESORT.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me: _*writes myself into a corner because now Reader can't leave the house or do anything cool*_
> 
> Me: ...
> 
> Me: ... Naw fuck this let's send them on vacation.


	42. The Resort.

Before you can start your vacation with Sans (and Russ to a lesser degree), there are a couple of things the boys and you need to get sorted out.

First stop, the entrance to Underground. The Queen wanted you to set a modified barrier at the mouth of the cave that would permit only monsters and yourself, and you were more than happy to oblige. The two rabbit guards weren’t pleased to see a human, but Sans was able to quickly make them stand down with a cutting glare. Barrier in place, you followed him down into the castle.

Next was the changing of the guard. Alphys and Sans had a brief staring contest, then she scoffed and sneered at him, grabbing Russ’ hand and disappearing from sight as he drops her off in Ottawa. After that, Sans turned to the assembled Royal Guards – all white rabbit monsters of varying shapes and sizes, but all clad in that distinct Royal Guard armour – folding his arms behind him and clearing his throat.

“GUARDSMEN,” he addresses them. “AS YOU SHOULD HAVE ALREADY BEEN BRIEFED, MY HUMAN SOULMATE _____ AND I ARE TO BE STAYING IN THE UNDERGROUND FOR THREE DAYS. DURING OUR VISIT I WILL BE YOUR ACTING COMMANDER. WITH THE NEW BARRIER IN PLACE AT THE SUMMIT I WILL BE GIVING YOU REDUCED DUTIES. HOWEVER, I EXPECT YOU TO STILL UPHOLD THE VALUES OF THE ROYAL GUARD, AND IF MY SOULMATE IS EVER THREATENED, YOU ARE EXPECTED TO COME TO HER _IMMEDIATE_ DEFENSE.”

Oh wow, so the _whole Royal Guard_ is going to have your back? No wonder he was so confident about your safety.

“I TRUST YOU HAVE NO QUESTIONS?” Sans says, a challenging edge to his tone.

Assorted grumbles and murmurs run through the rabbit guards, but no one speaks up.

“With all of _that_ settled,” you say, turning around fully with your dog in your arms, who immediately stands and sniffs the air between you and the guards, wagging her tail and chirping an excited bark. “This is my dog Nora, and she wants to be best friends with _all_ of you.”

Timidly, a couple of the rabbit monsters approach, then eventually all of them. Nora gets scritches, head pats, and a couple of rabbit noses got close enough to kiss, which you know has _absolutely_ made her _year_.

Last but not least, Sans held a mini press conference briefly introducing you to all of the monsters. There were gasps of shock and outrage as he said that you were his soulbonded soulmate, and that you’re here with Sans to represent the future of humans and monsters.

After that, it was time to get to the resort hotel.

“This is the biggest bed I’ve ever seen in my life,” you gasp.

“AND IT _WOULD_ FIGURE THAT NORA WOULD _IMMEDIATELY_ STRETCH OUT IN THE EXACT MIDDLE OF IT,” he rolls his eyes, grinning.

You and Sans lie down on the bed on either side of her, relaxing into the super plush mattress. Nora squirms up to his face and starts licking his nasal passage, while he chuckles and gently holds his hand over her nose to get her to stop.

“So what’s next on our itinerary?” you ask.

“WE HAVE AN HOUR TO KILL AND THEN I BOUGHT US A SPA PACKAGE HERE AT THE RESORT. AFTER THAT, DINNER IN THE RESORT RESTAURANT,” he rolls his eye lights. “I HAD TO BUY THE RESERVATION OFF OF A PYROPE TO GET IT ON SUCH SHORT NOTICE.”

“… You ‘bought’ a reservation?”

“NTT RESORT RESTAURANT IS THE MOST POPULAR FINE DINING ESTABLISHMENT IN ALL OF UNDERGROUND – AND, COINCIDENTALLY, THE _ONLY_ FINE DINING RESTAURANT,” he explains. “THERE ARE NEVER ANY TABLES AVAILABLE FOR WALK-INS, SO WE HAVE TO RESERVE WEEKS IN ADVANCE AND SOMETIMES THOSE RESERVATIONS ARE MADE JUST TO BE BOUGHT, SOLD, OR TRADED FOR FAVOURS.”

“Geez, it must be a pretty fancy place to be in such high demand.”

“WELL… IT’S AN UNFORGETABLE EXPERIENCE, I CAN PROMISE YOU _THAT_ ,” he snickers.

“So, what _is_ ‘NTT’ anyways? What does that stand for?”

“OH! RIGHT, YOU WOULDN’T KNOW,” he says, bouncing against the bed to a sitting position and reaching for the alarm clock on the nearby nightstand. “NTT IS SHORT FOR NAPSTATON – THEY’RE A LOCAL CELEBRITY MUSICIAN.”

“What kind of music do they do?”

“IT’S HARD TO GIVE IT A SPECIFIC GENRE, BUT PERHAPS ‘ELECTRONICA’ IS THE CLOSEST I CAN COMPARE IT TO,” he says, reading some instructions on the top for the radio. “NAPSTATON HAS A SOUL OF PATIENCE THOUGH, SO IT TAKES AN EXTREMELY LONG TIME FOR THEM TO RELEASE AN ALBUM – ABOUT TWENTY YEARS OR SO. THEY’RE AN EXTREME PERFECTIONIST. BUT WHEN THEY DO, IT’S LIKE EXPERIENCING PURE, DISTILLED EMOTION.”

“HERE IT IS,” he says, grinning brightly. “AH, BUT MAYBE WE SHOULD LEAVE THIS FOR ANOTHER TIME, ON SECOND THOUGHT,” he comments, setting the alarm clock back down. “NTT’S ALBUMS EACH CONTAIN ONLY ONE SONG, AND MY FAVOURITE ALBUM ‘BLISS’ IS ELEVEN HOURS ELEVEN MINUTES LONG. IF WE START IT NOW WE MIGHT MISS OUR APPOINTMENT.”

“… Eleven _hours??!_ ”

“ _TRUST_ ME, IT’S WORTH _EVERY SECOND_ ,” he beams.

“You must be a pretty big fan,” you point out, smiling. His nerding out about Napstaton is kind of cute.

He shrugs, his cheekbones getting that indigo tint. “NTT’S FLAGSHIP ALBUM ‘AGONY’ WAS A TURNING POINT FOR ME WHEN I WAS YOUNG. I… _ALSO_ MIGHT’VE HAD A CRUSH ON THEM, BUT THEY’RE VERY SECRETIVE AND DON’T MAKE TOO MANY PUBLIC APPEARANCES. I STILL HAD A FEW OF THEIR POSTERS, THOUGH.”

“UHH, ENOUGH ABOUT NTT THOUGH,” he blushes, rubbing his cervical vertebrae. “HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO SPEND THE NEXT HOUR OF OUR VACATION TOGETHER?”

“Hmm,” you grin, grabbing the sides of his open Hawaiian shirt and pulling him down to you. “I _think_ I may have an idea or two.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Decided NTT is non-binary because 'gender would interfere with their art' XD Admittedly I originally narrated them as 'he' so if I missed any errant wrong pronouns in here or in later chapters please let me know so I can fix them.
> 
> Also, prepare yourselves for an unknown amount of fluff chapters, because I've just realized that there's like, a _lot_ of fun monster culture stuff that I can just make up as I go. For instance, I've swapped the bunny civilians in Snowdin for the dog guards, so now the rabbits are the guards and the dogs are the citizens. Because I fscking _can_.


	43. The Dinner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SANS TOUCHES THE BOOB. It's only like two lines but here's your NSFW-ish warning for the chapter - light boob fondling ahead XD

Sans rolls his eye lights and huffs, his phone pressed to the side of his head as he soaks in the sudsy bubble bath you’re taking together. “OF _COURSE_ SHE DIDN’T FIND ANYTHING – IT’S _ALPHYS_ ,” he bemoans. “DO YOU MIND CHECKING IT AGAIN, OR DO I HAVE TO COME BACK THERE?”

“Security sweep turned up nothing?”

He gives you an apologetic look, holding up a bony finger to ask you to please wait a moment. You nod.

“… ALRIGHT, THANKS PAPY. I’LL REVIEW THE CAMERA FOOTAGE WITH UNDYNE LATER.”

He hangs up the phone, setting it aside with a clatter and groans.

“SORRY,” he says, sighing heavily. “I KNOW YOU DON’T WANT TO SPEND OUR VACATION TOGETHER LISTENING TO ME WORK.”

“It’s okay, I know how important it is to you,” you forgive easily. “I’m worried about things back home, too.”

“… I MAY NOT HAVE EVER EXPLAINED HOW UNUSUAL OUR SITUATION IS TO YOU,” he realizes, opening his sockets and looking at you remorsefully. “NORMALLY ROYAL GUARDSMEN DON’T _GET_ VACATIONS. IT’S ACTUALLY NOT TYPICAL FOR THEM TO HAVE RELATIONSHIPS, EITHER – _NOTHING_ SHOULD BE MORE IMPORTANT TO THEM THAN THEIR SERVICE TO THE QUEEN,” he explains.

“Oh, really?” you say, surprised.

“SOULMATES ARE A BIT OF AN UNSPOKEN EXCEPTION, THOUGH,” he winks.

“So how come Toriel gave you a few days off, then?”

He groans. “SHE’LL CALL IT A FAVOUR AND EXPECT SOMETHING FROM ME LATER, MOST LIKELY.”

“Figures.”

Earlier the staff here at the NTT Resort had caked both of your bodies in a rejuvenating clay, then steamed it off of you with warm vapours and given you both a couple’s massage and salt scrub. You’re now currently enjoying a foamy bubble bath together with Jacuzzi jets coaxing you into even deeper relaxation, the fragrant suds popping up by your face and releasing a distinct floral scent.

You were right – going on a vacation has _definitely_ helped your mood.

“… They’re going to leave us alone for a while, right?” you ask, breaking the comfortable silence.

“I THINK THIS IS THE LAST THING ON THE ITINERARY – WE JUST SOAK FOR FIFTEEN MINUTES AND THEN TOWEL OURSELVES OFF AND LEAVE,” he explains. “… WHY?”

“No reason,” you grin.

And then you pull your untied bikini top up out of the water, setting it along the side of the large tub. Then you lean back and fold your arms above your head.

Sans’ jaw has slackened, eye lights following your every move, and then locking on to yours as his skull is engulfed in that indigo hue.

“… It _kind_ of came untied on its own with the jet in the middle of my back,” you explain, shrugging. “We don’t _have_ to do anything, I just thought I’d tease you a little bit.”

His gaze drifts downwards at your chest, still vaguely concealed by bubbles and foam. “… MAY I?”

“Sure.”

He wades over to you, holding you gently at your sides and kissing you tenderly, and you’re not sure if he’s hesitating or if he’s just trying to savour this moment – either way, you’re happy to let him go at his own pace.

Then he slowly brings his hands around to your front, his feather-light touches buffered by the steaming water as he cradles your breasts and gently weighs them in his hands. He breaks off the kiss to look down, his face lit up dark lavender as he explores your body, brushing his hard thumbs over your nipples.

“… THEY _FLOAT_ ,” he mutters to himself, innocently amused. “I WASN’T EXPECTING THAT.”

“Maybe we should go back to the room and have a bit of fun before dinner?” you suggest, smirking.

“BUT THEN YOU’LL HAVE TO PUT YOUR TOP BACK ON,” he protests. “AND I CAN’T LET YOU DO _THAT_.”

You chuckle and he moves in for another kiss…

… Right as his phone buzzes along the far edge of the hot tub.

“FUCK’S _SAKE_ ,” he curses, kissing you anyways.

You break off the kiss giggling. “Aren’t you going to answer it?

“ _NAH_.”

“The embassy could be on fire.”

“ALPHYS CAN SWAT IT OUT WITH HER BIG DUMB TAIL, I DON’T CARE.”

The phone buzzes insistently again, and he rolls his eye lights and groans as he finally goes to answer it.

* * *

“Okay, so when I ordered a steak in the shape of NTT’s _face_ …”

“YOU DIDN’T EXPECT THAT YOU’D GET _EXACTLY_ WHAT YOU ORDERED, RIGHT?”

After toweling off and heading back to the room to get dressed in your fancy dinner clothes (well, after fooling around for a bit), you came back down just in time for your dinner reservation. The starter courses were lovely, the wine is chilled perfectly, and the main course has been served.

“I just wasn’t expecting it to be so… _Eccentric?_ ” you say, giggling to yourself. “I almost feel _bad_ that I have to cut this with a knife. It’s a literal _portrait_ of a person.”

“DON’T FEEL TOO STRANGELY ABOUT IT – YOU’LL LET IT GET COLD,” he playfully chastises you, swirling his wine glass. “THIS IS PRETTY STANDARD FOR NTT RESORT. YOU GET USED TO IT.”

“Okay, so do I like, cut off their chin first? Or maybe through an eye?”

Sans snickers. “HOWEVER YOU LIKE. AND HEY, AT LEAST IT’S ACTUAL _MEAT_ NOW – IT USED TO BE MADE FROM CAVE MUSHROOMS AND WAS MORE OF A MEATLOAF THAN A STEAK.”

“That doesn’t sound like it was very good,” you admit.

“NO, IT _WAS_ GOOD, _EXTREMELY_ SAVOURY ACTUALLY – BUT THEY STILL SHAPE IT AS IF IT WERE A MUSHROOM MEATLOAF, I SUPPOSE,” he shrugs.

Old traditions die hard, you figure. “… Do you think our visit is going well? I mean, _besides_ how much fun we’ve been having with each other,” you clarify. “Do you think monsters are being accepting of us?”

Sans’ smile turns down slightly, draining his glass and setting it aside. He leans forward slightly. “… SORT OF,” he says conspiratorially. “WE’VE BEEN GETTING A _LOT_ OF LOOKS, ATTRACTING A LOT OF ATTENTION, BOTH GOOD AND BAD… _MOSTLY_ BAD. BUT, MONSTERS JUST AREN’T USED TO THE IDEA OF HUMANS NOT BEING THE ENEMY.”

“So… It’s not really _working_ , is it?”

“HEY,” he says, reaching across the table and taking one of your hands in his, massaging his fingers against your knuckles. “DON’T MIND THEM, IT’S BEEN A LONG THOUSAND YEARS SO IT WILL JUST TAKE SOME TIME. BESIDES, MY ONLY _REAL_ DESIRE IS TO SHOW YOU A WONDERFUL TIME DOWN HERE. WE DON’T _HAVE_ TO FIX EVERYTHING BETWEEN HUMANS AND MONSTERS _TODAY_.”

“You’re right,” you smile, relaxing under his touch. “But I’m going to need my hand back if I’m going to cut into this steak, you know.”

“RIGHT!” he says, letting you go as you pick up your knife. “HAVE YOU MADE A DECISION ON WHERE TO START?”

“I was thinking I’d give them a haircut first, and then work my way down from there,” you laugh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reason I got stuck on this one was the boob fondling - I just kind of lost interest with the idea as soon as I'd had it? That's why it doesn't go on for very long.
> 
> Also, I might take the sinnamon roll's V-card soon, I'll warn ahead and asterisk the chapter when it happens. This fic is fully on board with the explicit rating so expect stuff like that sprinkled in here and there.


	44. The Spider.

After a fumbling makeout session after dinner (Sans can _really_ put wine away if he wants to), you both curled up on the massive bed for sleep. Nora’s gotten herself wedged in between the two of you, which basically nixed any chance of cuddling, but Sans is adorably snuggled into her back, his slight hands curled into her fur as they snore together softly.

You’re happily looking at the both of them, dozing off yourself, when a hard hand gently grips your shoulder.

“hey. y’ still awake, darlin’?”

You relax. It’s just Russ.

You roll towards him yawning. His cheekbones flare up orange-red when he catches a glimpse of what you’re wearing.

“Hey Russ,” you match his whisper. “What’s up?”

He slides his hands back into the pockets of his weathered jeans as he looks pointedly away from you. “y’know i _hate_ to ask ya t’ put some more clothes on, but… i’ve a mind t’ take ya out somewhere tonight. i’s a bit chilly there so yer gunna want somethin’ warmer than that.”

He wants to take you on a date tonight too? Well, how could you say no? You still haven’t spent a ton of time with Russ, even after the whole double soulmates and polyamory things were laid out on the table.

“… I can throw some pants on, maybe a cardigan,” you shrug.

“great. i’ll coax nora out from under m’ bro so she can do ‘er business while ya swap clothes.”

* * *

The nightie isn’t exactly comfortable to wear under clothes, so you had to switch for your regular boring underwear after all. You know that Russ won’t mind though if this evening goes about how you expect it to.

After all, there’s only one place in the Underground that’s cold like he described, and that’s Snowdin. Home of Muffet’s pastry shop and spiced cider bar, and the Snowed Inn. Russ’ old stomping grounds.

He gave you his jacket before shortcutting you there, and you pulled your sleeves through the arm holes in pride. The colour didn’t leave his face for a full minute as he just admired you.

“… Weren’t we on our way to somewhere?” you ask, flattered at the attention.

“right! right, yeah, hold on tight,” he flusters.

It’s still a bit uncomfortable travelling through the void, but once you open your eyes again, you’re in front of Muffets.

“it occurred t’ me that sans ‘s gunna wanna show ya all th’ nice parts o’ the underground,” Russ explains, a smile on his rough voice. “so i guess it falls t’ me t’ show ya the _seedier_ parts ‘f it. first stop; muffets.”

“… Is it a good idea for us to walk in together like this?” you ask self-consciously, pulling his coat closed around you. “I mean… I’m here as _Sans’_ bonded soulmate, and…”

Russ pulls you in for a long kiss that melts you all the way down to your already frozen toes inside your beat up running shoes. “i don’t care,” he breathes as he pulls away. “they’re gunna gossip anyway, so _let_ ‘em.”

Then he takes your hand in his firmly and tugs you along behind him as he pushes open the door.

You feel a spiderweb break across your face, and panic as you try and clear the sticky threads from your skin.

“darlin’?”

“Spiderweb, _blech_ ,” you complain. He turns to you and helps you clear it from your face and hair, and that helps you calm down a bit. You probably should’ve expected that coming in here – After all, Muffet’s a spider monster.

“Hey Russ! Long time no see,” a cat monster purrs as she instantly drapes herself over his arm, peeling him away from you intent on dominating his attention. She’s barely wearing a bikini, in this weather?

Then again, cat monster. The fur probably helps.

“catty, y’ mind?” Russ complains, crooking a brow. “’m here wit’ a special guest.”

She looks down at you dismissively. “What’s so special about her?” she scoffs.

“Come play with _us_ , Russy,” another female monster clings to him from the other side, wearing a bit more clothing on account of her crocodile-like appearance.

“bratty, c’mon,” he sighs. “i ain’t even sat down yet.”

“… Friends of yours?” you ask.

“acquaintances. _barely_ ,” he rolls his eye lights. He lifts his arms high forcing them both to release him, then takes you by the shoulders and steers you towards the bar. You hear the two girls huff and hiss behind you.

“Well well _well_ , look what the _Mutt_ dragged in,” the spider bartender chuckles. “Ahuhuhuhu~! And it’s been _such_ a long time since I’ve had a _human_ patron! What can I get for _you_ , sweetheart?”

… It hasn’t been _that_ long, but you keep your mouth shut about it. After all, in Sans’ memories…

“A hot chocolate sounds nice,” you say, barely scanning the menu.

… He’d brought the human kid here for a hot chocolate to warm them up.

“make it a spiked one, but no poison,” Russ adds. “gotta get ‘er back t’ my bro in one piece, yeah?”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” she winks with the left half of her face, before disappearing through a webbed curtain into a back room.

Russ nudges you where he’s leaned against the counter. “y’ can order food too if yer not too full from dinner,” he suggests. “i jus’ wanted t’ show you m’ old stomping grounds.”

“… Tell me more about this place,” you resolve to say. “I mean, I have a lot of _memories_ of it, but… I want your take on it.”

“well, y’ can already guess muffet’s a spider, but she’s also an avid baker an’ bartender,” he explains. “an’, if y’ got the gold, she can be a good source ‘f information or things that ‘r hard t’ get a hold of. sometimes i think she started the bar jus’ so she could get all th’ gossip goin’ around underground. she’s got ‘er fingers in all kinds ‘a webs.” 

“And it’s worked out _very well_ for me and my business, ahuhuhu~” she returns, two mugs gripped in two hands and two menus gripped in two other hands of hers, setting them all down neatly in front of the two of you. “My little spider cousins and I are _very_ comfortable down here~!”

“but don’t _ever_ go inta debt wit’ her,” Russ warns. “else y’ might find yerself marked for prey.”

That cryptic warning aside, he takes the mug set in front of you and takes a big swig of it, then sets it back down. Muffet huffs, folding two pairs of arms with her third set of hands against her hips.

“What, don’t you _trust_ me, Mutt? After _all this time?_ I’m wounded,” she pouts dramatically.

“_____’s here on official business, jus’ gotta be sure,” he shrugs. “i’s safe, y’ can drink it.”

At Russ’ insistence, you do chance a swig of it. It’s hot, but not burn-off-your-tastebuds-for-a-day hot, and there’s definitely a kick of alcohol to it, but other than _that_ …

“Son of a _bitch_ , that’s _good_ ,” you announce. It’s creamy with notes of honey, hazelnut, and is that cinnamon sprinkled on top? It’s the best hot chocolate you’ve ever had.

Muffet giggles. “I didn’t expect Sans’ bonded to be quite so _blunt_ ,” she playfully observes.

“’s what i like about ‘er, she always says what she means,” Russ adds admiringly.

“I just hate beating around the bush is all,” you shrug, cradling the mug between your hands. “More people should just spit out what they mean the _first_ time around. I’m too old for games.”

“That’s very like Sans,” she grins toothily. “So how did you two meet?”

You chance a glance at Russ, him having just told you that Muffet thrives off of gossip as sort of the undergrounds’ information broker, and while she’s giving you a warm look you can’t help but feel a touch threatened by someone so… _Influential_.

Nevertheless, Russ shrugs and you take that as giving you the go ahead. He knows you won’t spill the beans about your barriers – the Royal Guards had to know because you had to make a new one at the cave entrance and out in the ruins upon arrival, but other than that it’s still to be a secret from both humans and monsters.

“We happened to be taking a coach bus together when it crashed – I got up to check that everyone was okay, and Sans was suspicious that I wasn’t freaking out like everyone else,” you tell the story. “He wanted to take me in for questioning but I pushed him out of my way as I moved past him to check on everyone else. I guess… I left an impression on him? And Russ here was the one to figure out it was because we were soulmates.”

You feel comfortable enough to tell more of the story, leaving out all the magic parts of it and the whole thing with Gaster, making small jokes about some of your misadventures together and making her laugh. A small crowd gathers around you and they start asking you questions, which you and Russ field with intoxicated ease as she brings out some ciders and croissants to whet your appetites, encouraging more of your tale.

The hour gets later than you anticipated, and after a while Russ covers the bill and takes you back out into the snow for the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyy guess who's back on her bullshit with multiple chapters in one day? I JUST wrote this. Right now. Hot off the word processor.
> 
> Next chapter I have a steamy makeout session with Russ planned, but we'll see what _actually_ happens. I don't personally know.


	45. The Inn.*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Russ and Reader get to talk about their relationship... While also kissing, touching, fondling, and being nearly naked. NSFW themes ahead, hence the asterisk. No sex though, that's still to come ;D

“… _Really?_ ”

The dog monster at the desk of the Snowed Inn eyes you suspiciously as Russ walks you in there.

“y’ gotta room or what?” Russ demands, also tired and a bit buzzed from your long night out at Muffets.

She sighs and rolls her eyes, tossing him a key. Russ thanks her, then steers you towards the stairs.

Once you get into the room and he slides his jacket off your shoulders, you slowly start to snap back into reality as you realize where you are.

His hands rest at your neck as he leans down to kiss you, and you put your hands over his gently to stop him.

“… This is the room, isn’t it?”

He freezes slightly, running his hands down to rest at your shoulders. “… we don’ haf t’ do anythin’, i know yer tired,” he says, a sigh on his voice.

“No, I don’t want to reject you,” you insist, taking his hands and interlacing your fingers with his. “I just… I dunno, it feels maybe a little… _Weird?_ Sorry, I know that’s probably rude to say…”

“just… why _here_ , right?” he suggests.

You nod. You know the history of this room for him, and that’s admittedly a bit uncomfortable even if you can’t exactly fault him for it. He’s _allowed_ to have a sex life, to have had other partners before you, because of _course_ he is – it’s not like you’re a virgin yourself, that’s _long_ gone – it’s just… You just can’t put your finger on it.

“… It feels like I’m intruding on a piece of your past,” you finally say. “I’m mixed up with so many memories that aren’t my own, and I just feel like… Maybe I shouldn’t be in here.”

He leans down and kisses you firmly on the mouth. “ya ain’t intrudin’ on shit,” he reassures you bluntly. “i wanted y’ to at least see it in person. ‘s like i’m… layin’ my sins bare for ya or somethin’. like… i _want_ y’ to be here, ‘cause i want someone _important_ t’ me to be in here with me fer once.”

“Russ, you don’t have to feel ashamed of your past. Not with me. I get it,” you reassure him.

“you _say_ that, but…”

“But you’re still doubting that you’re worthy of it,” you add.

He takes a step back, letting your hands go to rub at his cervical vertebrae anxiously. “… ‘m still not used t’ this goin’ steady thing. i don’ know _what_ ‘m doin’…”

You realize belatedly that maybe some of the memories he made in here weren’t exactly ones he treasures. Maybe the shame isn’t coming from the fact that he’s _had_ so many one-night stands, but maybe… Because he doesn’t know how a long-term relationship is actually supposed to _work_.

Let alone a polyamorous one including his younger brother, and a human he bonded with in a panic to save his life when Sans’ bond wasn’t enough to save you on its own. It all just happened so _fast_.

You peel out of your cardigan and nod towards the bed. “Get comfy. We’re gunna have a talk, and we can still make out a bit while we’re at it,” you wink at him.

Those seem to be the magic words, because he peels out of his muscle shirt and plops down on the bed so quick it creaks as it bounces. You strip down to your tank top and panties and climb in next to him, pulling the warm covers up over the both of you. He keeps his hands at a distance, just admiring you with a burnt crimson red glow around his angular cheekbones, so you’re the one to scoot closer to him, running your fingers over his cracked and scarred ribs and leaving soft kisses against his collarbones.

“i take it sans hasn’ taken off ‘is shorts yet,” Russ drawls, bringing his arm around you to hold your back and fiddle with your hair.

“Naw, but earlier I _did_ get him to touch my boobs, so that’s something,” you shrug.

“lucky bastard.”

“We were gunna talk about _you_ , though,” you remind him teasingly.

“do we _have_ to? maybe _i_ wanna touch yer boobs,” he snickers.

“You can do that too, but don’t get _too_ distracted,” you laugh.

You sit up and your tank top is discarded, just down to your cotton panties. His hands start gently exploring your body as well, stroking the skin of your back, up to your neck and down your arm, shifting to your side and exploring the curve of your hip.

While you don’t mind his touch or the exploration of his hand, something about being with Russ in this environment makes you feel a little more bare than usual. His fingers gently run over the side of your hip… And he notices.

He sits up slightly to look. “what ‘re these li’l veiny divets here?” He traces his fingers along them curiously.

“Uhh, stretch marks,” you point out. “Sans noticed them a while ago too… I guess when I was a teenager I developed really quickly? So, I got them all over my hips, over my boobs, and the insides of my thighs even. Most of them have faded over time, but those ones still kind of have a texture.”

“never seen that before,” he notes, sitting up more to kiss the side of your hip, then rub his hand over it. “’s nothin’ to be self-conscious about, angel. it adds character, an’ y’ look amazin’ either way.”

Geez, he probably picked that up from the soulbond. “You _know_ , we were supposed to be talking about _you_ , remember?” you deflect, pouting.

“what, my distractin’ touches aren’t distractin’ _enough?_ ” he protests. “i can fix that, y’ know.”

You know your face goes red hot at the sultry look he’s throwing you. But you swallow hard and try to stay on track. “Tell me what you want, Russ. What do you want out of a relationship?”

“i don’t _know_ , an’ that’s the problem,” he sighs, dropping his hand and shifting to lay on his back. You shift up to lean on your elbow so you can still see his eye lights.

“Can you talk to me about it?” you ask gently. “Please?”

He looks up at you and smiles warmly. “i can’t say no t’ _that_ face… fine. i’s like… i want _basic_ stuff – i wanna like… kiss you, hold you, i wanna _bone_ ya pretty damn _bad_ ,” he admits bluntly. “but i don’ want any o’ that bigger stuff that _sans_ wants like… gettin’ _hitched_ , ‘r fancy dining, romantic dates ‘r whatever. an’ i don’t know that like, tha’s _enough?_ fer a relationship? to jus’ wanna bone somebody like, a _whole lot?_ ”

“So maybe commitment stuff just isn’t for you,” you observe. “There’s nothing _wrong_ with that, you know?”

“but i’s somethin’ _you_ want,” he points out. “sorry… yer last ex. tha was the whole point ‘f you movin’ out to london, yeah?”

Ugh, did he _have_ to remind you of _him?_ “Want _ed_. Past tense. I sort of gave up after him. And anyways… I mean, I could probably _still_ have that with Sans, couldn’t I?”

“but not wit’ me.”

“But that’s _okay_ with me, you know? Besides, I can’t exactly marry two guys under the current laws anyways,” you explain.

He goes quiet for a moment, staring past you as he’s lost in his thoughts.

“… Would you want to, um… Would _I_ be enough?” you ask. “Or… Would you still want to be able to see other girls?” Because you’re not sure you could accommodate that, but since you’re _also_ dating Sans…

His eye sockets widen as his eye lights focus on you again. “ _fuck_ no. angel, yer _plenty_. i don’t need ‘em anymore if i’ve got you.”

You’re not sure how that makes you feel. He sits up and cradles your face in his hands, looking deeply into your eyes. “listen, like… i kinda swore ‘em off anyways ‘s soon as i figured out i got it _bad_ fer ya, e’en before i acknowledged th’ soulmates thing. i want you, _only_ you, from here on out… i jus’ don’ know how any o’ this ‘s supposed t’ _work_.”

You hold his wrists gently in your hands. “… What did you say to me, when you talked about what soulmates are supposed to do together? Do you remember?”

He looks mildly uncomfortable as he can’t seem to recall it. “… i remember explainin’ soulbondin’ to ya,” he says.

“Yeah, that, but also just that we’re supposed to just _be_ together, and that it’s supposed to be like a regular relationship, only it feels stronger,” you remind him. “I was all caught up in ‘what are we _supposed_ to do’ like there was supposed to be some _grand purpose_ to it or something, and _you_ were the one who told me that it’s not… That we can just take things easy and just see how or where it goes.”

“So why don’t we just do _that?_ ” you suggest. “Just… Stop trying to put a _label_ on this or get wrapped up in what relationships are ‘supposed’ to be like, and just be together in whatever way we _want?_ ”

There’s a long pause between the two of you, Russ’ mouth hanging open as he considers your words.

Then he throws you a look so sweltering it could melt all of the snow outside into _steam_.

“angel, you’re so fuckin’ _smart_. ‘m gunna kiss ya ‘til y’ve gone _stupid_ from it, ‘cause _tha’s_ what i want right now.”

“… You promise?”

And he tangles his hand in your hair, pinning you to the bed and occupying your mouth until you can’t think thoughts anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And another I only just finished banging out. Bow chica wow-wow! ;)


	46. The Morning.

Waking up next to Russ is… _Really_ nice.

Not that waking up next to Sans _isn’t_ , it’s just that… Sans likes to roll away in the middle of the night, likes to stretch out, gets uncomfortable if your limbs get intertwined if you fall asleep in a cuddle. You think it might be the physical distance thing, or just a preference to not feel constricted or held down as he sleeps. You don’t take it personally, since you know how sweet and affectionate he is when he’s awake.

But Russ? Russ completely _engulfs_ you with his large, angular body.

And it’s somehow not the _least_ bit uncomfortable either – you can feel his hard ribs pressed into your back, a warm reminder of his comforting presence, and his solid arms are wrapped around your middle protectively, but loosely, not like he’s restraining you but more like he just wants to hold you as close as humanly (monsterly?) possible.

His soft, warm breath is also brushing past your ear and neck, sending excited tingles all the way down to your toes.

… But you don’t know what time it is, and you’re not sure that Sans even knows where you are. Also, Nora will have to go outside sometime soon.

You roll over in his arms and Russ barely stirs.

“Russ, wake up.”

“mmmno.”

“… Russ.”

“five more minutes.”

You kiss him at the corner of his mouth. Instinctively he turns his head slightly to kiss you more fully, sucking in a breath as his arms come up to hold you.

You sit back on your legs and his hands drop to hold you by your hips, eye sockets opening slightly to pout at you.

“aw, but _darlin’_ -“

“We should get going,” you assert, giving him a sympathetic smile. “Can you help me get dressed so I can get back to the hotel to look after Nora and see Sans?”

At the mention of Sans and Nora he seems to perk up a bit more. “right, right. you get clothes, i’ll get nora an’ take ‘er t’ do ‘er business at home.”

“Thanks, Russ.”

* * *

Sans was already awake when you got back to NTT resort hotel with Russ, who was quick to take Nora home after she gave you and him some enthusiastic good morning kisses. Sans seems a bit quiet this morning – he’s dressed for the day in a relaxed dress shirt and jeans and has apparently ordered room service to bring breakfast up for the both of you.

“… We didn’t do anything, if you were worried,” you fret, sitting at the end of the bed facing him. “We stayed at the Inn overnight, but we just talked and then fell asleep.”

His eyebrows raise, surprised?

“ _OH_ , _NO_ , I WASN’T- I MEAN, I DIDN’T THINK YOU _DID_ , UH, _ANYTHING_ ,” he struggles. “SORRY. I EXPECTED PAPY TO TAKE YOU ON DATES HERE AND THERE DURING OUR STAY, AND BESIDES… YOU _KNOW_ I WAS HALF-KIDDING ABOUT THE ‘I GET TO BE FIRST’ THING, RIGHT?”

Well, he did say it in a slightly joking manner, and it definitely broke the tension in the moment he’d brought it up, but…

“… I think we just want to respect your wishes?” you attempt. “And besides, half-kidding means half- _serious_ , too. I don’t want to do anything that would hurt you.”

“… IS, UH, IS THAT CONDITION PUTTING UNDUE STRESS ON YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH MY BROTHER?” he asks.

You have to stop and think about that for a second. You don’t think it is, but… Russ is clearly ready for the next step, and you _think_ _you_ might be, too. The only one putting the subject of sex on pause really is Sans.

“… BECAUSE IF IT _IS_ , MAYBE WE CAN JUST FORGET ABOUT IT.”

“… What?”

“IF YOU _WANT_ TO, WITH PAPYRUS, THEN…”

“Wait, wait, _wait_. Stop right there.”

You crawl over the bed to him. He jerks at your sudden pursuit and feels warm in the face when you hold his cheekbones in your hands.

“You are like, on _fire_ with anxiety right now,” you point out, feeling it through the soulbond. “You’re really mixed up about something and _nervous_ as all _hell_ … What’s _really_ going on?”

He sighs sharply, putting his hands over yours as he blushes a deep indigo and looks away. “W-WELL, YOU’RE MY _BONDED_ , SO-“

“Wait. _Nope_. Stop again.”

“WHAT??” he protests, looking frustrated and confused.

The _last_ time he used that reasoning, he’d outed himself to you as trans. And the whole soulbond situation was honestly messed up to begin with – if your _life_ hadn’t been on the line, would he have ever told you in the first place? If you didn’t see it for yourself, would he have ever even said anything or just carried on as you were?

“Don’t… Don’t use our being _soulbonded_ as an excuse to force yourself to tell me what’s bothering you,” you insist. “Like, I _get_ it, that’s supposed to be some major super intimate thing, but if something is _really_ bothering you _this much?_ Then don’t _force_ yourself, least of all for my sake, okay? I’m sorry I got insistent.”

It distantly occurs to you that you used a contradictory argument on Russ just last night, to get him to just relax about things _because_ you’re soulmates. These boys can be polar opposites on certain things, and you’re always somewhere around the middle.

He looks into your eyes for a long moment, then lets out a long sigh. He takes your hands gently in his, holding them over his lap. “… I THINK THIS IS SOMETHING WE _SHOULD_ TALK ABOUT ANYWAYS, BONDED OR _NOT_ ,” he resolves. “JUST… CAN WE CHANGE THE SUBJECT FOR NOW? AT LEAST FOR TODAY.”

“Yes _please_ ,” you grin.

He lets go of one of your hands and tangles his phalanges into your hair, drawing you in and kissing you warmly, and you can feel his soul relax and release a lot of the tension it was holding onto. “THANK YOU,” he says softly as he breaks it off. “YOU KNOW, I DON’T THINK YOU GET JUST HOW AMAZING YOU ARE SOMETIMES.”

“Me? _Naww_ ,” you tease.

“ _WELL_ ,” he smirks, moving to pin you to the bed beneath him. You go easily, enjoying it when he gets all husky and dominant. “YOU’RE _AMAZING_ , JUST IN CASE YOU NEEDED THE REMINDER. AND, MAYBE-“

There are three loud knocks on the door, and a muffled voice calling out.

“- _THAT’S_ BREAKFAST. _SHIT_ ,” he hisses through his teeth as the moment is ruined.

You giggle as his grip loosens and he clambers off the bed.

“We’ve got the whole morning ahead of us,” you remind him gently. “We can pick this back up later, you know.”

He turns and grins at you.

“DON’T WORRY, WE _WILL_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's like, I want Sans to be all sexy and a bit dom, but then the boy has issues he's not yet open about and it's complicated to write that? Anyways, there's going to be a proper sex talk in a few chapters I think, partly to move the ship into the bone zone and partly to iron out my headcanons for how transgender monsters work.


	47. The Walk.

Today Sans wanted to take you on a romantic walk through Waterfall, and as he started describing it to you it became impossible to refuse. He didn’t think it would be safe for Nora though, so you texted Russ to come pick her up and bring her home for a few hours.

But while Sans mentioned a boatman to get there, he also commented that he didn’t trust him. Something about paying a fare or solving a puzzle, but that both were always rigged against you. So you had to walk through Hotland for a while, which meant rocky outcroppings around an _active volcano_ , but he held your hand tighter where the paths became narrower and made _sure_ you both made it through okay.

“SORRY WE COULDN’T TAKE THE ELEVATORS EITHER,” he mutters as you cross a rickety bridge and enter into cooler caverns. “THEY HAVE A ONE IN TEN CHANCE OF DROPPING PASSENGERS INTO THE LAVA LAKE – WHILE I COULD _PROBABLY_ DISARM OR EVADE THE TRAP I DIDN’T WANT TO RISK IT WITH YOU.”

“Underground sure _seems_ nice enough on the surface… Dirty looks and deadly traps aside,” you say uncertainly. “… Is this _really_ how you and Russ lived?”

“YES,” is all he can say.

Once you’re in Waterfall, you can say that it was absolutely worth the long sweaty walk to get here. The ceiling above you sparkles with crystals emitting faint light – mostly turquoise, but with purple and yellow stones as well. It looks very much like the starry night sky on the surface, and there’s even a telescope set up in one of the rooms to get a magnified view of the shining stones.

As you reach for the telescope, Sans grips your hand and gently peels you away. “DON’T LOOK THROUGH THAT,” he warns severely.

“… Another trap?”

He rolls his eye lights. “NO. ONE OF PAPY’S OLD PRANKS,” he explains. “HE PUTS INK ON IT DAILY. IF YOU PUT YOUR EYE TO THE EYEPIECE YOU WILL GET A DARK STAIN AROUND IT THAT WON’T WASH OFF FOR A _WEEK_.”

You guess he’s fallen for this at least once before.

“BESIDES, THERE’S NOTHING TO SEE ANYWAYS,” he huffs. “HE PAINTS OVER THE GLASS AT THE OTHER END.”

… Yeah, he’s definitely fallen for it before. You snicker in spite of your attempts to hold it in. He momentarily looks offended, then chuckles at the memory.

Moving on, you find a room with glowing lakes full of reedy plants and you gawk at it. There’s a faint mist coming off the ponds that feels nice and cool against your sweaty skin, so much so you can almost forget about the sweltering trek through Hotland.

“This place really is so beautiful,” you comment, feeling at peace with the gentle glow all around you, the lack of a breeze, and you can almost even hear soft music playing in the distance somewhere.

“IT’S PROBABLY ONE OF THE MOST PEACEFUL PARTS OF THE UNDERGROUND,” he agrees. “SO MUCH SO THAT THERE’S HARDLY ANY TRAPS TO WORRY ABOUT. MONSTERS JUST CAN’T BRING THEMSELVES TO DUST EACH OTHER IN SUCH A BEAUTIFUL PLACE.”

“… You came here a _lot_ as a kid,” you remember.

He lets go of your hand, laying down on the ground and resting his hands behind his head, looking calmly up at the cavernous ceiling above. “IT’S CALMING… SAFE, OR AS SAFE AS WE CAN _GET_ DOWN HERE… NO ONE TELLING ME WHAT TO DO, WHO TO _BE_ …”

You decide to lie down on the stony ground next to him, following his gaze. There are stalactites sparkling with blue and purple gems all over hanging just above.

“It’s good to be able to get away from stuff sometimes,” you suggest. “Clear your head, start over with a fresh mind. Relax, get a mental reset on things.”

He turns his head slightly towards you and smiles broadly. “YEAH, _EXACTLY_ LIKE THAT.”

Then he rolls on his side looking at you, just so lovingly, and you know he wants to kiss you. You want to kiss him too, so you roll to face him, interlacing your fingers with his.

And just before your lips touch, his phone buzzes in his pocket.

“FUCK’S _SAKE_ ,” he curses, sneering at his phone as he takes it out. He dips in and steals a quick peck on the lips.

You giggle at that. “Work, right?”

“YEAH, IT’S THE QUEEN. I HAVE TO TAKE THIS,” he sighs as he climbs to his feet. “SORRY,” he adds, helping you up.

“It’s okay. I can wait, go see what Toriel needs.”

He smiles, thankful for your understanding, then answers his phone.

“YES, YOUR MAJESTY?”

A long pause.

“… SHE DID **_WHAT?!_** ”

He covers the mouthpiece and looks at you. “IT SEEMS THAT ALPHYS FUCKED SOMETHING UP AND I NOW HAVE TO SAY A _LOT_ OF EXTREMELY VULGAR THINGS ABOUT HER,” he explains. “I’M JUST GOING TO STEP INTO THE NEXT ROOM. DO YOU MIND WAITING HERE FOR FIVE MINUTES?”

“You’re leaving me alone?” You’re surprised – Waterfall _must_ be a pretty chill place if he’s comfortable doing that after how worried he was for your safety throughout all of Hotland.

“I’LL BE TWENTY FEET AWAY AT MOST,” he sympathizes. “JUST STAY IN THIS AREA AND YOU _WILL_ BE SAFE. I’LL CALL PAPY TO COME KEEP YOU COMPANY IF THIS TAKES TOO LONG.”

“… Okay, I trust you,” you smile, nodding. “I might be tempted to wander, but I won’t go far.”

“THANK YOU,” he breathes. “I’LL BE DONE SOON, I _HOPE_.”

You chuckle at that and send him off with a kiss square in the center of his forehead. He beams at you and very hesitantly steps backwards into the previous room.

“YES, MY QUEEN. I WILL FIX THIS STRAIGHT AWAY.”

You turn back to sit and look out over the ponds at the cavern. It feels emptier without Sans at your side, but you know he doesn’t intend to leave you on your own for too long. You find a couple of flat rocks alongside the pools of luminescent water and decide to try and skip stones across it. The first one is a bad throw – it falls straight in on its side. Then it bubbles up, weirdly floating on the pool’s surface for a moment, before being deposited back onto the shoreline right next to your foot.

… _Huh_. Okay then.

You do a couple more throws, skipping a stone successfully three times before it vanishes into the pool. The water returns the stone every time you try, almost as if it’s participating in the game with you.

Once you get bored of that, you stand up and nod at the water. “Um… Thanks,” you say awkwardly. “That was pretty cool.”

A rush of large bubbles rises to the surface in response. You knew _some_ things about Underground were going to be just _weird_ , but you definitely weren’t expecting _that_.

Speaking of weird things, Sans did mention something about echo flowers in his explanation of what you’d find in Waterfall earlier, and there just so happens to be one nearby. Apparently if you speak to one, it will record what you say into it and play it back to you.

You head over to the flower and poke one of its petals gently.

‘ _Sardines, mustard greens, collard greens, kale, and some strawberries if you’ve been good! Hah hah!_ ’

… What is this, someone’s _grocery list?_

You think you might have something better to record into it.

You hold the flower by two of its petals gently, gathering yourself.

“… Sans…”

You take a deep, nervous breath.

“… I think I’m… I’m in love with you.”

You let go, then step back and hold your stomach. It feels good to say it out loud for once, but you’re still not sure about saying it _to_ him, just yet. After all, in spite of the emergency soulbonding situation, this relationship still feels very _new_.

And because you work in IT, you have the compulsive need to check that the recording actually worked. You poke the flower again.

‘ _… Sans… I think I’m… I’m in love with you._ ’

… And now you suddenly wish it didn’t. It’s your own voice speaking back to you, which is cringey enough as it is without it being you saying… _That_.

You sigh. It must be more than five minutes by now. You wonder if it’s serious?

“Well I’ll _be_ ,” you hear a voice behind you, and you turn to see a turtle monster with a cane and a scraggly beard. “Been a long time since I’ve seen a _human_ wander through these parts. You lost?”

“… General Gerson??”

Your mouth responds before your brain can catch up, and you slam your hands over it as you gasp. But it _must_ be true, as you remember him clearly from Gaster’s memories.

He hesitates for a moment, his non-lazy eye squinting. Then he cackles and whistles, leaning heavily against his cane. “Now, it’s been a very, _very_ long time since anyone’s called me that,” he chuckles. “Yeah, I served in the guard for a spell – or used to. Haven’t done for quite a while now. Not sure there’re any monsters still alive who remember that…”

… He squints at you again, and you clam up. You _really_ slipped up saying that out loud. _Now_ what is he going to do to you?

Not sure what else to do, you get into a ready stance from the brief martial arts lectures you’ve been to, focusing on using your shields to block any attacks that might be coming your way.

He sees you tense up in a pose, the cackles again, standing straighter and twirling around his cane like he doesn’t even need it. “If it’s a fight you’re thinkin’ of, don’t let the old man look fool you – I can still square off with the best of ‘em. But,” he adds, setting his cane against the floor again. “… Even _I_ know better than to try and pick a fight with a _mage_ , of all things.”

You blink, shocked. You stand up straight again, feeling a little silly now. “Uhh…”

“… We should talk. Don’t you think?” he grins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was just a lot. I barely knew what to call it.


	48. The Story.

“… That’s quite a story.”

Gerson coaxed you into his shop, which was apparently just a couple of hallways from where you last saw Sans. You’re sat on a box while he leans against the counter, sitting on a barrel just on the other side of it. He’s prepared a ‘sea tea’ for each of you, though you haven’t taken a sip from your mug yet, as it has a strong seaweed scent.

… You felt like you could trust him, given Gaster’s memories of his pacifist nature and hatred for violence amoung his own kind, so you told him. You told him about Gaster, and what happened in the void.

“See, _I knew_ from the _look_ of ya that you’d have something interesting to tell me,” he cackles again.

“… Sorry, I feel like I’ve talked forever, and I know most of it doesn’t really make a lot of sense,” you apologize. “Most people don’t even really remember Gaster because of what Russ did to him – it seems like only him and me even really know about him.”

“Nah, I remember junior clear as day,” he dismisses with a wave of his hand.

You’re shocked. “You do??”

“Don’t you know the saying, girl?” He points to his temple. “Tortoises _never_ forget. Or wait, was that elephants? Hah! I don’t remember!”

You sputter a laugh at the bad joke, and he grins broadly that he got a reaction out of you.

“But- You seriously remember?” you reason. “Russ said that trapping him in the void made everyone _forget_ about him and everything he did. That the world just sort of fills in the blanks without him, or something.”

He shrugs. “Not sure what the reason is, but it never really affected me. My memory of things has always been near-perfect – I know what I had for breakfast a hundred years ago today still, what the weather was like in Snowdin sixty years ago last Sunday, and every page of every book I’ve ever read. Pretty sure it’s my boss monster ability or somethin’, never figured out what else it could’ve been, but I wrote all the history books we have down here pretty well.”

So he has almost perfect recall? Even where the void erasure thing is concerned? “That’s amazing,” you comment. And having lived on the surface before the war, he’s easily eleven hundred years old or _more_.

“Ehhh, it’s _somethin’_ alright,” he shrugs, looking about ready for a nap.

“… Um, Gerson…” you hesitate. “… Do you think I’ll ever be able to forget about Gaster?”

He whistles. “Not rightly sure, but it sure sounds like you hope so.”

“I still have all of his memories – Russ says my memories of him should fade over time since he died in the void, but I don’t think they are,” you sigh. “I kind of just wish I could forget about it all already so I can move on with my life.”

Gerson tsks at you. “Now now, y’know what they say about history, right?”

“… That you have to learn it so you don’t repeat it?” you attempt.

“Exactly,” he grins.

“… But there isn’t really anything left for me to learn from… From what _happened_ , right?” you counter. “And… He _can’t_ come back, right? He’s _gone_.”

“It _does_ sound like ya did a number on him,” he acknowledges. “But I’m just sayin’ that having those memories might help you out in some other way. Not sure _how_ , but it’s interestin’ to think about, eh?”

Just then the door swings open, revealing Russ with a stricken look on his face.

“you’re here,” he sighs, then slides his hands in his pockets and chuckles. His whole posture instantly relaxes.

“Everything okay?” you ask.

“sans had ta split fer a home visit,” he says, sliding in to take a seat next to you on the small wooden crate. “i was comin’ t’ look after ya but didn’ realize y’ found gerson.”

“More like Gerson found me, and I opened my big dumb mouth,” you sigh. “Sorry for wandering off.”

“’s fine. this ‘s the safest place in the underground anyhow.”

“… Because it’s so calm and peaceful here?” you ask.

“yeah, because it’s gerson’s _front yard_.”

Gerson lifts his cane and swings it around in a flourish, then sets it aside again. “If any monsters even _think_ about starting fights on my lawn I’ll give ‘em a _wholloping_ that’ll send ‘em home crying for their _mama_.”

Russ grins, rubbing at his cervical bones. “oh, i _know_. ‘m _still_ feelin’ that one fifteen years later, _old man_.”

“This one’s good at finding trouble,” he gestures at Russ dismissively. “You’d best watch yourself around him miss.”

“ _hey_ , i learned m’ lesson.”

“Not quick _enough_ , ahaha!”

* * *

You’re glad you decided to trust Gerson and spend some time talking with him, even though it didn’t really resolve your issue with still having Gaster’s memories. Still… It felt like spending time with an old, trusted friend, that you didn’t even know you had previously. You promised absently to come back for a visit at some point, although you’re not really sure when you’ll be able to make good on it, with all of the crazy stuff still happening back home.

As soon as you’d said your goodbyes and left with Russ at your side, he’d taken you around the corner to hug you tightly, kissing into your hair and letting out a long, relieved sigh.

“… Russ?”

“was worried when i couldn’ find ya right away,” he mumbles, backing off slightly to look at your face. “glad you’re ok.”

… He must have _really_ been worried, huh?

“… Sorry for wandering off,” you apologize reflexively. “I know that, just because it worked out okay because _Gerson_ was the one who found me, doesn’t mean that it couldn’t have been some _other_ monster instead, someone who might’ve tried to hurt me.”

“… sans lettin’ ya use yer shields?”

“Not really. Not _yet_ … I made new ones at the cave entrances per Toriel’s instructions, but besides that and informing the guard about it _that_ secret is still mostly under wraps,” you explain.

“well, next time, if y’ meet a monster who attacks ya, i don’ want you hesitating,” he says grimly, holding your face and fixing you with a severe look. “protect yerself first an’ foremost, okay darlin’? i don’ _care_ what sans says ‘bout you bein’ our secret weapon, an’ i _know_ he’d agree an’ just deal wit’ the fallout if it came down to it.”

You hold his hard forearms gently. “… I _kind_ of expected that I might have to do that anyways, but… Are you really sure?”

“absolutely. i _never_ want anythin’ bad happenin’ to ya, angel.”

You wither under his serious expression as the intimacy of the moment starts to register with both of you at once. Russ might lack confidence in himself in having an exclusive relationship with you, or feel as though he doesn’t really understand how it’s supposed to work in the first place, but this moment? Of just plain, protective instinct, of opening himself up to his emotions and sharing them with you?

… You know without a _doubt_ that he’d never be so open about his feelings with anyone else. You _know_ he’d never hold anyone else as tenderly as he holds you.

Grabbing the front of his jacket, you pull him down and kiss him on the mouth. He’s stunned for a moment, warm magic radiating from his orange-red cheekbones, before his lips start moving with yours, encircling you in his arms and drawing you into him so he can kiss you deeply.

“mmm,” he moans after a minute, breaking the kiss although you can tell he doesn’t want to. “we should get a room or somethin’,” he notes.

“I mean I _have_ one, back at NTT Resort,” you chuckle.

“naw,” he rejects. “that’s yours an’ sans’ love nest. ‘sides, i got another idea. somethin’ _fun_.”

“What did you have in mind?”

His eye lights seem to brighten in their intensity as he fixes you with a sultry look. “darlin’, ‘m takin’ ya to grillby’s.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My writing has been feeling like it's falling flat again recently and this chapter is definitely giving me that vibe, even after going back through it and trying to fix the narration at parts. I've also just not really felt like writing for a little while? But I'm trying to move this fic places so I'm trying to get back on top of it.


End file.
